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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26220520">The Last Day of Summer</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/felloskata/pseuds/felloskata'>felloskata</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Impossible Wishes [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - No Pennywise (IT), Angst, Anxiety Attacks, Bisexual Female Character, Bisexual Male Character, Bisexual Richie Tozier, Coming Out, Fluff, Gay Eddie Kaspbrak, Gay Male Character, IT Movie References, M/M, Mentions of Games from 90s, Mentions of Movies from 90s, Mentions of Songs and Celebrities from 90s, Mild Sexual Content, Movie: IT (2017), No Underage Sex, POV Eddie Kaspbrak, Reddie, Richie Tozier Has ADHD, Senior Year of High School, Set In 90s, Slow Burn, Song Lyrics, Sonia Kaspbrak's A+ Parenting, Sorta Enemies to Lovers, Stephen King's IT References, Underage Drinking, mild homophobia</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 09:55:22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>79,934</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26220520</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/felloskata/pseuds/felloskata</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>''Have hope on impossible wishes. After all life is meant to be lived on those wishes.''<br/>- Arson Varghase</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Beverly Marsh/Richie Tozier, Bill Denbrough/Beverly Marsh, Bill Denbrough/Mike Hanlon, Bill Denbrough/Mike Hanlon/Ben Hanscom/Eddie Kaspbrak/Beverly Marsh/Richie Tozier/Stanley Uris, Bill Denbrough/Stanley Uris, Eddie Kaspbrak &amp; Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Patricia Blum/Stanley Uris</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Impossible Wishes [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1904311</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. candy cheeks</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was the last day of August in 1994. Eddie and his friends have decided to go to the festival in Derry to enjoy the last moments they had left before going back to high school.</p><p>Eddie and his two best friends had visited the festival in Derry together every year, and year 1994 was no exception. It was their last year before the graduation, and his friends couldn’t be more excited about finishing their education on high school, going to college and moving with their lives. Unfortunately for Eddie, he had no choice. At least, he thought he didn’t. </p><p>From an early age, his mother had the future planned for him. He didn’t mind it though because he didn’t have a reason to move away anyway. He just wanted to graduate and have a peaceful year, that was all he wanted.</p><p>His friends Bill Denbrough and Stan Uris have been his best friends since they were in the kindergarten together. In fact, they were his only friends. They usually spent every living moment together. He didn’t need anyone else, he loved them.</p><p>The celebration was held in the city center, in the park, right in front of the Paul Bunyan statue. It was a perfect place for that occasion. It was not far from their high school and about a twenty minute walk from Eddie's house, however, the weather was not so great. It was a cold evening. </p><p>After the three boys had spent a few hours on the festival, they decided to go and get cotton candy. On the way to the stall with cotton candy, the boys could smell candy and popcorn in the air as they were walking by the other stalls. They had already managed to eat a whole box of popcorn, few corn dogs and a couple of lollipops before, despite the fact that they had been there for only a few hours.</p><p>When they reached the stall with cotton candy, Stanley decided to go and buy tickets to the Ferris wheel, where they wanted to go afterwards, to save them some time because it was getting late and it was almost dark, so Stanley turned on his heel and left.</p><p>''Strawbe-berry? Right, Eddie?'' Bill asked Eddie when they both were waiting in the line. ''You know me Bill, you don't have to ask every time we do this, are you sure you want to pay for all this food? I can pay for myself.'’ Bill shook his head. ''It's a-alright, don't wo-worry about it.''</p><p>After a few minutes, it was their turn. A beautiful girl with a short, slightly curly, red hair was standing behind the counter. Eddie remembered her from school, but he didn't remember her name, Bill did.</p><p>''Hi, Bev,'' Bill looked surprised to see her there. ''Hi Bill... and you are Eddie, right? Nice to meet you, I'm Bev, Beverly Marsh,'' she said in a beautiful and friendly tone, and hold out her hand to shake. </p><p>Her name sounded familiar to Eddie, but he didn’t know why. ''Hi, yes, nice to meet you Bev.'' Eddie was also a little taken aback when Bev knew his name, he always felt like he was invisible at school. He was not popular, unlike others, and did not have many friends.</p><p>The two smiled at each other and Bev put her hair behind her ear, and Eddie could see a few freckles flash on her face. She was beautiful. </p><p>‘’We've never been in class together, but I had English with Bill last year, so I heard a lot about you,’’ Bev said when she noticed Eddie's confused expression and smiled again. Bill blushed, and Eddie gave him a confused look, as to why he would talk to someone about him. Bill shrugged while he was still blushing. </p><p>Bill then started talking to Beverly, and they didn't mind that there were people standing in the line behind him, who were also waiting for cotton candy. They were mostly talking about the summer holidays and school. Eddie wasn't eager to talk to her and to people he didn't know in general, so he didn't join the conversation and zoned out while Beverly was making cotton candy for them. He was just awkwardly standing there, watching them. </p><p>In that moment, he noticed a boy with a smirk on his face looking at him from the distance, not far from the stall where he was standing. There was something almost dangerous about him. The boy looked a little older than him and Bill, especially because he was very tall. He looked like he was probably a head taller than Eddie. He had longer, curly, dark hair and was wearing a Hawaiian shirt, casually unbuttoned and part of it tucked into his black jeans. He was leaning against the lamp and smoking, just staring at Eddie. </p><p>After their gazes met, the boy smiled at him with an amused expression on his face, and Eddie immediately looked away. His eyes ended on Stan, who had already bought the tickets to the Ferris wheel, and was heading towards them.</p><p>‘’What is taking you guys so long?’’ Stanley seemed irritated, but Eddie knew Stan and he knew he really wasn't. He just always seemed to be irritated by everyone. ‘’Bill got... caught up. ’’</p><p>‘’Oh.'’ Eddie saw something twitch in Stan’s eyes for a second, but couldn't really tell what it was. He thought nothing of it.</p><p>Eddie then looked again in the direction, where the mysterious boy had been standing before, expecting him not to be there anymore, but he was still standing there, smirking at Eddie, but he wasn't smoking anymore. That time Eddie didn't look right away, instead he glared at him annoyed, and the boy just laughed to himself. Eddie decided to rather ignore him, and turned to Stan and Bill again.</p><p>After a while, Bill finally stopped talking to Bev and was holding cotton candy for each of the boys, a pink one for Eddie and blue ones for Stan and himself. He handed Eddie the pink one and the blue one to Stanley. ‘’Finally, thanks Bill,’’ Stanley tasted the cotton candy, and satisfied grin appeared on his face. ''Thank you,'' Eddie then tasted his own and they started walking towards the Ferris wheel. </p><p>'’No-no problem, do you have the ti-tickets Stan?’’ Stanley smirked and pulled the tickets out of his pocket to show him. ’'Yeah, unlike others, I wasn't distracted and flirting with other people.’’ Bill blushed and slightly pushed Stan to his shoulder, and Eddie just smiled at the two of them. </p><p>Eddie loved Stanley’s sense of humor; he always managed to make him laugh with his remarks.  ‘’Oh shut u-up.’’ Bill blushed again and they all laughed. Bill was more like a mother of the group, or a father, he always took care of both boys and tried to make them feel loved. </p><p>One day, when they had been still going to the middle school, Eddie and Stan had gotten into a fight and as a result of that, they hadn't said a word to each other for weeks. Bill had managed to put an end to it, and Eddie and Stan had said to each other that they would never argue and fight like that ever again, and they have never done. </p><p>Later when the boys were on the way to the Ferris wheel, Eddie’s thoughts about his best friends were interrupted because he noticed Bill's parents and his little brother Georgie in the distance, walking towards them. </p><p>Eddie liked Bill's parents and Georgie very much, they were very demanding of Bill, but they were also very nice and it was clear that they really love their children, unlike Eddie's mother. Eddie loved his mom and she loved him, but it was different. His mother was a very manipulative and possessive person. </p><p>When Eddie was fifteen years old he and his mother had had a very big argument because she had treated him like a five year old boy and had kept forcing him to do everything she wanted. She wanted him to swallow pills, that she had claimed, had been helping him. She had been telling him, if he didn’t take them, he would immediately become ill and die. Eddie had believed this statement for a very long time, longer than he should have, but when he was fifteen years old, he had found out that his mother was exaggerating and they were just placebos, he hadn’t had to take at all. </p><p>He had lived his whole childhood unnecessarily afraid. He had been basically scared of everything as a result, even afterwards. His friends knew about that, and always tried to help him, but it hadn’t been easy. Later, he had confronted his mother, and they hadn't been so close since. He had started lying and avoiding his mother a lot, and they had stopped talking, unless they had been eating together.</p><p>In that moment, Eddie was almost eighteen years old. He often wondered what she would do if he left her, but he has never acted on his thoughts, he just dreamed about it. Despite all of that, he did not want to leave her.</p><p>''Billy!!'' They heard Georgie shout few feet from them. The three boys turned to him as he ran towards them as quickly as he could.  ''Hi Georgie, d-do you have a good time h-here?'' Bill asked, and Eddie was smiling softly at them. He always wanted to have sister or brother.</p><p>Georgie was very similar to Bill, not so much in appearance, but in the way he expressed himself. They often played with Georgie when they were younger, and Eddie loved Georgie as much as Bill. </p><p>''Yes, we were just on the Ferris wheel.'' Bill's parents just caught up with them as well. </p><p>''I h-hope there is a ni-nice view, we a-are heading there right now, hi mum, hi dad.'' They smiled at him. ''Hello Mrs. and Mr. Denbrough,'' Stan and Eddie looked at each other because they said it in union. ''Hello boys, I hope you all have a great time here, be careful, and do not be here for too long, you know you have school tomorrow.'' Bill and Georgie both frowned simultaneously at the word 'school'. </p><p>‘’Don’t wo-worry mom, we will, we a-are heading to the Fe-Ferris wheel, so see ya lat-ter,'’ Bill gave Stan and Eddie a look and they understood, he no longer wanted to talk with his parents, and wanted to go. It wasn’t a long conversation, but Eddie wouldn't want to talk to his mother either if he were with his friends. ‘’Bye Mrs. and Mr. Denbrough,’’ Mrs. Denbrough smiled at Stan again. </p><p>Eddie also wanted to say at least 'goodbye', but Bill was already leading him and Stan away, so he didn't have a chance. Eddie then heard Georgie shouting something at them from far away, but couldn’t tell what it was.</p><p>When they reached the Ferris wheel, they immediately went to stand to the waiting line. Eddie didn't expect the Ferris wheel to be so massive. He stumbled a little, and wondered if he should tell Bill and Stan that he would rather wait for them there, safely on the ground. </p><p>When he was little, his mother had frightened him when she had told him stories about people who had fallen from cliffs and towers, and he had been afraid of heights ever since. His mother had scared him to the point that he had had 'an asthma attack'. Bill and Stanley knew about his fear, but he was doing much better since then. They didn't notice his hesitation, but he was sure he must have looked like he was dying. </p><p>Eventually, Eddie decided to suppress his fear and go. Everyone had already eaten the cotton candy, and fortunately, the waiting line was not long, so it was almost their turn. There were seats for four people, and above each seat was a red canopy, it looked like umbrella. It was quite magical.</p><p>After a few minutes, it was their turn. A young boy, who was a little older than them, opened the small gate for them to get on, and they slowly crept inside. Stan and Bill sat down side by side on one side, and Eddie stayed alone on the other. </p><p>The boy then started slowly closing the gate when someone ran towards them, jumped over the small gate, and sat down next to Eddie, then handed his ticket to the boy. </p><p>The boy said nothing, and left to move the lever in order to move the wheel and allow other people to get on. It all happened so fast, Eddie barely comprehended what had happened. </p><p>Next to Eddie was sitting the boy who had been looking at him near the cotton candy stall before. He was leaning on the handle and grinning at Eddie. Eddie looked startled. </p><p>‘’Hi, I’m B-Bill.’’ Bill on the other hand, looked amazed when he greeted the boy.</p><p>‘’Richie,’’ they shook hands and he winked at Eddie who was sitting next to him. Eddie blushed, but decided to ignore him again, just like he had done before. Richie seemed little arrogant to Eddie’s liking, judging by the way he talked, moved and stared at Eddie, not to mention the wink he just gave Eddie.</p><p>‘’You know, it is pretty rude to jump here between us like that,’’ Stanley was glaring at him with hostile expression on his face. </p><p>‘’Stan, don’t b-be rude, it’s alr-right, we d-don’t mind, right?’’ Bill glared at Stanley telling him to be nice with his eyes, and then gave him questing look. Stan just rolled his eyes and looked away. </p><p>‘’Stan the man, my dear, nice to meet you too,’’ Richie moved his gaze to Stan and grinned at him. Stan gave him a hateful look and rolled his eyes again.  Eddie could tell he didn't like him, and Eddie didn’t blame him at all. Richie seemed like that kind of person who did what he wanted, like jumping into other people's seats, and these people always got away with everything, and everybody always loved them for some odd reason. Eddie? Not so much.</p><p>‘’I couldn't let this cute boy... sit here alone, so I took the opportunity,” Richie smirked at Eddie proudly. Eddie's cheeks flushed, and he realized that Richie must have watched him since they had locked their eyes together for the first time. Eddie then rolled his eyes, and was still pretending that Richie was not there. He became extremely annoyed by Richie's presence at that point. </p><p>Eddie was also mad at himself because he was just sitting there, letting Richie mess with him. It almost sounded like Richie was flirting with him at times, but Eddie rather believed that he was just messing with him. Why would he flirt with him? </p><p>‘’Cute, now your cheeks look like that cotton candy you were eating, so cute!’’ The fact that the boy called him 'cute' irritated Eddie even more. ‘’I’m not cute!’’ Eddie almost yelled at Richie. ‘’Sure, you are, candy cheeks.’' </p><p>Unbelievable, Eddie thought to himself. He glared at him again and crossed his arms while he looked like an angry toddler. He just wanted that ride to be over. He really wasn’t in the mood, and Richie just laughed at him again. </p><p>‘’No one wants you here, we are not your friends,’’ Stanley said after Richie stopped teasing Eddie. </p><p>‘’Stan, stop it, he was just tr-rying to be nice, and this se-seat was empty, anyway,’’ Stanley just rolled his eyes again at Bill that time, and Eddie was still annoyed but decided to just sit there in silence. He knew he would never see Richie again anyway. </p><p>‘’That hurt,’’ Richie made a dramatic gesture, and put his hand on his chest as if his heart ached while he was looking at Stan. ‘’Thank you Billy-Boy,’’ Richie turned his gaze towards Bill. Eddie stayed quiet for the rest of the ride, and so did Stan. Bill and Richie had managed to exchange just a few sentences, mostly about the view, before the ride was over. Eddie was glad it was over because he would be away from Richie.</p><p>Stan and Bill left from their seats first, arguing about where would they go next, and Eddie stood up, wanting to follow them, however, in that exact moment, the entire cabin, where Eddie and Richie were, started moving, and Eddie sat back into his seat. They still hovered above the ground and had to jump from the cabin in order to get out. </p><p>Richie immediately stood up when he saw Eddie stumble, and held out his hand for him. ‘’Come on, I'll help you get out,’’ Richie smiled at him softly. ‘’No, thank you, I can get out by myself just fine,‘’ Eddie said, still annoyed, he didn't want Richie to see him helpless, he was also embarrassed. </p><p>Despite Eddie's protests, Richie was still standing there and offering his hand to Eddie. ‘’Come on, we can’t be here all day.’’ Eddie rolled his eyes at him again, and then grabbed his hands. Together they reached the small gate, and Richie let go of Eddie’s hand, Eddie immediately grabbed on the seat while Richie opened the gate, jumped out, and stood under the cabin with his hands held out for Eddie again. </p><p>‘’Don't worry, I'll catch you.’’ Eddie didn't trust Richie, but it was better than jumping out on his own, so he took his hand, and jumped out after him. They both stumbled, but were safely on the ground. </p><p>Meanwhile, Stan was telling something to Bill a few feet away from Eddie and Richie.</p><p>’’Thank you,’’ Eddie said quietly, still embarrassed. Richie just smiled proudly again and gave him the same look he was giving him the whole time when he was looking at him near the cotton candy stall. </p><p>''Can you stop looking at me like that? It makes me uncomfortable.'' Eddie had snapped before Richie could say anything. ''I can't help it, your pink cheeks are so cute.'' Eddie glared at him. </p><p>''Okay, I'm sorry, I'm just joking.'' Richie put his hands up in defense, and Eddie noticed that the boy’s hands were big, he had long slim fingers. ''You didn't tell me your name?'' Richie put him out of his thoughts. ''And?’’</p><p>‘’If you don’t want me to call you ‘candy cheeks’ you better tell me.’’Richie raised one of his eybrows at Eddie. ‘’Grrrw…, stop it’’ Eddie almost growled at him and rolled his eyes again.</p><p>Few seconds later, a man approached them and Richie’s grin was finally washed out of his face. The man pulled Richie aside and started talking to him. The man didn’t look very happy judging by his facial expressions, so Eddie decided to rather disappear very quickly. He wondered what that was about, but at the same time, he didn’t care and just caught up with Bill and Stan.</p><p>‘’What was that about?’’ Bill asked when the two boys were looking to the direction from Eddie had came up to them, however, Eddie just shrugged. ''He is such a jerk, unbelievable.’’ Stan clearly wasn't delighted with Richie either. ''Yeah.''</p><p>That time Bill rolled his eyes, and they decided to leave shortly after.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. remember me</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Eddie heard an unpleasant sound that pulled him out of his dream. It was the sound of his alarm clock. Eddie reached out weakly to turn the alarm off, then sat down on the bed, and rubbed his eyes. He realized it was the first day of school. Eddie turned to look at the alarm clock to see what time it was, and saw that he had exactly one hour to prepare for his first day at school. </p><p>He got out of bed and went to the bathroom. There he took a quick shower, brushed his teeth, and fixed his hair. Eddie had dark brown hair that began to curl into really wild waves every time it got longer. After that, he put on the clothes; he had prepared the day before, and looked at himself in the mirror. </p><p>Eddie was wearing his favorite dark blue sweatshirt, which was a little bigger on him, because it was his father’s old sweatshirt. Each sleeve was colored differently, one was yellow and the other one was red. He was also wearing long red socks and dark blue jeans. It wasn't a special outfit, but Eddie felt good in it. </p><p>Then he stacked everything he needed, a pencil case and a few notebooks in a yellow backpack, which matched perfectly with his sweatshirt, and then took the backpack, and headed for the dining room.</p><p>Eddie and his mother lived in a small house with only a ground floor. It was house for only two people, so it was enough for them. Eddie's father died of lung cancer, when Eddie was five years old, and his mother has never found anyone else. </p><p>It was a beautiful little house. There was a small kitchen connected to the living room and the dining room. His mother's bedroom was right next to the kitchen, however, she often fell asleep in the living room while watching a TV, so she wasn't really sleeping there. Eddie had his own room at the end of the hall, and there was a bathroom next door. The house was decorated in mid-century style, despite the fact, it was year 1994. </p><p>His mother had been already waiting for him in the dining room with prepared breakfast when Eddie stepped into the room. He noticed right away that there were pancakes with a maple syrup and strawberries served on the table. It made a smile on his face because pancakes were his favorite dish. He was convinced that he could eat pancakes with strawberries for breakfast, lunch and dinner every day.</p><p>"Morning Ma." His mother smiled at him, and motioned for him to sit down. '’Good morning Eddie-bear, I made you your favorite meal, I want you to have an amazing first day.'' </p><p>'’Thank you.'’ Eddie sat down at the table. His mother did the same, and they both started eating in silence. </p><p>Later, when Eddie was full after he had eaten three pancakes, his mother, on the other hand, was eating her fifth, and still wasn't finished. It wasn't something unusual. His mother was overweight in stature and loved food. She was also spending most of her time in the living room watching TV, and she worked at the hospital as a receptionist, so she didn't have much exercise at work either. </p><p>Eddie was sometimes worried about her health because of her weight, but he was sure that if he mentioned something about her health to her, she would only turn the conversation into argument about his own health. Eddie knew his mother and her manipulative tactics well enough.</p><p>''Thank you for the breakfast, I have to go now, bye Ma.'' Eddie put his backpack on his back, and opened the door. ''Bye, have a nice day at school and be safe, don't forget...'' Eddie closed the door; not bothering about what was his mother trying to tell him. Then he left their front porch without a second thought.</p><p>He usually went or rode his bike to school, because neither he nor his friends had a driver's license or a car, and there was no school bus in Derry. Bill intended to buy a car that year, but it was September and he still didn't even have a driver's license, however, Eddie didn’t mind walking or riding his bike. </p><p>Eddie had agreed the day before that he would walk to school with Stan, who lived not far from him. They used to walk to school together every day. Bill lived on the other side of the town, so they usually met up with him in front of the main entrance to the school.</p><p>After a few minutes since Eddie had left the front porch of his house and was walking down the street, he stopped and slowly turned his gaze towards a large house that had stood in the end of the street and been uninhabited and for sale for about three years, however, Eddie noticed that the sign 'for sale' was no longer there.</p><p>It was a modern house where a very wealthy family used to live. The family had later moved to the city, Eddie had heard his mother say on the phone the other day, and nobody has ever heard about the family again. </p><p>At that moment, it was clear that there were people in the house because there were one silver car and one older black car parked outside. Eddie was surprised, but also excited; he wondered what these neighbors would turn out to be like. He thought that they had to be rich because the family moved to one of the largest houses in Derry. </p><p>After a moment, Eddie decided not to think about the people who moved to the house because he didn't want anyone to catch him staring at house like a weirdo, so he got going again.</p><p>Stanley lived in a house similar to Eddie's. Only difference was that it was bigger and Stanley had the entire floor to himself.</p><p>Eddie didn't even have to ring, when he arrived in front of Stanley’s house because Stan was already coming out. ''Hi Eddie, I'm sorry I'm ready, my parents wanted me to wash the dishes, I hope you haven't waited for too long?'' </p><p>Stan looked tired, but he also had a satisfied smile on his face. ''No, I just arrived, you were on time actually,’’ Eddie laughed, and started walking again. Stanley joined him.</p><p>Stan was wearing a beige shirt and gray pants. Anyone who didn't know him would think he dressed up for that day, but he was dressing like that almost always and anywhere. It was his style. Only his normally lurking, curly light hair was styled to look a little more representable.</p><p>The walk to school took both boys around twenty minutes. The school was located in the city center right next to the park with Paul Bunyan statue; they had visited the day before.</p><p>When they arrived in front of the school, Bill caught up with them. Bill arrived there with George who seemed to be excited, however, Georgie was still attending a middle school which was located right next to the Derry High School, so they often walked together.</p><p> ''Hey guys, my p-parents made me go with him and ke-keep an eye on him, you know t-the first day... and everything,'' Bill looked little annoyed, but still seemed to be in a good mood.</p><p>''Hi Eddie and Stanley, are you excited for school too?'' Eddie thought, Georgie seemed to be way too excited. He wished he would have been to. </p><p>Eddie didn't have a problem with school, at least not with the work they were doing or grades, he was actually quite smart and really hardworking. What he didn't like were people, gossips, which were spread throughout the whole school, and the system. He also did not like talking in front of the whole class full of people, he was nervous and it made him feel anxious. One time, he got an 'asthma attack', because he couldn't handle that people were looking at him. </p><p>His ‘asthma attacks’ were not actual asthma attacks, but panic and anxiety attacks he had since childhood. He had been told they were asthma attacks by his mother and doctors, who had been influenced by her. The school nurse had later told him what was actually going on.  </p><p>''Woah, nah, I'm glad I got out of bed today.'' Everyone laughed at Stanley's remark, expect for Georgie, who frowned. ''Okay, le-let's go,'' Bill said quickly, and started leading Georgie towards the building standing not far from where the boys were standing.</p><p>Few minutes later, Bill came back and the three boys entered the school. They had to split up to go to their classes, each of them started with a different class. When Eddie woke up in the morning, he was a little nervous, but his brief conversation with his best friends has helped him, so he was no longer.</p><p>Eddie had the exact same classes as the previous year that day. The only thing, which has changed, was that he was supposed to have his first AP Psych class that day. He had chosen that class at the end of the previous school year along with AP Biology class ,he was supposed to have with Stan, and few other classes. He had no intention to go to college, so he had chosen classes he found interesting, not caring about the difficulty, and AP  Psych class was actually the one, Eddie was the most excited about.</p><p>The first two lessons were pretty boring. The teachers told students how to prepare for the next few days and made a small introduction. Eddie had these classes with a couple of people he had known, but he had almost never talked to any of them outside of the classroom. The next lesson, he was about to have was AP Psych class. </p><p>When he entered the classroom, the students were already seated. There were only a few seats left. Eddie chose the seat which was in the front next to the window. He sat down, put a pen on the table along with a notebook, and waited for the teacher to enter the classroom. </p><p>When the lesson began, the teacher entered the classroom just in time. The teacher was standing in front of the students for about a minute, without a word, just looking at the faces of students, then he spoke: ''My name is Mr. Carson, I can see many interesting faces here this year, I'm already looking forward to...'' Mr. Carson was interrupted halfway through the sentence by knocking on the door. </p><p>A boy entered and the students turned to look at him. The teacher turned his gaze as well and judging by the way he was looking at the boy, Mr. Carson really didn't like to be interrupted.</p><p>The boy said nothing; he just approached the teacher with a piece of paper in his hand. Mr. Carson took the paper from him and read to himself what was written on it. </p><p>''Welcome Richard Tozier, I'm delighted to know you decided to honor us with your presence today, sit down.'' Sarcasm was obviously not unfamiliar to Mr. Carson. Eddie could already tell that Richie and Mr. Carson would not get along.</p><p>Eddie couldn't believe his eyes when he saw Richie. ''It’s Richie and the pleasure is mine,'' Richie said with smug expression on his face. Mr. Carson handed the paper back to Richie, and Richie went to sit down to one of the seats in the back of the classroom.</p><p>On the way there, he glanced at Eddie and the smug expression still hasn’t left his face.</p><p>''I see, we have a comedian here, I'm sure that my assignments will no longer be so much fun for you Mr. Tozier.'' Mr. Carson was obviously ignoring Richie's comment about not calling him Richard and was clearly not pleased with his remark.  </p><p>''I hope in the exact opposite, actually. '' Richie said and smirked at Mr. Carson. </p><p>The teacher ignored him since, and continued with brief introduction into psychology. </p><p>After that, Eddie felt uncomfortable and couldn't focus on anything Mr. Carson was saying for another thirty minutes. Eddie already knew it was going to be a nightmare. He didn't even look at Richie, but he felt Richie's gaze burning a hole to his back.</p><p>When the class was over, Eddie quickly packed up and left the classroom. He had a free period, so he was heading for the cafeteria. He was hoping either Bill or Stan would be there.</p><p>He headed to the dispensing window to get his meal, not even interested what they had for lunch because he knew that it would be something disgusting. After that, he took a look around to see if Bill or Stan were sitting at some of the tables or not. Fortunately, Bill was sitting not far away from him. Eddie turned on his heel and headed for the table, where Bill was sitting.</p><p>"Hi Eddie, can’t believe it’s t-the first day of school and the me-meal is already disgu-gusting," Bill complained. Eddie sat across from him, but didn't say anything. He was lost in thought. He looked around the cafeteria again, but that time to see if he could see Richie. Fortunately, Richie wasn't there. </p><p>"Guess who have been in class with me just a few minutes ago? This year is going to be a disaster," Eddie complained as well, and started eating. Bill looked at him in surprise and with worry on his face. </p><p>''D-Do not tell me the AP Psych t-teacher is already giving you ha-hard time, c-come on, it was only first d-day, it cannot be that bad.'' Eddie placed the fork on the table disgusted after tasting the food he had for lunch. Instead, he picked up an apple. Bill was just looking at him waiting for his response. </p><p>''No, not the teacher… it was Richie, '' Eddie rolled his eyes and shook his head. ''R-Really? I didn't know he is g-going to our school, I've ne-never seen him here, maybe he just moved in town, I'm pr-retty sure Stan is going to be h-happy about this, I kinda wish they'd h-have a class tog-gether, just imagine." Bill laughed. </p><p>Eddie laughed too but still had a bad feeling about it because Richie loved teasing him and calling him funny names. ''I can't be in class with him." Eddie frowned and imagined talking in front of the whole class while Richie would be looking at him the way he had been looking at him at the festival. He suddenly started feeling sick to his stomach. </p><p>''Come on Eddie, he is a funny g-guy,'' Bill smirked at him, ''you might invite him to c-come to sit with us for lunch, just gi-give him a chance, you don’t know him, '' Bill raised his eyebrows,'' Bev is in class with me this year again, I might invite her as well, if it’s okay wi-with you?'' Bill blushed after saying that. </p><p>Eddie rolled his eyes at him. ''Whatever,'' Eddie said little annoyed, ''but I will never invite him, I don't want anyone to make fun of me when I try to eat this,'' Eddie pointed his finger at his almost untouched meal, ''whatever it is.'' Bill laughed and then gave him a strange look.</p><p>''He is not making fun of you.'' Bill said quietly without any sign of stutter in his voice.  Eddie could barely hear him and gave Bill confused look. </p><p>Bill stood up from his seat. ''I need to g-go, I want to do some stuff be-before the classes start again, I'll see you aft-ter school, okay Eddie?'' Eddie nodded and Bill walked away with his tray of food. Eddie wondered what it was all about. He got up after a few minutes, threw away his food in the garbage can, and left the cafeteria. He was supposed to have another few classes that day. </p><p>After school, he waited for Bill and Stan, exactly as they had agreed. He was waiting in front of the school when both boys and Georgie arrived. ''Hey, do you want to go somewhere this afternoon while we all still have some free time?'' Eddie asked because he had no plans for the day. </p><p>''I have to t-take Georgie home, but maybe later?'' Bill turned his gaze to look at Georgie who was smiling at them. Eddie nodded. ''I have my first meeting with the group today, but I would be free in three hours,'' Stanley said simply, ''actually, it’s the same direction Bill and Georgie are heading right now, so I was thinking I will go with them right away, is it okay?'' Stan turned his gaze at Eddie.</p><p>''Yeah, don't worry, have fun.'' Eddie rolled his eyes and frowned. He felt like his friends were treating him as a child sometimes because of the way his mother was threating him, but he was not a child and could handle going home by himself just fine.</p><p>Eddie said goodbye to his friends and started walking the opposite direction. "Can I go with you later in the afternoon?" Eddie heard Georgie ask his older brother in the distance, but he could not hear what Bill's answer was.</p><p>When Eddie was walking home through the city center, he was wondering if he needed to buy something while he was there. There were a few shops, not too many, but enough. After a while, he decided he didn't need anything, he just wanted to stop at the record shop. </p><p>Eddie loved music, but he didn't even have a music player, so most of the songs Eddie knew were from the radio his mother was often listening to in the kitchen. They were mostly country songs or love songs. He always admired and loved their hidden meanings and quite often imagined that the singer was singing about him and his life, except for the sad songs. </p><p>Most of the love songs he knew were about a boy falling in love with a girl, which Eddie quite often changed in his head to a boy instead.</p><p>Eddie hadn't realized he was gay for a long time because he hadn't been interested in anyone for a long time, but when he was around sixteen years old he had started realizing he liked boys. He knew it was because of his mother that he had not been interested in anyone. He also hadn't wanted to admit it to himself and he had tried to look at the girls and had tried to find them attractive. Some of them even were beautiful in his opinion, but the thought of kissing them or being intimate with them almost disgusted him, with boys not so much.</p><p>He has never came out to anyone, not even Stan and Bill. He was afraid. He considered telling Bill a couple of times, but decided against it. He was convinced Bill would be okay with it, but he wasn't sure about Stanley. Stan didn't like a lot of people for a lot reasons, and Eddie was just afraid he would hate him if he knew about it.</p><p>When Eddie was standing in front of the record shop, he was just inspecting the shop window with the new music records. He didn’t even bother to go inside because he couldn’t buy anything anyway. </p><p>After a while when he was ready to leave, he turned his gaze from the window and wanted to start walking, however, he saw someone standing right in front of him. </p><p>It was Richie. The boy was casually standing in the middle of the sidewalk, smirking at Eddie again, so Eddie had a better view of him than in the classroom. </p><p>Richie was wearing Hawaiian shirt again, different than the previous day, loosely unbuttoned. He had a chain around his neck and he was wearing trousers with a big visible belt. That time he had black modern glasses on his face, which looked more like sunglasses then the typical glasses most of the people in Derry were wearing. His hair was reaching his shoulders and was curled and sticking up everywhere.</p><p>Richie was standing there in front of Eddie with his hands in his pockets for a few seconds, examining Eddie. Then he moved the glasses, he was wearing, from his face to his head, and Eddie could see his face even better.</p><p>Eddie didn't want to talk to him. It was the last thing he wanted, so he just started walking away, towards his house, when he realized that he was staring at him as well, however, Richie turned on his heel and followed him. </p><p>''Remember me?'' Richie asked as if he didn't know that Eddie remembered him. ''No.'' Eddie rolled his eyes and Richie laughed. </p><p>''How could I forget?'' Eddie said honestly. Richie smiled at him, still amused. ''I had a feeling you wouldn't just forget about me, I think I am pretty unforgettable, ya' know…'' Richie pointed at himself.</p><p>Unforgettably arrogant moron, you mean? Eddie thought to himself and decided to keep on walking instead of telling him, what he thought of him. ''Do you intend to go home with me or are you just a really bad stalker?'' Richie smirked again and continued teasing Eddie. ''I couldn’t help it, I was drawn to you, but if you want, I will go to your house with you.'' </p><p>That time Eddie stopped and turned to look Richie straight in the eyes. He had to raise his head a little bit, given Richie's height. Richie stopped for a few seconds later as well, looking back at him, still grinning at him. It was driving Eddie crazy and his smile annoyed him the most. He just wanted him to leave him alone. </p><p>''Can you stop… this…,'' Eddie pointed at himself first then at Richie, ''whatever you're trying to do, it's not funny, I don't want to be your friend or if you are trying to piss me off, it's working, just leave me alone.'' Richie just laughed at him again. </p><p>''Me neither.'' he stepped closer to Eddie. Eddie just kept looking at him angrily while Richie was still grinning at him and staring him in the eyes intensively. Eddie didn't understand what Richie wanted from him. </p><p>''You are unbelievable!'' Eddie just rolled his eyes, and started walking again, and Richie wasn’t following anymore. When Eddie looked to the place where Richie had been standing before, he wasn't there anymore.</p><p>Eddie was quite taken aback by their conversation, nobody has ever talked to him that way before, and he didn't know what to make of it. He was so drowned in his own thoughts that he didn't even realize he was already standing in front of the door of his house after a few minutes.</p><p>His mother's car hasn’t been parked in front of the house yet, and Eddie was glad. He didn't want to talk to his mother. Eddie unlocked the door and immediately went to his room to take out his things from his backpack. Then he prepared his backpack for the next day, and picked up one of his comics and started reading.</p><p>When about an hour passed, he decided to go into the living room and give a call to Bill, so he picked up the phone and dialed Denbrough's house number.</p><p>Bill's mother picked up the phone. ''Hello Mrs. Denbrough, can I please talk to Bill?’’ Eddie asked politely. "Hi Eddie, of course, let me get him for you." Bill's mother left the phone, and Eddie could hear her calling Bill. </p><p>''Hi Eddie, I was just ab-bout to call, Stan and I agreed to g-go to the B-Barrens in two hours, he has g-gone to the meeting with people from that 'b-bird club' of his, is that okay?'' Bill informed him. Eddie expected it to be either the city center or the Barrens. They spent most of the time there and he couldn't be happier because he didn't want to go to the city center, and meet Richie again by accident.</p><p>''Yes! Great, I'll be there!'' Eddie replied right away with enthusiasm in his voice. ''Okay, I have to g-go now, D-Dad wants me to help him with housework, see you Eddie.'' Bill said quickly. Eddie then hung up and went to get something small to eat, then went to his room to read again.</p><p>When the time came, Eddie changed into something warmer because it was starting to be cold outside, especially the nights were cold. He picked up his sweatshirt, and put on his shoes. </p><p>His mother was still at work, so he took the keys, opened the door and locked the door behind him. He decided to ride a bike that time, so he took his bike from the shed they had in the garden, and drove for about as long as he walked to school in the morning with Stan.</p><p>When he arrived, Bill and Stan were already waiting for him. They didn't do anything interesting in the Barrens, they sat and talked most of the time, but it was their special place. It wasn't a club house or anything, but it was enough.</p><p>They were usually sitting on a log that was laid there and watched the river flow, just like that day. They talked about their first day in school and their new classes. Stanley was thrilled to talk about his 'bird club'. Bill also mentioned that he was about to have his first soccer training the next day. They also talked about each of them having to visit a school counselor to help them with college applications. Eddie didn't even want to go there because he knew it would be a terrible experience. </p><p>''…Bev said she m-might join the soccer t-team.'' Bill mentioned out of blue, however, it was not possible for girls to do sports in their school. Somewhere in New York or in any other big city, it would have been possible, but not in Derry. The same way people in Derry were looking at girls playing sports, they looked at homosexuals. That was also one of the reasons why Eddie never wanted to come out or mention something about liking a boy to anyone. Derry really wasn't suitable for people like him, but he had to learn to survive there, and he has done so far.</p><p>''You know she can't join right? Mainly because of these.'' Stanley made a gesture with his hands like he was holding his own invisible boobs. Bill pushed him a little in attempt to push him down on the ground, and Stanley almost fell off the log they were sitting on. Eddie started laughing at them. </p><p>''It w-was a joke of course, she knows t-that.'' Stan rolled his eyes. ''This was also a joke, idiot.'' Stanley then smiled and blushed at Bill instead of the usual frown he often had on his face. </p><p>They were talking for a few more minutes, and then decided to go home because it was getting dark. ''We f-forgot to tell you... guess who's coming to school wi-with us and is in Eddie's class?'' Bill had an amused smirk on his face and knew Stanley would not like it. Eddie rolled his eyes at him. He remembered the afternoon when he met Richie in the city center and for some reason he hadn't mentioned it to the boys. </p><p>''Let me think…Paul Newman?... came to our city?....and he was in class with Eddie? No way?'' It was dumb joke, but Stanley was teasing him back. He knew he wouldn't like it, judging by the look Bill was giving him. ''I hate you.'' Bill frowned. </p><p>"Richie." Eddie said awkwardly. ''Jesus, I hope he won't be in class with me, I'd rather eat my socks.'' Eddie frowned at him. ''Stop being so d-dramatic, b-both of you.'' The two boys rolled his eyes, but didn’t say anything else. Eddie took his bike and sat on it knowing that he would have to ride it slowly because Stanley did not have a bike with him. Bill had a bike and got on it too.</p><p>After a few minutes, they said goodbye to Bill. Later, Eddie said goodbye to Stan as well and they agreed to go to school together the next day again. </p><p>As Eddie turned onto his street, he looked at the house where his new neighbors lived and saw a figure in one of the windows. The person in window was probably getting ready for bed, it was already around ten in the night and it was already dark. </p><p>Eddie immediately recognized that it was Richie. The boy just stood there, looking to one side of the room. Eddie only saw his side profile. He was wearing the same clothes he was wearing when Eddie saw him that afternoon, only his glasses was back on his nose and it looked like he was talking to someone in that room. </p><p>He wasn't smiling like he normally did when Eddie saw him in public. He looked like he was annoyed, judging by his posture, but Eddie didn’t give many thoughts to that because a new thought flashed through his head. Eddie started thinking about the fact that Richie was actually very handsome, however, no matter how handsome Richie was, his character still totally disgusted Eddie. </p><p>Few moments later, he saw another figure appear in the window. It looked like the person started arguing with Richie, and that finally woke Eddie up from his thoughts.</p><p>Eddie then turned quickly and continued riding his bike to his house. Eddie started thinking he must have been really unlucky because that annoying boy had to move into the street where Eddie lived his whole life. He didn't know why Richie treated him the way he did or why was he even talking to him, especially when Eddie wasn't exactly eloquent and friendly to him.</p><p>''Where have you been, Edward?'' Eddie’s mother asked angrily when Eddie entered the house.  ''Outside,'' Eddie said simply, he didn't want to talk to her. </p><p>''I told you, you need to tell me where are you going? You want me to go and look for you? What if something happened to you?’’ Eddie rolled his eyes, but didn’t say anything. ‘’I made you a dinner, it’s in a...'' His mother continued, when Eddie was about to leave to his room.</p><p>''I’m almost eighteen Ma… thank you.'' Eddie cut her off, he really wasn't in the mood to argue. His mother just sat back in her chair, and turned to watch TV again.</p><p>Eddie was just counting minutes before his mother fall asleep right where she was, while he was eating his dinner. He didn't enjoy the meal much because the thoughts of Richie didn't want to leave his head, not even later, as he prepared for bed, and fell asleep.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. neighbor</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Eddie woke up in the morning, he wanted to avoid Richie as much as he could. He didn't have an AP Psychology class that day, so he just hoped he wouldn't meet him in the hallway or have another class with him. </p><p>On the way to school, Eddie met up with Stan, and they walked to school together again. He spent most of the time with Stanley that day because he had AP Biology class with him, and they both had free period afterwards. The thought of Richie didn't cross his mind the whole morning. </p><p>When school was over, Eddie and Stan headed home. As they were walking, a black car Eddie didn't recognize at first, drove past them, and honked at them, but it didn't stop. The two boys jumped a little because of the sudden sound which they did not expect to hear. </p><p>After a few second, Eddie realised that he had seen the exact black car before. He had seen the car outside of the house where Richie and his family had moved in, and Eddie put two and two together, and realized it must have been Richie who honked at them.</p><p>Eddie decided against telling Stan about who it was, he just kept on walking. He didn't want to talk about Richie or think about him. ''What a jerk,'' Stan said not knowing it was Richie, and followed Eddie. </p><p>Later that day at home, Eddie started working on a task one of the teachers had already given to him. He managed not to think about Richie until the evening when he went to bed again. The thought of him only flashed through his mind. He just reminded himself to continue with the same tactics which meantavoiding and ignoring Richie again. Unfortunately for Eddie, he had AP Psych class the next day.</p><p>When he woke up in the next morning, he no longer felt as fresh as before, but he still managed to get up in time and start with his morning routine. </p><p>Eddie liked to experiment with his clothes, hovewer, he knew very well that he couldn't do it much, especially not in Derry. He didn't want to stand out and get in trouble, so he usually wore ordinary clothes, so as usual, he decided to wear a simple green sweatshirt with light blue jeans.</p><p>When he was still in middle school, other kids had often picked on him and laughed at him because of his clothes which he hadn’t usually chosen to wear; his mother had chosen the clothes for him. One day he had gotten into a fight with Henry Bowers and his gang because of it. Henry had been calling him 'wheezy', 'queer boy' and other names very often. It wasn't something unfamiliar to Eddie. </p><p>He hated when people were calling him names which was why he hated it when Richie had done it. He hated her mother for calling him ‘Eddie-bear’ as well, but she still did it, despite all the complaints from Eddie. It didn't matter if it was offensive or not, he just didn't like it. </p><p>When he had gotten in a fight with Bowers, Bill and Stan had been also there. They all had gotten in trouble because of it, and his mother had had to go to school because of him for the first time ever.</p><p>The Bowers gang had included Victor Criss, Reginald ''Belch'' Huggins, Patrick Hockstetter and Henry Bowers, of course, they had been known for bulling and making fun of all the students at the Derry Middle School, at that time. When they all had gone to high school, they had fallen apart. </p><p>Shortly after they all had started attending Derry High School, Patrick's parents had put Patrick in mental hospital, located outside of Derry because he had been hurting people, and his parents had been afraid he would have killed someone one day. At least that was what Eddie had heard. </p><p>Belch had dropped out about a year after Patrick left, and had moved away from Derry, nobody has ever heard from him again. </p><p>Victor had dropped out a year after Belch, and had started working at one of the local stores in Derry where Eddie was refusing to ever step in since he had found out, and Henry Bowers was still attending Derry High school with Eddie, Bill and Stan. </p><p>Fortunately, Henry had left them alone since 'The Bowers gang' had fallen apart, and he didn't go to school much anyway. Henry was older then Eddie and his friends, but he had failed a few classes and had to retake the senior year for the third time. Unfortunately for Eddie, he was in the senior year as well, that year. In conclusion, Eddie had two people he had to avoid that year.</p><p>After Eddie got dressed, he headed to the kitchen. His mom had had to leave for work sooner, and Eddie wasn't in the mood to make himself a breakfast, so he just took a pear which was in a bowl in the kitchen, and left.</p><p>Eddie wasn't in the mood for anyone that day. He just hoped he would survive the day without any inconveniences. When he was walking past Tozier's house, he didn't even take a glance its direction. </p><p>When Eddie and Stan were walking to school, they didn’t say much to each other. They only exchanged a few sentences. Stan clearly wasn't in a good mood either. </p><p>They met up with Bill and Georgie in front of the school again, Georgie didn't look that excited as he was on the first day. After a while, they split up and everyone went to their classes.</p><p>Eddie had fifth period free that day, and he was supposed to have AP Psych class with Richie before that. Bill and Stan also didn't have any classes, so they decided to meet up in the cafeteria afterwards. Bill also told Eddie that he had invited Bev to join them for lunch, but Stan didn't know about it. Eddie didn't care about Bev much, but he wasn't really in a good mood that day, so he wasn't happy about it. She seemed like a great person, but he just didn't want to talk to anyone else, expect for Stan, Bill and Georgie that day.</p><p>The first three classes were boring, but way too short to Eddie's liking. Eddie wasn’t looking forward to the AP Psych class as much as on Monday. He had chosen that subject because he found psychology interesting and also partly because he wanted to understand why people behave the way they behave, by people he meant people like his mother, so the only thing he wasn't looking forward to was Richie.</p><p>When the time for the AP Psych class came, he entered the classroom. The classroom was almost empty; he took the same seat as before and pulled a pen, a notebook and a textbook out of his backpack, and put it on the desk in front of him. He decided he would just ignore whoever would come to the class, whether it would be Richie or not, except for the teacher of course. In order to do that, he decided to fill the time by drawing and making notes from previous lesson that he missed because he was distracted by Richie. </p><p>After a few minutes, Eddie raised his head when the teacher entered the class, and refused to turn around and look if Richie was there or not, so he didn't even know if Richie was sitting behind him or not.</p><p>Mr. Carson started the lesson by explaining the basics of more complex psychology. Eddie was taking notes the whole time and didn't let himself be distracted by something or someone again. He was actually really interested in the topic. If Eddie was being honest, Mr. Carson scared him a little. He seemed like a strict teacher, who was respected by his students, and if someone didn't respect him, he would make their life living hell.</p><p>"Richard, get your feet off the table, this is not your house." That was the remark Eddie needed to hear in order to know his assumptions were correct. Richie was indeed sitting somewhere behind him. </p><p>Eddie rolled his eyes, still refusing to turn to look at Richie, and decided to continue writing his notes. However, judging by the look on Mr. Carson face, Richie hadn’t listened to him.</p><p> "You don't want me to give you extra work, do you?" Eddie looked up at Mr. Carson who was looking to the back of the classroom where Richie was sitting. After a moment, Richie seemed to respond, but without a single word to Eddie's surprise. </p><p>When the class was over, Eddie quickly got up and left the classroom without making a single eye contact with any student, just like the last time, and was satisfied. The only thing that bothered him was that he would have to do this every time he would have AP Psych class. </p><p>Eddie entered the cafeteria because it was finally time for a lunch break. He noticed that Bev was standing in front of the cafeteria, as if she was waiting for someone, but Bill and Stan were already sitting at a table inside, talking about something very interesting because they didn't even notice when Eddie entered the room. He went to pick up his meal, put it on a tray, and went to sit down.</p><p>When he sat down, he was facing the entrance to the cafeteria. Bill was sitting right next to him and Stanley was sitting across from them. He greeted them, and smiled at them. They did the same.</p><p>''So how did it go? Is the AP Psych class at least a little interesting? Is Richie still acting like total pain in the ass?'' Stan asked with amusement in his voice. </p><p>Before Eddie could say anything at all, he saw Richie enter the cafeteria. The strange thing was that he was talking with Beverly. Eddie froze completely and had a frightened expression on his face because he remembered Bev was supposed to sit with them that day. </p><p>His expression scared both boys, Eddie was sitting at the table with, so they both looked in the direction Eddie was looking. Stan had to turn around.</p><p>When Bill saw Bev, he waved at her, and motioned for her to come and sit with them. Stan turned back and frowned at Bill. ''Are you crazy?'' Eddie was still in shock and must have look like he was dying because his face turned completely white. His whole plan suddenly collapsed.</p><p>Bev and Richie didn't have any tray with food, but neither went to get it, instead they were headeding straight to the three boys.</p><p>Bev was wearing a red dress with flower pattern and matching earrings. It wasn't a typical dress though. As she walked towards them, Eddie realized that it wasn't dress at all. They were actually pants that just looked like a dress. Eddie was amazed by that. He has never seen anything like it and it looked very well on her. Her hair was almost the same length as Richie’s, curled into wild waves, just like his. Bev looked exactly like one of the people who didn't belong in Derry. She had a strange style, short hair like a boy and joked about joining a soccer team, but unlike Eddie, she wasn't afraid to show it. Eddie was actually very amazed by her.</p><p>She had a friendly smile on her face as she was headeding towards them. Unlike Stan who was also looking at Eddie and Bill, but was already sitting at the table. Stanley looked like he was about to kill someone soon, and that someone was Bill.</p><p>Richie was heading towards the three boys as well. Eddie wasn't surprised to find him looking directly into his eyes with that annoying smirk on his face.</p><p>Richie was wearing one of his Hawaiian shirts again, which surprisingly matched Beverly's outfit, the black jeans, he had the day Eddie had met him, and he didn't have glasses on his nose that time. They looked almost like brother and sister, despite the fact that Richie had dark hair and was very tall, one of the tallest boys in school, and he had brown eyes. Both of them had freckles spread all over their bodies. Bev, unlike Richie, had red hair and light blue eyes, she wasn't that tall. She was nearly as tall as Eddie because Eddie was shorter than his friends and shorter than any boy in his class.</p><p>The moment Eddie noticed Richie; he looked down and started rummaging through his food. He wanted to act like Richie was not there. Bill ignored Stan, who was looking at him dangerously, and was still smiling at Bev.</p><p>''Hi guys, this is Richie, we have AA Theather class together, is it okay if he joins us too?'' Bev and Richie were both still standing and waiting for one of the boys at the table to montion for them to sit down. Since Eddie pretended he was not there and Stan was looking at them hostilely, Bill, who invited Bev in the first place, montioned for them to sit down, and nodded. Eddie didn't look up, not even on Beverly, and felt Richie's eyes still on him.</p><p>''Of course, w-we actually have already met Richie,'' Bill said warmly and proudly. Meanwhile, Bev sat down next to Bill, who was still sitting next to Eddie, and Richie sat down next to Stan, who, of course, gave him a hateful look.</p><p>Richie just looked at him and smiled, ignoring every look Stan had given him since they'd met. </p><p>''This is Stan,''  Bill said simply pointing to Stanley and smiled at Bev again. ''Nice to meet you Stanley, I'm Bev.'' Beverly smiled at Stan and hold out her hand to shake. They shook hands, but Stan haven't said anything to her, Bill just rolled his eyes at him.</p><p>After a few minutes, Bev and Bill started speaking privetly. Meanwhile, Eddie and Stan were eating quietly and haven't said a single word to anyone. Richie neither. It was pretty awkward.</p><p>Then Bill turned to Richie, who was still looking at Eddie, while Eddie had an absent expression on his face. He still pretended that neither he nor Richie wasn't there, either way, he ignored everything that was going on around him.</p><p>''You just moved to the town, r-right?'' Bill asked Richie after he had turned to him. ''Yeah, my folks bought a house almost on the other side of town, it's near the Penobscot river or something, it's a big house, way too big, I mean it's one of the biggest houses I've seen in this town so far, maybe you know it.'' It was the first time Richie didn't sound so arrogant to Eddie, but rather friendly. </p><p>Eddie pretended he wasn’t listening, but he did hear every word. It was interesting, whether he wanted to or not. ''You're k-kidding! That larg-ge house on Eddie's street? I mean…. Eddie lives th-here.'' Eddie darted at him angrily, telling him 'how dare you to tell him where I live' with his eyes. </p><p>Then Eddie turned to look at Richie who just smiled at him, but it was different smile than before, it was a sweet smile. "Your family must be r-rich, the house w-was for sale for years, nobody w-wants to move into this hell hole, and n-no one from people who live he-here have money to buy it," Bill added.</p><p>Eddie still didn't know what to think of Richie, he'd never met anyone like him in his life. Richie turned his gaze back to Bill. ''Well, pops did, ya know, he was a dentist back in the city, he earned quite a bit when we lived there, nothin' special though, he also bought dental clinic here in town.''</p><p>Eddie wondered why Richie and his family had moved in Derry. As much as he wanted to know, he knew it was too personal to just ask and Eddie didn't want to start a conversation with Richie anyway, so he didn't say anything. Those strange remarks and looks were enough for him. But after a while, a voice pulled him out of his thoughts. </p><p>It was Richie's voice, aimed at him. ''Ya know, I have a car, I could take you to school when we live in the same street, neighbor, huh?'' Richie asked with a smirk on his face again, and the sweet smile left his face.</p><p>The last thing Eddie wanted was being alone in a car with Richie, however, before he could say anything, Stan had spoken up: ''That's fine, we live close to each other, and we walk to school together, I think you can drive your car and honking at people and stuff, alone.'' </p><p>Eddie realized Stan had probably figured out who had honked at them the day before when they had been walking home, and Eddie was thankful to Stan for saying that, not knowing if Stan had done it for him because he knew Eddie was feeling uncomfortable in Richie's presence or for himself because he genuinely didn't like Richie, either way, he was thankful. </p><p>Bill gave Stan a look as if he wanted to kill him. Obviously, Stanley didn't mind at all and didn't care if saying that was rude or not, but that's how Stan always was. Richie just smirked at him. "Okay, I'm just offering, I can take you both, ya know." Richie said and looked at Eddie again. </p><p>''Woah, I didn't know you had a problem together, maybe this wasn't the best idea...'' Bev said worriedly. ''No, Stan tr-reats everyone he doesn't know like t-that, don't pay any mind to h-him, he is pr-robably nice to you because you're a g-girl.’’</p><p>''That's not true, I can be a very friendly person.'' Stan picked up his tray with food, got up, left the table angrily, then he put the tray away, and left the cafeteria without a word. ''D-Don't take it personally, he will come ar-round,'' Bill said to Richie and gave him an apologic look.</p><p>''That's cool, I'm use to it,'' Richie told him while he was still smiling at them, and they all gave him confused and pitiful look, including Eddie. This was the first time Eddie had felt bad for Richie. What did he mean by that? Eddie has never met anyone more confusing than Richie. </p><p>For another few seconds, nobody has said anything until Bev and Bill broke the tension. They both stood up from their seats. Bill gave Eddie and Richie a ‘see you later' look, and left. Bev still hasn't eaten, neither did Richie, but they seemed to be used to it. ''See you guys,'' Bev said simply and followed Bill, leaving Richie and Eddie alone at the table.</p><p>''The AP Psych class was interesting today, don't you think?'' Richie asked Eddie and smirked at him again, and Eddie already knew where he was going with that. </p><p>''The most interesting things were happening in the back of the class... but you wouldn't know, you had your eyes glued to the board or… Mr. Carson, I couldn’t tell,'' Richie started teasing him again. He must have enjoyed pissing Eddie off. Eddie didn't understand why he was talking to him like that and tried to make him angry when he could have a normal conversation with his friends.</p><p>''The teacher is up in the front, why should I look to the back of the classroom? It's ridiculous.'' That conversation was little awkward, especially because both of the boys knew what they were actually talking about, but none of them said it. Richie obviously wanted Eddie to look at him in the classroom, that day. At least, Eddie thought that, but he didn't understand why. Eddie figured that Richie probably just wanted to make him uncomfortable or make fun of him again, maybe that time in front of Mr. Carson and other students. </p><p>That thought made Eddie sick to his stomach. At that point, Eddie didn't know if he was paranoid or not, but who wouldn't be, given what he had been through. He was just confused about everything.</p><p>Eddie honestly just wanted to get out of the cafeteria and away from Richie at that moment. He knew he would never forgive Bill, not just for letting Richie join them, but also for telling him they lived on the same street, and for leaving him to sit there alone with him.</p><p>Richie smirked at him again. ''I just wanted to tell you that you won't get rid of me by ignoring me, we have classes together and I know your friends... '' Eddie glared at him. Richie knew what his intentions were. Not only he knew Eddie didn't want to talk to him and rather tried to ignore him, but Richie also didn't listen to him and just continued doing everything he could to piss him off. </p><p>Eddie wanted to get up, get out of there and never say a word to him again, so he did, however, Richie grabbed his hand and motioned for him to sit back. Eddie didn't want to at first, but then he did. He didn't want to make a scene, and Richie looked genuinely hurt.</p><p>''Listen Eds, I don't want to hurt you or make you angry, whatever… the point is I'm sorry 'kay, I meant it when I offered you a ride to school, just say a word and I'm yours.'' Richie's expression changed from hurt to smirk again. Eddie didn't know what to say. </p><p>"Don't call me that," Eddie said, instead of replying. Eddie concentrated on the thing, which was pissing him the most about Richie, the names and nicknames he was calling him. Richie smiled at him rather than taking him seriously while Eddie kept looking at him angrily. </p><p>''Thanks, but I'd rather walk ten miles to school every day than get in the car with you.'' Then Eddie got up, not caring about his tray with food lying there, and just took off.</p><p>In his next classes Eddie could not concentrate and was even more irritated than he was in the morning. He was extremely angry at Richie and Bill. He didn't even want to see Bill after school.</p><p>When he was finished with school, Stan was already waiting for him in front of the school, as they agreed, and Bill, who was supposed to be there, wasn't there.</p><p>''Bill has not finished yet? What is taking him so long today?'' Eddie asked Stan. ''He has, he has already left actually.'' Stanley seemed to be still angry, but when he turned his gaze to Eddie, his face softened. </p><p>''Oh,'' Eddie said absently and confused. ''We had a little argument because of the lunch break, before you arrived,'' Stan told him without a trace of emotion, ''he said he was going home, that you probably wouldn't want to talk to him either, and that we'd see each other at school tomorrow. ''</p><p>''Well, he wasn't wrong,'' Eddie told him still irritated, and remembered the conversation he had with Richie after Stanley, Bill and Bev have left, ''after you left, Richie turned into a jerk again, I don't know what I have done to deserve this.'' Stan actually laughed at Eddie's remark, but nodded. He understood, and they both started walking home.</p><p>''I don't understand what Bill was thinking, when he invited Beverly to sit with us, I mean it's obvious he likes her but....'' Stanley said simply and sounded like he was hurt for some reason. Eddie would have not catch anything if he didn't know Stan well enough, but he did, ''and she happened to drag Richie along, as if the food they gave us did not disgust me enough.'' Eddie laughed at that remark, even though he didn't think Richie was disgusting. At least not in looks, he was actually really attractive, but his attitude and the way he acted, not so much. </p><p>However, something else came to his mind. ''Wait you do really think Bill likes Bev, I mean more than just a friend? '' Eddie wondered why didn't he realize, was he so occupied by thinking and avoiding Richie that he didn't realized one of his best friends likes someone? Was that why was Stanley seemed to be hurt by that? Was he jealous?</p><p>''Come on Eddie, it is way too obvious, don't you see how he looks at her? And he keeps talking about her all the time, doesn't he? You're sometimes absolutely clueless Eddie.'' Stan rolled his eyes at him.</p><p>The situation about Bill, Stan and Beverly might have not been clear to Eddie, but one thing was very clear to him, and that was the fact that he didn't want to talk, see or look at Richie ever again. </p><p>Eddie simply wanted to continue with his plan and ignore Richie, and if necessary, he would just stop going to the cafeteria just to avoid him. He knew he could do it. He just didn't want to think about a boy who acted like he was flirting with him, then as if he was making fun of him, and finally as if he wanted to be friends with him. He didn't want to deal with any of that, so he decided to just focus on school.</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. he just wants to be your friend</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Thursday was not special for Eddie in any way. He was already looking forward to the weekend. He started feeling bad because he had been mad at Bill the day before for something that was not actually his fault, after all, it was not such a big deal that Bev had invited Richie to sit with them. Stan was still little mad at Bill for inviting Bev and Richie, but it passed eventually, and they all were talking to each other as before.</p><p>When it was time for lunch, Eddie decided in advance not to go to the cafeteria. He still didn't want to see Richie, that has not changed. Luckily for Eddie, he did not meet Richie that day at all. He only saw him in the hallway once, but as soon as he realized he was there, he decided to go to the opposite direction.</p><p>After school, he met up with his best friends again, and Bill invited the two boys to spend the weekend with him at his house. It was Bill’s mom idea because she wanted to meet Georgie's new friend who he met on the first day at school that year, so she thought it would be a good idea to invite Bill's friends as well. It was supposed to be the next day, which happened to be Friday. </p><p>The two boys agreed, not knowing if their parents would agree, but they were almost eighteen, and Eddie's mom and Stan's parents knew Bill, so it was not a problem. They planned to go right after school the next day and spend a night at Denbrough's house.</p><p>Eddie was thrilled to be able to spend time with his best friends and his best friends only without Richie or Bev, and the thought of Richie and Bev didn't cross his mind for the rest of the day.</p><p>On Friday, Eddie woke up in a very good mood. He packed his sleeping bag, his hygiene supplies and everything he thought he would need, and headed for the kitchen to tell his mother that he would be staying with Bill overnight.</p><p>Fortunately, Eddie's mother loved Bill and Stan. They both were from decent families. Expect for that one day when they had gotten into a fight with Henry Bowers, they have never gotten in trouble, and never hurt Eddie. That was why Eddie believed his mother would agree, and let him stay over. Even though Eddie and his mother weren't close anymore, Eddie still wanted her permission and was afraid that if she didn't know where he was, she would do something crazy like calling the cops. She was still very worried about him, despite Eddie's refusals to do what she was telling him.</p><p>When he entered the kitchen, his mother was making breakfast. ''Good morning Ma, I was thinking...'' Eddie started, but he changed his sentence, ''Bill invited me and Stan to their house today, and I'll be there until Saturday, so you don't have to wait for me when you get home, okay?'' Eddie announced instead of asking.</p><p>''When are you coming back?'' His mother asked with an absent expression on her face. Every time his mother answered his demand with a question, Eddie knew in advance that his mother would allow it.</p><p>''Probably sometime in the afternoon,'' Eddie said simply. His mother nodded, and continued making breakfast. When she put all the food on the table, Eddie was already seated, and she sat down at the table as well. </p><p>''Do you have everything packed? A toothbrush? An extra inhaler? Do you want me to help you with packing?'' Even though Eddie knew he didn't actually have asthma, he still carried an inhaler with him, not only because his mother wanted him to, but also because he had something that always helped him to calm him down when he felt anxious.</p><p>Eddie shook his head. ''No Ma, I have everything, you don't have to worry.'' That was basically how it has always happened whenever he wanted to go somewhere or spend a night with Bill and Stan. She had no idea what he was doing during the day and she has never been particularly interested in it, but he always had to be home for dinner or she would have started looking for him and freaking out. She had embarrassed him like that in front of his friends and their families a few times when he was younger, but they were used to it and knew what Eddie's mother was like.</p><p>After a few minutes, Eddie was full, said goodbye to his mother, and went to school. Since Eddie has found out Richie lived in that large house on same street, he picked up his pace and did not look in the direction where the house was every time he was walking by.</p><p>He arrived to school with Stanley as he did every day, and then they met up with Bill. They also agreed to meet up in front of the main entrance after school.</p><p>All the classes Eddie had that day were boring and ordinary except for one. He didn't have a class with Bill or Stan that day, but he found out later that he had a class with someone much worse. </p><p>One of the classes Eddie had chosen for his last year on high school along with AP Psych class and AP Biology class was Chemistry class which he had for the first time that day.</p><p>When he entered the classroom, he could not believe his eyes. He quickly found a seat for himself in the front of the classroom to be as far as possible from the person who was sitting in the back of the classroom. Eddie hopped that the person hadn't noticed him.</p><p>It wasn't Richie, but someone much worse. It was Henry Bowers.</p><p>Surprisingly, unlike Richie, Henry has never spoken during the lesson. Eddie was happy about that because he forgot Henry was there with him soon, and could focus on what they were learning that day in the class. When the lesson was over, Eddie got up as fast as when he had a class with Richie, didn't look at any of the students, and continued with his day. Eddie then avoided lunch again just like the day before.</p><p>When Eddie's last lesson was over, he left the classroom, and headed for the direction where he was supposed to meet Bill and Stan.</p><p>Eddie was walking down the hallway where he had stored textbooks he didn't need and a few other useless things in his locker. He noticed a group of girls standing by one of the lockers near him. As he got closer, he noticed that Richie was standing there as well. There were about five girls, and Eddie knew only one by name. It was Greta Bowie, the daughter of a man who had been selling Eddie pills, he had been taking all those years, and all the necessities his mother had ordered him to pick up.</p><p>Eddie had talked to Greta only once in his life. It was at the store when her father hadn't been there, so he had had to go to her instead. During that brief visit, Greta had managed to insult him and make fun of him because at the time he had been known as 'the sick kid' at school who could do nothing at all. Eddie has really despised her ever since. She wasn't nearly as terrible as Henry, but she was not a good person.</p><p>Greta and the other girls, Eddie didn't recognize, were standing opposite to Richie. They were looking like they were talking to him. Eddie couldn't see their faces as they had their backs turned to him, but from their body movements he knew they all were laughing at something Richie was saying to them.</p><p>When he came closer, he could see Richie's face clearly, and at that moment, he knew why so many girls were talking to him and why they were laughing at what Richie was saying. It was because Richie was clearly flirting with them. He was talking to them in the similar way he was talking to Eddie, but it was clear that it was a little more intense. Richie was touching Greta and the other girls unobtrusively with his hands, and was whispering something in their ears with a smirk on his face.</p><p>Eddie was close enough for Richie to notice him, so he decided to lower his head and go as fast as he could, so Richie wouldn't look at him, even though he looked busy enough. Eddie didn't want to risk anything. </p><p>However, before Eddie could lower his head, Richie had managed to look straight at him, and Eddie knew that Richie noticed him. In spite of that, Eddie lowered his head and continued walking down the hall. The other girls continued talking with Richie without a single glance at Eddie.</p><p>When Eddie came to the main entrance, he saw Stan, Bill, Georgie, and another boy already waiting for him. The boy looked like he was the same age as Georgie, so Eddie understood that he was probably the friend who would also be staying at Denbrough’s house that day.</p><p>The moment all the boys registered Eddie had arrived, Bill waved at him and the other boys, the one Eddie didn't know included, smiled at him.</p><p>''About time,'' Stan said annoyed. Everyone ignored him, and Eddie rolled his eyes at him. ''Hey, ma name is Eddie Corcoran,'' the boy said and held out his hand. Eddie noticed that Eddie Corcoran had a foreign accent. He must have moved to Derry from far away. </p><p>''My name is also Eddie, nice to meet you.'' They shook hands and Stan, Bill and Georgie started laughing at them. Eddie knew already that it was going to be very confusing. ''I loue yer name,'' Eddie Corcoran said and everyone laughed again, including Eddie that time.</p><p>Few seconds later, another boy came up to them, and he had a large backpack with him. He walked over to Eddie Corcoran, picked up the backpack, and handed it to him. ''Her’ yeh go an’ be home in time, yeh know…'' The boy raised his eyebrows at Eddie Corcoran, and smiled at all the boys standing there.</p><p>''Thank yeh’, don't worry, I know,'' Eddie Corcoran told the boy. ''This is ma brother’ Dorsey,'' Eddie Corcoran said simply to the other boys, and at that moment something occurred to Eddie. Dorsey was a boy who was still new in school, despite moving to Derry the previous year. Nobody knew him very much and he didn't have many friends. Dorsey and his brother moved from Scotland to Derry. At least, that was what Eddie had heard about them.</p><p>Dorsey and Eddie Corcoran were very similar in appearance. They both had brown, almost reddish hair, like Bill and Georgie. Eddie was shorter than Dorsey, but Dorsey was shorter than Bill and Stan. Both Corcoran boys were dressed in untidy clothes, had green eyes and the same smile. </p><p>After that, everyone introduced themselves to him, and Eddie was the last one who was introducing himself to him. ''My name is Eddie, like your brother,'' Eddie said and started blushing, not exactly knowing why, but he was shy in front of strangers. </p><p>''I know,'' Dorsey said. Eddie was apparently the only one who Dorsey knew by name from the three boys, and Eddie didn't know how it was possible that everyone he met in the last few days knew who he was when he has almost never talked to anyone.</p><p>Dorsey put him out of his thoughts. ''Yer name is the same as my wee brother' an' ye're quite unforgettable.'' Eddie blushed again. ''Actually we have a class together' this year, Chemistry class, yeh know?'' Of course Eddie didn't know, he was completely out of it at the time because of Henry, but at that moment, he started feeling better knowing that at least someone who was nice was in class with him. Eddie didn't know why, but there was something interesting about this boy, and Eddie was glad that he was in class with him.</p><p>''I gotta go, have fun... an’ Eddie,'' both Eddies looked at him, and everyone laughed at that, ''dinna be home late.'' Then Dorsey turned on his heel and left. Bill looked at Eddie with a strange look again, it was the same look he was giving him when they were with Richie. Eddie didn't know what to make out of it.</p><p>After Dorsey left, five boys headed for Denbrough's house. That day was a suspiciously good day for Eddie. He was in a great mood and was looking forward to the day with his best friends.</p><p>Along the way, the boys were talking about all sorts of things. Eddie found out that Eddie Corcoran is very mature for his age, compared to George at least. Georgie was sometimes too childish, but he was still a great kid. He was friendly, kind and always interested in everything. </p><p>A few minutes later, they arrived at the house where Bill and Georgie lived. They lived in a large house, almost as big as the house where Richie lived, but it was not as modern. They had a large garden, and at the back there was a small playground with swings and a slide. Next to the playground, there was a small porch, and in front of the house they had a beautifully maintained lawn and flowers.</p><p>When the boys entered the house, Bill's mother greeted them with open arms. She wasn't at work at all that day and Bill's father was not home yet, but he was supposed to join them later. Bill's family planned to make dinner outside by the fire that day. Eddie loved barbecue, so he was excited and was looking forward to it.</p><p>Mrs. Denbrough told them to go wash their hands. Then she asked Bill and Georgie for help, but all the boys wanted to help, so they did. </p><p>The boys helped Bill's mother prepare food for the grill, drinks and everything else they needed, and also helped her to take it all outside. When they were almost done, Mr. Denbrough arrived home from work, greeted them, and after he changed from his clothes for work, Bill's dad went to light a fire on the grill.</p><p>There was a friendly atmosphere and Eddie enjoyed it. He had never experienced the same thing with his family. His father and grandparents had died and he only had a mother who had never done such things with him as simple and ordinary as barbecue. </p><p>Bill's father also took the radio to the porch which he turned on and songs, Eddie had never heard before, started playing. It was a different genre of music than his mother listened to, but he liked it too.</p><p>Later when everything was ready, Bill's parents started frying meat on the fire along with cheese and vegetables, knowing that Stan and Eddie didn't like meat that much. Bill's parents knew both boys well, so it was not a problem for them to adjust.</p><p>After the meal was ready, everyone sat down at the table, including Bill's parents, and started eating.</p><p>When they were full, they thanked Bill's parents for dinner, and helped Mrs. Denbrough wash the dishes. By the time it was all done, it was evening, and the boys decided to watch a movie.</p><p>Bill's parents had a small television in the house, similar to the one Eddie had at home. Eddie didn't watch TV much at home, mainly because his mother was still watching some of her endless TV or cooking shows. That was why he had not seen and known many movies. </p><p>Most of the movies he had watched were the movies he had watched when Stan and Bill had decided to go with Eddie to Aladdin Movie Theater in town, and Eddie really enjoyed the time spent there. He loved watching movies as much as listening to music, especially the ones about love. He loved that he could have forgotten for an hour or more who he was, and he could imagine being a character in a movie. Unfortunately, they didn't go there that often.</p><p>Fortunately, Stan managed to bring a movie they haven’t watched yet. Most of the movies, Bill had at home, they had already watched before or were very boring.</p><p>The only movie Stan was able to get was called Stand By Me. It was a well-known movie. Since they only had one television, Eddie and Georgie insisted on watching the movie with them. Bill didn't want to watch it with them at first, but later he agreed.</p><p>After they finished the movie, Eddie was very carried away. He really liked the movie. It was about younger boys than they were at the time, but it reminded him of the old days when Stan and Bill were still playing and running outside with him. The only thing he felt sorry for was that River Phoenix, who had died a year before, starred in the movie. Eddie admired his performance and his character in the movie a lot. It was a great loss.</p><p>Later it was dark outside, and the boys decided to go to bed. They didn't want to go to sleep, of course, but they wanted to go to Bill's room at least to be alone after the whole day. They said goodbye to Bill's parents, Eddie and Georgie, and went upstairs with the backpacks.</p><p>It took them a moment to get ready for bed, but when they were done they spread their sleeping bags in the middle of the room, sat on them, and talked about all sorts of things. They talked about school, about their parents, about the movie they were watching, and of course they didn't forget to mention the free period and lunch with Bev and Richie.</p><p>''I d-don't understand why you have such a p-problem with him, both of you,'' Bill said astonished. Stan and Eddie just glared at him.</p><p>''He's acting like a jerk, I don't understand why you don't see it… oh I forgot you only have eyes for Beverly.'' Stan said with disgust in his voice. Bill blushed, and Eddie couldn't help himself and laughed at Stan's remark.</p><p>''That's n-not true, she's beautiful, smart and f-funny but I don't know, I don't w-want to date anyone, at least not now, we-we're just friends.'' Bill said honestly. ''Sure.'' Stan just rolled his eyes and obviously didn't believe him.</p><p>''Eddie, I know you d-don't go to lunch just because you d-don't want to see Richie, you know that it is s-silly, right?'' Bill said while he was looking at Eddie. ‘’I know, but I really can’t stand him, he doesn't look at you two the way he looks at me and talk to me, it makes me uncomfortable and I don't know why he does it.’’ Bill smiled at him and Stan rolled his eyes. </p><p>Bill and Stan looked at each other as if there was something only they knew. He gave them a confused look. ''Maybe he just wants to be your f-friend.'' Bill said to break the silence. ''Just come to lunch w-with us, and you too, Stan,'' Bill looked the two boys with a demanding look in his eyes. ''Please, Bev said that h-he is really nice and that it's a p-pity that you don't like him, that you should get to k-know him better and give him a chance… and I think so too,'' Bill added.</p><p>At first Eddie didn't know what to say, he really didn't want to, but he wasn't that kind of a person, who would judge people without knowing them and without really giving them a chance, so after all, he nodded. Stanley saw that Eddie nodded and started thinking. After a while, he nodded too.</p><p>''Okay, but I can't promise to be nice to him if he acts like a dick and make Eddie uncomfortable again.'' Stanley smiled at Eddie. Eddie was very thankful, he smiled back at him and mouthed 'thank you' at him. </p><p>''Great! I w-wouldn't expect anything less from you Stanley,'' Bill said with satisfied look, and Stan slightly blushed. </p><p>''And if he does something or says something gross again, I'll never talk to him again, whether you like it or not,'' Eddie said sharply this time. Eddie was pretty sure it would happen, and he didn't want to think about it at all, but he knew he could do it at least once. He didn't know why Bill wanted to be friends with Richie so much and why he wanted Eddie to be friends with Richie, but he didn't want to be a dick about it. ''Fair enough.'' </p><p>After that conversation, they decided to finally go to sleep, and when Eddie finally fell asleep, it was with the last thought of Richie again.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. my apologies señor</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was Monday, and it was time for Eddie to go to school again. He had a different schedule the second and the fourth week of the month, so he had different classes which meant that he wasn't supposed to have any classes with Richie for a week, and Eddie was grateful for that. He really didn't want to deal with him, especially that week because he was supposed to pay a visit to the school counselor on Tuesday, and he knew he shouldn't have been nervous about it, but he was, and his promise to Bill about meeting up with Richie at lunch wasn't helping.</p><p>Given the fact that it was Monday, he got out of bed without a problem. After breakfast, he went to school, and was acting like the house at the end of the street, where Richie lived, wasn't there. He met up with Stan, and later they met up with Bill in front of the school as always. Bill wasn't supposed to have a free period with Eddie until the next day which meant that he didn't have to see or talk to Richie until then.</p><p>The first class Eddie had wasn't interesting in any way. Eddie focused on making notes, so the lesson was quickly over. The second class he had that day was more interesting, surprisingly in a good way.</p><p>It was a history class which he had had the previous years as well, so he knew the teacher very well. The teacher was not particularly strict with the students, but not very friendly either, and it was the first time in that school year that a teacher gave him a project, and it was in pairs. </p><p>Eddie didn't have history classes with Bill like he had had the previous year, so he didn't know almost anyone there. The students who had friends there had already split into pairs and there were only a few students left who still did not have a partner, so the teacher assigned Eddie to someone he didn’t know.</p><p>Eddie's partner was a medium, but bigger figure. He was more masculine than Eddie, had blond hair and brown eyes. He was wearing a large sweatshirt and light blue jeans. When the boy sat down next to Eddie, he had a notebook full of papers in his hand. He looked like a writer with a notebook like that. It fascinated Eddie. </p><p>Eddie knew who the boy was, but he had never spoken a word to him, and they had never been in class together before. Eddie knew that the boy was new in school just like Dorsey was; they started attending the Derry High school in the same year. They weren't as new in Derry as Richie, but they were still considered 'the new kids', and that was exactly how people called the boy, who was sitting next to him, 'the new kid'.</p><p>''Hi, my name is Ben,'' the boy said, and smiled at Eddie. ''Nice to meet you, I'm Eddie,'' Eddie introduced himself, and smiled back at him. After that, they started talking about the project they were assigned which focused on the World War II and its impact on the United States. Eddie felt good about the boy. He was friendly and very nice. Eddie was sure that they would understand each other, and get along very well.</p><p>They soon figured out that in order to finish the project, they would have to meet up after school at some point. They haven't planned it yet, instead Eddie turned his gaze on Ben's notebook again which was lying on the desk after Ben had left it there. </p><p>''What is this for? Are you a writer or something?'' Eddie asked, not wanting to be noisy, but he was very interested in what he saw in front of him. ''It's nothing, just a few poems I've written, nothing special... really.'' </p><p>Eddie was amazed even more. He didn't know if the poems were good or not, but he could tell Ben had written a lot of them. Eddie could tell Ben had a romantic soul, he could tell by the way Ben spoke to Eddie, by the way Ben looked at things and people, and the fact that he was writing poems had only confirmed it. Eddie knew that his poems must have been beautiful. In spite of what Eddie thought, he just nodded, and didn't say more. He would love to read one, but they had just met, and Eddie didn't want Ben to feel uncomfortable, so Eddie asked him something else instead.</p><p>''Do you want to come to lunch with me today? Only If you have free period after this lesson, of course,'' Eddie didn't know why he had asked. ''Yes I do, and I have, I still don't know many people in this school to be honest, being 'the new kid' and all.'' Eddie understood, so he smiled at him, and the moment later, the class was over.</p><p>The two boys rose from their seats, and left the classroom. They headed towards the cafeteria.</p><p>When Eddie entered the cafeteria, he didn't see Stan or Richie anywhere. Bill told him in advance that he had a class at that time, so he didn't expect to see him, however, he noticed Beverly. She was sitting in the back of the room. Surprisingly, Bev waved at him as soon as he entered the cafeteria. </p><p>He didn't expect to see her either.  She motioned for him to sit at the same table as she did. At first Eddie didn't know how to react, so instead of reacting to her, he just went to pick up his lunch. Ben didn't notice Bev, and followed him. </p><p>After the two boys put their food on the tray, Bev waved at them, and motioned for them to sit next to her again. That time Ben saw her, and Eddie decided to go and sit there after all. Ben followed him again.</p><p>''Hi Eddie,'' Bev greeted Eddie enthusiastically. She seemed to be glad that he was there. Bev was actually very sympathetic. The only thing he didn't like about her was that she befriended Richie. ''You are the new kid right? What is your name?'' Bev asked Ben right after she greeted Eddie. </p><p>The two boys were still standing in front of Beverly, so she had motioned for them to sit down for the third time already. ''Hi Bev,'' Eddie said weakly and finally sat down. As he sat down, he could smell cigarette smoke mixed with a sweet perfume. Eddie was sure Bev must have been smoking too, just like Richie was. That was probably one of the reasons why she got along with Richie so well. They had the same bad habits.</p><p>"M-my... name is Ben." Ben sounded a bit like Bill because of his stutter, and blushed. Ben was shy, just like Eddie was. That was why Eddie liked him, and felt like he understood him. He saw himself in him. Like Eddie, he dreamed of true love, or so he thought he did.</p><p>''Do you know that you don't have to stand there and sit down with us, right?'' Bev said amused because Ben was still standing in front of Eddie and Bev with a tray of food in his hands. He had his notebook with poems on the tray as well. Ben's face was flushed while he smiled shyly at Bev. Eddie was sure he liked Bev from the first time he saw her, but who didn't. Ben then sat down across from them, and started slowly eating.</p><p>''I wanted to apologize for the previous week, I didn't want to cause any trouble, Richie isn't so terrible, at least not to me, he just is... just a little inappropriate sometimes and jokes around, I know, but otherwise he's really nice... I'm sorry, I just hope you don't hate me for inviting him if I knew..., '' Bev was telling to Eddie apologetically, and kept her eyes on him. ''Don't worry about it…it's okay,'' Eddie interrupted her absently, but honestly. He wasn't mad at Bev or Bill, at least not anymore.</p><p>Ben listened to their conversation without understanding any of it, but he didn't ask any questions about it, and Eddie was thankful for it. </p><p>After that, Bev also bit into her food. She had her own, Eddie realized it was probably a good idea, given the fact the food they had been given in the cafeteria didn't even looked like food. She nodded, and didn't say another word about Richie since. She turned her gaze to Ben instead.</p><p>‘'Do you know we have English class together? Maybe we should talk more.'' Bev smiled at Ben who blushed, and nodded. </p><p>''Are you a writer?'' The notebook Eddie had asked about before was lying on the table in front of them when Bev asked Ben. Ben took the notebook, and started showing it into his bag awkwardly. ''No, no, these are just poems I made up, not a big deal,'' Ben's whole face was red at that point, and Bev smirked at him. </p><p>''Poems? That's so cool, could you write me one? I'd like to know how good you are....'' Eddie thought Bev was just teasing him about it, and joking, but he wasn't sure, and Ben clearly wasn't either judging by the expression on his face.</p><p>''I don't know, maybe,'' Ben blushed again. Beverly just laughed, but nodded, and turned to Eddie again. Eddie eyed her, and it looked like she wanted to tell him something, but in the end she didn't say anything, and continued eating.</p><p>After they finished eating, they all parted their ways because each of them went to a different class. Eddie thought it wasn't too bad with Beverly, he liked her. </p><p>Unfortunately for Eddie, the next hour he had was Chemistry class with Henry and Dorsey again.</p><p>When he entered the classroom, he took to the same seat in the front as before, but that time he looked around the classroom instead of lowering his head down. Henry was in the back of the classroom, not noticing him or looking at the students at all, instead he was playing with the knife he had often threaten other kids in the middle school. Eddie remembered it very well.</p><p>Eddie noticed somebody else as well because not far from Henry was Dorsey. He smiled friendly at him, and Eddie blushed slightly. Then he sat down, and focused on what teacher started explaining to them a few minutes later. Nothing interesting happened for the rest of the day at school. </p><p>After school, he told Bill and Stan about Beverly and Ben. Bill was glad Eddie was at lunch with Beverly, and Stan didn't say anything, but if Eddie could guess he would say Stanley wasn't thrilled.</p><p>At home, he did some housework, homework for school, and when his mother came home from work, he greeted her, and had dinner with her. When he went to bed, he thought about what awaited him the next day which was a consultation with a school counselor. They were supposed to talk about college and his future which he didn't have planned at all, and avoided thinking about it. In conclusion, he wasn't looking forward to it at all.</p><p>The next morning, he tried not to think about it, but it did not really help, and it made him feel nervous the whole day.</p><p>It helped him a little when he talked to Bill and Stanley in the morning, and the fact that he had the first class with Ben. What was worse was that not only he had consultation with a school consular that day, but he also had a free period with Bill which meant he would have to go to lunch, and Richie was supposed to be there. Unfortunately, Stan had a class at that time. </p><p>Bill confirmed it when he had reminded Eddie of it before they went to their classes. It had been almost a week since he had spoken to Richie, but he was prepared for all his remarks and smirks. </p><p>When it was time for the lunch break after a few hours at school, Eddie was seriously thinking about not going to the cafeteria, but he promised it to Bill, so he did go after all.</p><p>The moment, Eddie entered the cafeteria, he saw Bill and Richie already seated at the table, and another boy was sitting with them as well. Eddie knew immediately who it was. Bill played soccer with him, and everyone at school knew him, not because he was popular, but because he was known as 'the only black kid in Derry'. His name was Mike Hanlon.</p><p>Mike was as tall as Bill and muscular. Eddie didn't know much about him, let alone the whole school. It was public knowledge that Henry Bowers and his father had a big problem with him and his family. He was their neighbor. They had a problem with Hanlon family literally just because they had a different skin color, and Henry's father was extremely racist, and because he worked for the police, he and his son had always gotten away with everything they had done. One day, his son Henry had even killed Hanlon’s dog, and then had told about it to the whole school. His father hadn't done anything about it; instead he had acted like they had deserved it. </p><p>Mike was also homeschooled for a long time, but when he was fourteen, he started attending the Derry High School. </p><p>That was probably everything Eddie knew about Mike at that point. Mike always seemed to be very nice, nicer than most of the kids at school, despite the fact that Eddie has never spoken to him.</p><p>Bill noticed Eddie, as soon as he entered the room, and waved at him. It wasn't quite smart to turn around and leave at that point, so Eddie just put food on his tray, and headed for the table where the three boys were sitting.</p><p>Richie looked at him, but without any emotion. He didn't even have a smile on his face. After they met their gazes, Richie smiled, but just slightly, and that was it.</p><p>''Hi Eddie, I'm g-glad you joined us t-today,'' Bill said with a smile. Mike turned his gaze towards him, and smiled at Eddie. Richie still said nothing; he was just staring at him. ''I'm Mike," Mike said and smiled at him with even bigger smile than before, and held out his hand to shake. Eddie took it, and sat down right next to Mike.</p><p>''Mike is playing soccer w-with me, and we start-ted talking to each other last w-week, so I thought I w-would invite him to lunch today,'' Bill explained and he was looking at Eddie. Richie was strangely silent the whole time until that moment. ''Mikey is with me in class too, I've never seen anyone who looks so sexy while standing in front of the whole class and talking about numbers.'' Mike and Bill laughed at Richie's remark, and even Eddie smiled. Mike was very handsome, so Eddie could imagine it. </p><p>Richie actually looked at Eddie after saying that, but when Eddie noticed he was looking at him, he stopped smiling and started eating. ''I'm Eddie,'' Eddie said simply after tasting the food he had on his plate.</p><p>After that, everyone else started eating as well, except for Richie because he didn't have lunch like the previous week. After a while, Mike and Bill started talking about soccer and school. Not only Eddie didn't know anything about sports, but he also didn't want to draw an attention to himself, so he decided to just listen and eat. Richie occasionally joined the conversation, but was mostly quiet as well.</p><p>''Are you going to see Mrs. D-Davis today?'' Bill then interrupted Eddie's thoughts, and the three boys turned to look at him. ''Yes, unfortunately, I don't know what I will say to Mrs. Davis though, it's going to be a nightmare.'' Richie and Mike looked at him with confused expression, but Eddie really didn't want to talk about his mother in front of strangers, so he ignored them. ''I-It'll be fine, just t-tell her something.''</p><p>''You are probably right, but...'' Eddie sighed. ''I'm going there tomorrow I hope she's hot, let me know Eds,'' Richie remarked, and Eddie glared at him. Eddie noticed that Bill glared at Richie as well. It seemed as if he had told him in advance not to make any inappropriate jokes in front of Eddie, and it seemed to help, but probably not completely, at least that was what Eddie thought it looked like. Mike just laughed at his remark. </p><p>''My apologies señor,'' Richie then apologized in a Spanish accent, and raised his hands in defense, just like he had done the first day they had met. Eddie didn’t know if he was apologizing to him or Bill. </p><p>Eddie decided to ignore him again, and didn't even look at him until they were about to leave the cafeteria. Richie hasn't said a word for the rest of the time. Eddie was little annoyed, but he expected it to be much worse. The worst part was that Bill looked like he liked Richie even more for some unknown reason. Eddie then said goodbye to everyone, and left for his next class.</p><p>When Eddie had AP Biology class with Stanley that day, he told him what had happened at lunch. Surprisingly, Mike was in the class with them as well. Eddie hadn’t notice that he had been there with them the previous week because they hadn't known each other before, but he was glad because he liked Mike.  </p><p>Eddie and Mike greeted each other before the lesson started, and Eddie briefly introduced Mike to Stan. It was the last lesson, so he was supposed to have the long-awaited consultation with the school counselor afterwards.</p><p>When the lesson was over, Eddie just took his things and headed towards Mrs. Davis' office. He was supposed to wait in front of Mr. Davis office, so he did as he was told. </p><p>After a few minutes of sitting there, Mrs. Davis opened the door, and motioned for him to come in and put his thing away. Then she told him to sit in a chair that was standing in front of her desk. Eddie sat down without a word while he was curiously looking at Mrs. Davis.  </p><p>''Welcome Eddie, my name is Charlie Davis…, call me Charlie,'' she smiled at him softly a continued, ''I haven't had the honor of meeting you yet.'' Eddie smiled at her as well, and nodded.</p><p>''As you probably know, every student who is in their final year of high school is required to pay me a visit; I need to make sure you know everything you need to know about college applications and SATs.'' Eddie nodded again absently. ''You are one of the best students we have here, so tell me Eddie, do you have any plans for the future? ''Charlie asked, still with a smile on her face.</p><p>Eddie lowered his head, ''I don't want to go to college, I'll stay here in Derry, I don't want to leave my mother,'' Eddie answered simply without looking at her. ''Is that really what you want?'' Charlie asked him honestly. Eddie hasn't seen her face, but he could tell she was confused by his answer, Eddie shrugged. </p><p>It was the truth, Eddie didn't know. He was determined to stay in Derry, but he wasn't sure if it was what he really wanted. Stan and Bill didn't know what they wanted to study, but they always knew they wanted to move out of Derry, and they knew they wanted to go to college. It wasn't that difficult for them as it was for Eddie. After a while, Eddie just nodded again.</p><p>Charlie looked at Eddie skeptically. ''Are you sure about that? Have you thought about what would you like to study if you went to college? You have great results from previous years and from SAT practice tests, and I think you have a potential to make it far, at least you should try it.'' Eddie really started thinking about it, but it was exactly what he didn't want to. </p><p>It was hard for him. Eddie knew he had a chance to get to college with his results. Although he had no plans to apply for any colleges, he had always prepared for STA tests as if he did. He even wondered what he would like study if he had the courage to leave his mother, but he wasn't sure. ''Not really.'' Instead of telling Charlie about his feelings, he answered easily, just like Bill told him. He just told her 'something’, and hopped she would leave him alone. </p><p>''I know you think you decided, but could at least do something for me?'' Eddie looked at her confused and waited for her to continue, ''can you think about it? I want you to try, and figure out what would you enjoy studying, and how do you see yourself in the years to come, okay?'' Eddie knew what that meant, that was exactly what he wanted to avoid. </p><p>''I would like to meet you again in exactly one month,'' Charlie added. Eddie wasn't too happy about it, but he told himself that he would try, and if he didn’t figure out, he would just told her 'something', and she would hopefully let him alone. </p><p>He planned on studying for SAT again anyway. It was no problem for him. They've been writing that test four times in one year, since Eddie was a freshman, and it's been very similar every year. The more students earned points, the more offers and opportunities they had.</p><p>''Okay," Eddie replied. Charlie then said goodbye to him, and Eddie left her office, and headed home.</p><p>Eddie was thinking about what Charlie would say in a month when he would tell her 'something' and about the lunch break. It really seemed like Richie was trying not to piss him off, and Eddie was actually happy about it. He even considered going to lunch with them again. </p><p>He wondered how he and his best friends had managed to be just by themselves all that time before. It was only their second week of senior year, and they have already made three other friends, four if Eddie counted Richie. It was weird to Eddie, but he was actually happy about it.</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. the second best thing you can do with your lips</h2></a>
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    <p>In the morning on Wednesday when Eddie arrived to school with Stan, he saw Bill for the first time since Eddie had been talking with him, Richie and Mike in the cafeteria. He admitted to him that it hadn't been so bad to talk to Richie after all, and Bill was happy about it.</p><p>After that brief conversation with Bill, something, Eddie had not expected, happened.</p><p>The first class Eddie had was an AP English Literature and Composition class that he had chosen at the end of the junior year. Eddie had chosen it because he knew it would not be harder than the regular English class because at that time he really hadn't planned to go to college, he still didn't.</p><p>When Eddie entered the classroom, the first person he saw was Greta Bowie. </p><p>Greta stood in the back of the classroom, leaning against one of the desks. She was wearing a very tight, bright pink dress and a denim jacket. Eddie could easily see her breasts peeking almost all the way out of her dress; however, it was clear that it was her intention. It was a terrible way to get attention in Eddie's opinion, but she clearly didn't mind. </p><p>There was a boy standing in front of Greta who was staring at her when she was talking to him, and the boy was none other than Richie. Eddie really thought he would not have another class with Richie, but fate has brought them together once again.</p><p>Few second later, Eddie noticed that Bev was sitting at the desk right in front of Richie's desk. Beverly was giving Richie and Greta disgusted look while she was looking at them. They were clearly flirting with each other. Then she turned her whole body to the opposite direction.</p><p>When Beverly turned around, she noticed that Eddie had entered the classroom. She smiled at him, and pointed to a seat in front of her that was empty. At that moment, Richie noticed Eddie as well, and stopped staring at Greta who was still talking to him and trying to get his attention. </p><p>Eddie wasn't happy that he was in class with Greta and Richie, but he was glad Bev was there. He didn't want to sit so close to Richie at first, but then he nodded, and headed towards the empty seat in front of Bev. Meanwhile Richie was still acting like he was listening to what Greta was telling him, but his eyes were on Eddie.</p><p>Before Eddie sat down, he had greeted Beverly, and she had greeted him enthusiastically as well. Then he took out all the things he needed, turned his back to Beverly and Richie, and sat down.</p><p>After a moment, the class began, and Eddie saw Greta heading back to her seat in the front of the classroom. When she came to her seat, she started telling something to one of her friends, who Eddie didn't know, while she was looking at the back of the classroom where Richie was. </p><p>When the teacher entered the classroom, she introduced herself as Mrs. Porthleigh, and started talking about the topics they were supposed to learn about that day.</p><p>Later when the class ended, Eddie realized that his assumptions were correct; the class didn't seem to be difficult. Eddie hadn't heard a word from Bev and Richie during the whole lesson, so he almost forgot they were sitting right behind him, so he simply got up, and left without a single glance at Bev or Richie which seemed rude, but he was shy and didn't even know how to approach Bev. Moreover, he still didn't want to talk to Richie, so he didn't want to risk it, and just left. He had two more classes before he was supposed to have a free period. </p><p>Eddie was planning to go to cafeteria that day, even though Bill, Stan and Ben weren't supposed to be there, he just hopped neither would Richie, so when the time for lunch came, Eddie headed for the cafeteria. He entered the room and didn't see anyone, so he simply decided to go get his meal. </p><p>When he took the tray with food, he noticed that Mike was sitting at one of the tables talking to the girl who had been in class with him that day. It was Greta's friend. </p><p>Eddie didn't know if it was a good idea to go and sit with Mike, but a moment later, he saw the girl kissing Mike tenderly, and then leaving the cafeteria. Mike was still sitting at the table, and Eddie decided to go to him after all.</p><p>Mike looked up, and smiled at Eddie, when he noticed him. Eddie greeted him, and asked him if he could sit at the table with him. Mike just smiled at him again, and nodded in response, and then motioned for him to sit down without a word.</p><p>Eddie turned his gaze towards the exit, where the girl went, and turned to Mike again. Mike noticed it and understood that Eddie was wondering about who that was. ''That was Sandy, we've been together since the end of the junior year,'' Mike explained, even though he hadn't had to tell Eddie anything, he still had told him. </p><p>Eddie nodded. ''I know, we had AP English class together few hours ago, she seems nice, I'm happy for you Mike.'' It was not true he hadn't known her name before, but he decided not push the conversation about her further because he didn't want to make feel Mike uncomfortable by talking about his girlfriend. Mike just smiled at him. </p><p>Eddie and Mike then proceeded to talk like they had known each other for years. It was weird, but Eddie felt great with him. It was mostly because Mike reminded him of Bill. He seemed to be very reasonable and friendly to everyone no matter who they were. They also had the same interests, such as sports. Eddie was sure he would get along with Mike easily. He felt like he could tell him anything already.</p><p>When Eddie finished school that day, he went home with Stan again. Along the way, they saw Richie's car again. However, that time he didn't honk at them, and he didn't stop either. At first, Eddie was afraid he would stop because he had offered him a ride, but Richie didn't stop, and kept driving. Eddie let out a sigh of relief, and kept on walking.</p><p>On Thursday, Eddie had AP English class as the day before which meant he was supposed to have that class with Richie and Bev again. </p><p>Before going to AP English class, Eddie had made plans with Ben to meet up, and then go to lunch with him after their classes, because they both had free period at the same time that day.</p><p>When the time for the AP English class came, Eddie entered the classroom and the sight hadn't changed much from the previous day. Greta was talking with Richie again, however, when Richie noticed Eddie, he immediately looked at him. Bev seemed to be already waiting for Eddie, and was already seated.</p><p>Eddie went to take the same seat as before, and greeted Bev. She greeted him right back. However, that time Eddie didn't ignore Richie; instead he was looking at him without any emotion on his face. Richie stopped talking to Greta, and smiled at Eddie when he noticed Eddie wasn't completely ignoring him. Greta then looked in the direction where Eddie was, and then gave Eddie a disgusted look as if Eddie was something or someone who absolutely disgusted her. </p><p>Few seconds later, she turned back to Richie, and started telling him something again. Richie turned to her with a distant expression, and said something to her. Greta then turned on her heel, and walked to Sandy, she seemed to be upset. </p><p>Bev watched what had happened with amusement on her face and Eddie was a little taken aback, but didn't think anything of it, he just sat down, and pretended he wasn't there again. He pulled out all the things he needed for the class, and waited for Mrs. Porthleigh to enter the classroom.</p><p>Eddie didn't understand why Sandy befriended Greta when she was dating one of the best people in school in Eddie's opinion, so he couldn't understand why she was spending time with someone as rude as Greta.</p><p>After a while, the lesson started. They wasn't doing anything interesting during the lesson that day, but ten minutes before the class was over, Bev tapped slightly on Eddie's shoulder. There was silence in the classroom and the teacher was writing on the blackboard, Eddie didn't turn around because he didn't want Mrs. Porthleigh to notice.</p><p>Mrs. Porthleigh seemed like a strict teacher. She must have been a teacher for a long time and must have had a lot of experience because she looked older than his own mother. She seemed to be even stricter than Mr. Carson. Eddie realized that it was the reason why Richie, who was normally always doing noise and spoke back to teachers when he shouldn't have, was silent.</p><p>After a while when Eddie felt like it was safe for him to turn around, he finally did turn around without a word, and gave Bev a questioning look. Bev held a piece of paper in her hand that she then handed quickly to Eddie with a smile. Eddie took it quickly, and turned back.</p><p>It was a small folded piece of paper and there was something written inside. Eddie had no idea what Bev wanted to tell him, but he was curious what it was, so he opened it, and read what was written there:</p><p>''I always wake up smiling, I think you should try that sometimes''</p><p>Eddie was confused at first, and then he realized. It wasn't Bev who had sent it to him, but Richie who sat behind her. Eddie didn't know what to do. He didn't want the teacher to catch him doing anything other than what he should have been doing, so he crumpled the paper, ignored what was written there, and continued writing his notes.</p><p>After a few minutes, Bev tapped him on the shoulder again. Eddie didn't turn this time, but he put his hand behind his back. He already knew what it was about he was sure that she didn't want to tell him anything, but it was Richie again. </p><p>Just how he expected, Bev handed him another piece of paper. Eddie quickly opened it, and that time it said:</p><p>''I bet smile is the second best thing you can do with your lips.''</p><p>Eddie blushed, and was even more confused than before. It definitely sounded like Richie was flirting with him. It took him by surprise, so he decided to react. </p><p>He didn't know what to do at first; he didn't know if he should turn around at Richie and look at him or write back. Finally, he decided to turn around because he didn't know how to respond to that. Eddie wasn't sure if Richie was flirting with him, it seemed that way, but Eddie was sure Richie liked girls, so why would he flirt with Eddie? Eddie thought it must have been another of his jokes. He came to the conclusion that Richie was just messing with him again, but he decided to turn around at him anyway.</p><p>When Eddie turned to Richie, who was obviously waiting for him to do that, Richie had a smirk on his face; however, Eddie just looked at him dumbly. </p><p>That was when Eddie realized he had made a big mistake because he had forgotten that he had had to be careful, so he had forgotten to check if the teacher hadn't been looking. He had gotten distracted.</p><p>Mrs. Porthleigh was checking if all the students were doing what they were supposed, so she had immediately noticed when Eddie was facing the other direction, and wasn't writing the notes.</p><p>''Mmmm... am I interrupting something here?'' She asked Eddie with sarcasm in her voice. Eddie turned back quickly, and shook his head. The whole class turned to look at him.</p><p>''If you are not interested in this class, you can easily exit the classroom, I do not need to have a slacker in my class,'' Mrs. Porhleigh said calmly, and then glared at him. After a few seconds, she turned back to the blackboard, and started writing again. Eddie was disappointed with himself after that. He was sure he would probably have a problem with that teacher from that day, or rather, she would have problem with him.</p><p>Surprisingly, he didn't blame Richie for what had happened. What bothered him more was that he didn't know what to think of Richie. He behaved really strangely towards him, and he realized he really would not be able to get rid of him easily.</p><p>When the lesson ended, Eddie was supposed to have a free period and lunch with Ben. He got up quickly as always, and headed for the cafeteria. </p><p>Along the way, someone caught with him. It was Bev. "I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have given you his notes," she said worriedly and honestly, "he's such an idiot sometimes," Bev added, and Richie walked past them. </p><p>Eddie didn't have time to say anything to her because the moment Richie had walked past them, Bev went after Richie. Eddie was grateful for her. Although he didn't blame either of them, he was glad that Bev cared. She seemed like she genuinely wanted to be friends with Eddie and cared about him.</p><p>Eddie then continued walking in the direction they did, but the two headed outside while Eddie headed to the cafeteria. Eddie thought they probably went for smoke. That also bothered him more than what had happened in that class. He hated when people were smoking. He didn't like watching people ruin their own health, especially like that, because it was the reason why his own father had died, and it didn't matter that it was Bev and the boy he didn't particularly liked who were smoking.</p><p>Instead of thinking about them, he stopped in front of the cafeteria, and waited for Ben to arrive. After a while, Ben showed up.</p><p>They entered the cafeteria together, took the trays with food, and sat down at one of the tables that were empty. They exchanged a few sentences, and after a while, Eddie saw Bev and Richie enter the cafeteria as well. Ben noticed them too, but because he was as shy as Eddie was, he didn't wave at them, and blushed instead when he noticed Bev. Ben hasn't met Richie yet, so he almost didn't notice him. </p><p>Bev took a look around the cafeteria, and started looking for an empty table where she and Richie could sit down. Then she noticed Eddie and Ben sitting at one of the tables. She said something quickly to Richie, and headed towards them with a smile on her face. Richie looked like he didn't want to follow her because he just stood there, however, after a while; he followed her with an absent expression on his face.</p><p>''Hi, I know you probably don't want to see us, Eddie, but can we sit here? There is not an empty table anymore, and I really do not want to sit with Greta.'' Bev asked Eddie, who was looking at her with absent expression just like Richie. Bev then glared at Richie, and Ben looked at all of them confused. ''Sure.''</p><p>Eddie didn't want to be rude and he enjoyed talking with Bev, he knew he could just ignore Richie. Bev turned back to Eddie, and sat down. Then she took her meal out of her backpack. Richie was still standing there looking like he was wondering if he should sit down or run away. Bev eyed him, and motioned for him to sit down next to her. It happened to be right across Eddie.</p><p>Richie then sat down absently, and looked Eddie straight in the eyes; however, he still said nothing. After a while, he took an apple from his backpack, and put it on the table. It was the first time; Eddie had seen that Richie had food with him. Ben, meanwhile, pulled something else out of his backpack, and blushed again. </p><p>''This is for you.'' It was a piece of paper. Ben handed it to Bev, looked down, and continued eating. Bev smiled at him, and then she read it just for herself, and her eyes lit up while she blushed too. </p><p>Eddie was sure it was one of the poems Ben had written. Eddie thought it was very romantic. Richie looked at both of them confused, but they ignored him. Bev quickly hid the paper with the poem in her pocket of the jacket she was wearing without a word. Eddie smiled at both of them, and gave Ben an encouraging look. Eddie was sure that he liked Bev from the day, they had first met. Bill liked Bev as well, but Eddie could tell it wasn't the way Ben did. It was almost like love at first sight for Ben.</p><p>After a while a voice pulled him out of his thoughts. "I'm sorry for earlier." Eddie was a little taken aback when he had heard those words, he didn't expect Richie to care or apologize to him. "It's not a big deal," Eddie said after a moment, and Richie smiled in response. </p><p>It wasn't like before when he had apologized for telling him an inappropriate joke, but it seemed more sincere. Then Eddie realized that Richie didn't really know Ben yet. ''Ben this is Richie, Richie this is Ben,'' he simply introduced them. Ben was busy thinking about Bev, and Richie felt guilty about earlier, so none of them introduced themselves.</p><p>After Richie and Ben shook hands, they exchanged a few more sentences. Bev joined the conversation, and Eddie was silent most of the time. However, during this short conversation, Eddie found out a lot of the things about Richie that he did not know about him. </p><p>"I was supposed to graduate last year, stuff got in a way, ya know... and now I'm retaking the senior year here," Richie said as if it wasn't a big deal. It probably wasn't, but Eddie was curious about those 'stuff that got in a way', but it was still too personal to ask. </p><p>When it was time to go, Eddie and Ben said goodbye to the others, and went to the class they had together.</p><p>Nothing interesting happened for the rest of the day. Eddie spent the afternoon with Stanley because Bill had a soccer practice again that day. Eddie told him about the lunch break, but he kept the notes Richie had sent him to himself. </p><p>He still didn't know why he had sent them to him. He guessed he really enjoyed making fun of him. Stanley told him that he had been in cafeteria with Mike, and that he really seemed like a great guy, it surprised Eddie because Stan didn't like anyone most of the time, but when Eddie thought about it later, it wasn't that surprising after all, it was Mike, who wouldn't like Mike. Stan also told him that he wanted to meet Ben, so Eddie promised to introduce him to Ben soon.</p><p>Later at home, Eddie's mother told him that they would go to see one of the last relatives he had left on Sunday. She was Eddie's grandmother's sister, whom he hated. She was worse than his mother, and she always blamed him for being too fragile and was calling him ‘girly’ all the time. Eddie didn't care about that, but she used it as an insult, so it wasn't nice.</p><p>His mother has always stood by him surprisingly, in fact, she didn't like her either, but it was her birthday on Sunday, so they had to go there. He wasn't looking forward to it at all, but he knew he had no choice, so he couldn't make any plans with Stanley or Bill for the weekend.</p><p>The next day it was finally Friday, and Eddie was glad that the week was finally over.  </p><p>He had a free period with Stanley that day, so he was glad he could go to lunch with him. Unfortunately, Ben didn't have a free period at the same time, so he couldn't introduce them to each other. Someone else had though. Unfortunately for Stan, it turned out that Bev had. Eddie had seen Beverly very often that week, but he didn't mind. </p><p>The moment the two boys saw Beverly enter the cafeteria, and head for the table where Stan and Eddie were sitting, Stanley rose from his seat, and was about to leave, he obviously didn't want to talk to her. He quickly said goodbye to Eddie, and left before Bev came to them.</p><p>''What was that about?'' Bev clearly knew that Stan left because of her, but she did not know why and she looked a little hurt. She sat down next to Eddie as if they had been friends for many years, and then looked at him confused. </p><p>"You have to give him some time," Eddie told her honestly. Stan clearly didn't like that Eddie and Bill were making new friends. Eddie was convinced that Stanley thought he was losing them, but he didn’t have to be scared of losing Eddie, he would never let that happen. </p><p>Later when Eddie and Bev started talking about boring things like school and food, Bev asked him a question: ''I wanted to ask you something... do you have time tomorrow?'' Bev asked with enthusiasm in her voice. Eddie was a little taken aback because the last thing he would have expect was Bev wanting to spend time with him outside of school.</p><p>''Yeah I guess, '' Eddie said simply and little surprised. ''I already asked Ben if he wants to go to see a movie with us... so I was hoping you would want go with us... I would like to get to know you and Ben better, what do you say?'' </p><p>''I don't want to interfere if you guys... you know.'' Eddie replied after a while awkwardly. ''Don't be silly,'' Bev blushed and then laughed, ''we are going as friends,'' she added. ''Okay, I just have to be home early, I'm going out of town on Sunday... but I will go.''</p><p>''Yeah no problem! We can go as soon as they open... around five?'' Bev asked. ''Ben told me he has time the whole day and so do I... and...,’’ she stopped and started thinking, ''yes, we will just adapt,'' she added.</p><p>Eddie felt good but also bad about it. He didn't want it to be awkward when only Bev and Ben were supposed to go, but he had no plans, and wanted to spend time with them outside of school as well. After all, Eddie knew that if Ben and Bev got together, Eddie would be happy. ''Okay, at five in the afternoon in front of Aladdin, yeah?'' Bev clapped her hands enthusiastically. ''Yes! Great!''</p><p>Then they said goodbye to each other, and Eddie left to go to the last class he had that week. He hadn't seen Stan or Bill for the rest of the day, so he couldn't tell them what his plans for Saturday were. Stanley went to a meeting with his 'bird club' that day, so he couldn't tell him on the way home either.</p><p>At home, he exchanged a few sentences with his mother when they had dinner, and prepared what he would wear the next day. He was nervous. He didn't know why, but at the same time, he was excited. He couldn't wait to spend more time with his new friends.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. hold me closer tiny dancer</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Eddie woke up in the morning quite early. He rubbed his eyes, put on his slippers, and went to the bathroom. His mother had fallen asleep on the couch in the living room the day before as usual, so he had to be quiet.</p><p>He brushed his teeth first, took a quick shower, and got dressed up. Although it would have taken a long time for Eddie to grow a beard, he had to shave already because he hated when he had only a few hairs on his chin. Then he left the bathroom, and headed to the kitchen to make himself a breakfast. </p><p>Eddie put cereals into a bowl, and poured milk over them. Then he drank a glass of water as he did every morning, and went to brush his teeth again. </p><p>When Eddie was younger, he had been carrying a toothbrush to school to brush his teeth after every meal. He had had a lot of habits like that. It was mainly because he hated the fact that there were germs everywhere. He had also been paranoid about getting sick because of it. </p><p>One day when he had been still attending the middle school, Vic Criss had seen him brushing his teeth in the school restroom, and laughed at him because kids normally hadn't done such things. After that, Eddie had always waited until he'd come home, and later when he had gotten older, he had stopped thinking about it that much.</p><p>His mother was asleep and snorting when Eddie was in the kitchen, so when Eddie was full, he decided to go to his room to do some homework for school. Later when his mother woke up, he went to do the laundry, and after that, he went to read one of the books he had borrowed from the local library.</p><p>After a few hours, he realized it was almost time to go to the town. He had said only a few words to his mother when he had been putting the laundry in the washing machine, but he had forgotten to mention that he was going out and would come home later in the evening, so he went to let her know.</p><p>He told her that he was going with Bill and Stan because he didn't want his mother to ask him unnecessary details about Ben and Bev, and eventually forbid him to go. </p><p>Eddie's mother didn't mind when she thought it was Bill and Stan with whom he was going to Aladdin. She just wanted Eddie to be home soon because they were going outside of town the next day, and Eddie agreed.</p><p>He went to prepare to his room. He only had a few minutes before he had to leave, so he quickly put on the clothes he had prepared in advance, and combed his hair. Then Eddie looked at himself in the mirror, and was satisfied with his reflection. He was wearing tight blue jeans, a white T-shirt and red windbreaker.</p><p>It was not a special outfit, but it was good enough. If Eddie could, he would adjust it by drawing a few interesting pictures on his pants or taking a nice pastel sweater instead, just to make the clothes he was wearing more interesting, but he didn't want to risk being called by an offensive slur again, so he had chosen a simple outfit instead. </p><p>After that, he took money and keys, put them in his pockets, and left for the cinema.</p><p>Aladdin was located near the Derry Mall which was in the city center where Eddie had met Richie on the first day of school, so it meant it was in the direction Richie's house was, so Eddie had to walk past it again, however, for the first time since Eddie had found out that Richie lived there, Eddie looked in the direction where the house was standing.</p><p>Eddie saw Richie's car parked in front of the garage, but the other wasn't there. He didn't see anyone in the garden of the house, not even in the window where he had seen Richie last time. Eddie guessed Richie was probably home alone. Then he turned his gaze back, and continued walking. </p><p>While he was walking to the city center, he was wondering how Richie had been spending time when he had lived in the capital. Did he also go to the cinema? Did he have many friends and had secret parties with them? Eddie was lost in his thoughts again.</p><p>After a few minutes of walking, Eddie found himself near the Aladdin. He was not sure if he wasn't late, but he hoped they wouldn't miss a movie because of him. He was a few feet away from Aladdin when he noticed Bev who was standing in front of the building where Eddie was heading.</p><p>Eddie came closer to her, and greeted her. Bev noticed him, and hugged him happily. She hadn't hugged him before, so Eddie was surprised when she had done it at that moment, however, he hugged her right back. ''Hi Eddie,'' she greeted him; ''you look great!'' Eddie blushed. </p><p>It left a smile on his face every time someone told him that he looked great, but it was even more special to him that time because it was Bev who had a great taste and fashion sense. In fact, she was wearing a really interesting outfit that day.  It looked pretty normal except for her pants. They looked almost like a normal high waisted blue jeans, but they only had one leg. The other leg looked as if it had been cut out of a different trousers and sewn to these. It looked really weird, but Eddie found it really interesting and unique. She was also wearing a very nice black hat. </p><p>''You look amazing too, i love the pants and the hat,'' Eddie told her genuinely. Bev smiled at him, ''I made those myself,'' she said proudly.</p><p>After a moment, Eddie noticed Ben who was coming out of the Aladdin's building. To Eddie's surprise, Ben was not alone. Richie was with him.</p><p>Ben looked very neat that day. He was wearing a shirt and nice pants that suited him very well. His hair was strangely, but nicely combed. As for Richie, for the first time since Eddie had known him, Richie wasn't wearing a Hawaiian shirt, but a T-shirt with a band, Eddie didn't recognize, and a denim jacket.</p><p>The two boys were smiling at Bev and Eddie as they leaving Aladdin's building.</p><p>''What is he doing here?'' Eddie pulled Bev closer to him, and whispered to her annoyed. Bev just smirked at him, turned away from him without a word, and Eddie realized that it must have been her plan all along.</p><p>''Hey, Eds,'' Richie greeted Eddie with a smile on his face. "Don't call me that," was Eddie's immediate response. He didn't understand why Richie couldn't call him "Eddie" like everyone else. Richie just gave him even bigger smile than before. 

</p><p>''Hi Eddie, they are only projecting three movies at this time, they are all relatively new,'' Ben said simply and interrupted their conversation. Before Eddie could say anything, Bev had spoken up: ''I want to see The Lion King, I saw the poster, and it's so cute!'' </p><p>''Jesus, you are such a kid,'' Richie remarked, and she glared at him in response. ''And what?'' It was obvious that she was not really offended, but she stood her ground.</p><p>''Let's watch The Mask with Jim Carrey, I've seen it back in Augusta, but it's funny, and the guy is genius, I'd love to see it again,'' Richie told them smugly.</p><p>''What is the third film?'' Eddie asked Ben after a while. ''Forrest Gump.'' Fortunately, Eddie had heard of all three movies, so he could choose according to his taste. ''Let's vote,'' Bev said with a smirk afterwards.</p><p>''Vote? Really? Come on Bev, grow up, I can’t…,''  Richie was probably just teasing Beverly, but it made Eddie mad for some reason because Richie always had to comment on everything and have the last word. ''Shut up, Richie!'' Eddie suddenly said, almost yelled. He didn't know where it had come from because he had never yelled at anyone like that before, not even at his mother, but he felt much better. </p><p>Eddie was always trying to be nice to everyone, sometimes way too nice, and he was rarely swearing, but Richie was pissing him off, so it felt really good to tell him to be quiet. The three looked at him in suprise, even Richie, and he didn't say a word after that.</p><p>''So... who wants to watch the Mask?'' Ben asked. Only Richie raised his hand, and looked at the rest of them hurt. ''Forrest Gump?'' Only Ben raised his hand. ''So it's decided,'' Richie sighed, Bev smirked at him, stuck her tongue out at him, and they went to buy tickets to The Lion King.</p><p>Richie offered to pay for all the tickets, but they all started protesting, so he eventually only bought his own. The movie was supposed to start in ten minutes, so they had decided to buy two boxes of popcorn before that.</p><p>Eddie wasn't thrilled that Richie was there with them, but he'd learned to ignore Richie's remarks and glances in those two weeks, and telling him to be quiet worked as well, so he knew that if it came to the worst, he would just tell him to shut up again.</p><p>When they entered the auditorium where they were supposed to take their seats, not many people were there. It was still relatively early, and people in Derry didn't go to the Aladdin that much. Mostly just kids and teenagers, when they were on the date, visited Aladdin. It was too expensive to go there often, so it was better to borrow a VHS tape with a movie from someone.</p><p>Eddie and the others were given seats at the back of the auditorium. As they were sitting down, Eddie quickly sat down next to Ben. He felt the closest to him. Bev sat down on the other side next to Ben, and unfortunately for Eddie, Richie sat down next to him. </p><p>When they were seated, Eddie noticed that Richie had a small box in his pocket; he pulled the box out, and opened it. Then he pulled the glasses; he wore a couple of times in front of Eddie, out of the box. Eddie realized that he probably had poor eyesight because Richie was wearing glasses occasionally, but he didn't understand why Richie wasn't wearing them to school, and for some reason he was almost always sitting in the back of the classroom. There was no way he could have seen what was written on the blackboard unless he had lenses.</p><p>Richie put his glasses on his face, and noticed that Eddie was looking at him, and Richie gave him a shy smile, however, they said nothing to each other, and the movie started. One box of popcorn they had bought ended up between Eddie and Richie and the other between Bev and Ben.</p><p>Nothing much happened during the time they were watching the movie. At one point, Eddie noticed that Ben and Bev were holding hands, but that was it. Richie had a few tacky remarks during the movie, but otherwise he looked like he liked the movie. After all, it was a Disney movie, who wouldn't like a Disney movie? At one point, Eddie even laughed at one of Richie’s jokes. Whether he wanted to or not, Richie could have been pretty hilarious sometimes.</p><p>After almost two hours, the movie ended, and the popcorn was almost gone. All four got up from their seats, and headed outside. Richie put his glasses to his pocket again.</p><p>Given the fact that the movie started after five o'clock in the afternoon, it was around seven o'clock in the evening, so it was getting dark and there weren't almost any people when they came outside. As soon as everyone left the Aladdin's building, Bev and Richie lit a cigarette.</p><p>''Do you have to do it now?'' Eddie asked annoyed. They both looked at him with a confused look, but said nothing, and continued walking towards the park with the statue of Paul Bunyan.</p><p>''Do you guys think I'm like Simba?'' Richie asked, and posed like a lion in the movie. It looked funny considering that Simba was a lion and Richie a human. Eddie didn't understand what the point of that question was, but he laughed at it just like Ben and Bev. "More like Scar," Bev remarked while she was still giggling, ''you know the dark hair, evil smile...''</p><p>"That works too... 'I'm surrounded by idiots'," Richie imitated Scar, and his voice sounded surprisingly a lot like Scar's voice. Everyone started laughing even more than before. Eddie had to admit that it was pretty hilarious. ''Very funny.''</p><p>''I think that more like Pumbaa,'' Eddie then remarked. Pumbaa wasn't a bad character, but it was still a farting pig, but when Eddie realized what he had said it was too late, even though he meant it as a joke.</p><p>''Is that what you think of me?'' Richie looked at him with a smirk on his face, instead of being hurt, so Eddie was glad he hadn't offended him, ''when I'm Pumbaa, you are Timon,'' Richie added, and started laughing from the top of his throat. Everyone did.</p><p>"'Let's dress in drag and dance hula-hula' then," Richie said just like Timon did in the movie. Eddie blushed a little at the idea, and then started laughing again while Richie started dancing hula-hula, or at least he tried, it didn't look like that at all though.</p><p>Eddie actually really enjoyed the time with them. He had to admit it was fun with Richie, but what he enjoyed the most was to argue with Richie because it was better than ignoring him, he felt like he got bolder and braver because of that, and that was a good feeling for Eddie. It was not really arguing though, they didn't mean it, but Eddie soon realized it was the best way how to talk to Richie. He didn't know anyone who talked to him that way, but it was fun.</p><p>Before Eddie told them he had to go home, Beverly had told them she had to go, so he was glad that he didn't have to explain to them what his mother was like and why he had to be home soon. Ben immediately offered to go with her. The two lived on the same side of town which was on the opposite side from Richie and Eddie, so Eddie knew he had no choice but to go home with Richie. He just hoped it would go as smoothly as it had gone before.</p><p>It was completely dark. There were almost no cars on the street and not a single soul left when Eddie and Richie said goodbye to Bev and Ben. They turned on their heels, and left hand in hand. Eddie smiled at them because he was happy for them. </p><p>At first, Eddie found it weird that the town was almost empty, but then he remembered that it was the day when most of the people in Derry went to the last basketball match before the New Year, which was held that day on the other side of town. Eddie nor Ben, Bev and Richie weren't interested in sports, so none of them minded missing the match that day. He didn't even know if Bill or Stan went there, but he was sure Bill did, it was a huge deal for people in Derry, so almost the whole town was there.</p><p>''Are ya coming?'' Richie asked after a while. Eddie was feeling weird about the whole situation. It wasn't exactly an awkward feeling, rather he didn't know how to talk to Richie, so he decided not to say anything, and just followed Richie when he started heading home.</p><p>Because the roads were empty, Richie started walking in the middle of the road when they had left the city center. Then he stopped, and was just standing in the middle of the road with a smirk on his face while he was looking at Eddie. It took Eddie only a few seconds when he realized someone was probably having a party nearby because he could hear music from the distance.</p><p>Eddie then looked at Richie confused, and he was actually little worried that a car would come, and hit him. ''Wanna dance with me?'' Richie asked him with a very serious expression on his face, then smiled, and held out his hand for Eddie to grab it just like at the festival.</p><p>''What?'' Eddie was shocked. Firstly, he didn't understand why Richie wanted to dance in the middle of a street with almost no music, and secondly, he didn't understand why he wanted to dance with a boy, more specifically Eddie. "Come on, don't be scared." Richie said when Eddie was looking at him with shocked expression on his face. He was still holding out his hand for Eddie. </p><p>''I'm not scared, but what happens when the car come?'' Eddie asked instead of rejecting him or grabbing his hand. ''We will die,'' Richie said with a serious expression on his face, but then he laughed, ''relax,'' he added. Eddie was staring at him the whole time, as if he couldn't believe his eyes.</p><p>Eddie still wasn't sure about what he should do, but it looked safe, so he came closer to Richie, and took his hand. Eddie didn't know what he was doing, if he was being honest. He had never done anything crazy, and being with Richie was like being on a roller coaster, he was afraid to get on, but when he got on, he enjoyed it more than he knew he would.</p><p>Richie placed one of Eddie's hands on his shoulder and the other in his hand. Eddie tried to be as far away from Richie's body as possible, not wanting to touch him because he knew that it would be awkward. Richie put his hand on Eddie's waist, and looked down at Eddie. He was looking into his eyes, and smiling at him. Then they started moving to the tunes of the music. </p><p>It was a slow pace, but it wasn't uncomfortable, so Eddie relaxed a little. Eddie really didn't know what he was doing and why at that moment, but he enjoyed it.</p><p>What put Eddie out of his thoughts was Richie again. He didn't say anything, but when the song playing in the distance ended, Richie started humming a melody of a different song. Eddie didn't know what song it was at first, but after a while, he recognized the song. It was one of Eddie's favorite songs by Elton John. He also knew the lyrics to that song very well, and could hear them in his head as Richie was humming the melody.</p><p>''Hold me closer tiny dancer<br/>
Count the headlights on the highway<br/>
Lay me down in sheets of linen<br/>
You had a busy day today''</p><p>Eddie guessed that Richie, either intentionally or not, was telling him to get closer to him, and Eddie did, but Richie hasn't stopped humming.</p><p>''And now she’s in me<br/>
Always with me,<br/>
tiny dancer in my hand''</p><p>Eddie didn't think Richie was the kind of person who was listening to Elton John, but he was a very famous singer, so it was understandable he knew the song.</p><p>''Hold me closer tiny dancer<br/>
Count the headlights on the highway<br/>
Lay me down in sheets of linen<br/>
You had a busy day today''</p><p>It was a special moment for Eddie, he felt like he was dreaming, but suddenly something happened. They were dancing together for only a few minutes, and somebody has interrupted them.</p><p>''Fuckin’ fags, what the fuck do you think you are doing here!'' A person standing nearby started yelling at them. The two boys turned around and immediately let go, and then they looked in the direction where the person was standing. Eddie realized who the person was right away. </p><p>It was Henry Bowers, and he was not alone. He could also see Victor Criss and few other men. After a moment, however, Eddie heard a very loud sound, and two hands pulled him to the side of the road.</p><p>It was a sound of a car that was honking at them, and if Richie hadn't had pulled him out of the way, it would have hit him. Then Richie grabbed his hand, and started running away while Eddie followed him. The car served well as a distraction to Henry and Victor, but unfortunately, Eddie was sure that Henry recognized him. The two was supposed to have a class together every week, so he didn't even want to think about what it was going to be like. He felt sick to his stomach.</p><p>They kept running until they reached the street where the two boys lived. Richie immediately let go of Eddie's hand, and gasped for breath. After a while, Richie started laughing. Eddie didn't know what hit him or what he was thinking at the time, but he started laughing as well, instead of being scared.</p><p>After that, Richie started heading towards his own house without a word. Eddie was about to say goodbye to Richie, but he kept on going, and didn't stop. Eddie realized Richie was heading to Eddie's house instead, so he followed and led the way because he assumed Richie still didn't know which house was the one where Eddie lived. </p><p>''Please be quiet, '' Eddie had told Richie a moment before he stopped in front of his own house. ''When am I not, Eds?'' Richie asked sarcastically knowing well enough he almost never was. Then Richie was just staring at the house in silence, but after a while he smiled. Eddie thought, it must have looked awfully small to Richie, but he didn't care about what Richie was thinking about him.</p><p>''If my mother hears you, she is gonna kill me, she doesn't know you.'' Eddie was dead serious, so Richie nodded. Then he held out his hand again, but that time not for Eddie to grab it, but to shake it as peace offering. Eddie thought it was silly, considering what had happened on that street.</p><p>He slapped him across the arm, and giggled softly. Richie made a hurt expression, but he understood. Instead, he saluted, turned on his heel, and started walking back to his house. Eddie just smiled to himself, and entered his own house. </p><p>His mother was sitting in front of the television waiting for him. Fortunately, she didn't seem to see or hear Richie. ''How come you are here this late, Eddie-bear? Do you know what time it is? You know we have to get up early tomorrow...'' Eddie rolled his eyes, but without her seeing him.</p><p>''I know, sorry Ma, I'm going to sleep, goodnight,'' Eddie just said, and headed to his room. He went to prepare for bed, as he did every night, and went to sleep. </p><p>It came as no surprise to him that he was thinking of Richie while he was falling asleep. The only difference was that that time the thoughts of him were good. He was thinking about them dancing in the street, and he still didn't understand. It was the most romantic thing he'd ever done, but he was sure it certainly didn't mean anything to Richie. How would a guy like Richie want to be with someone like Eddie? Or dance with a boy? He soon realized that he was getting his feelings attached, so he told himself it was just a stupid dance.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>LYRICS CREDIT:<br/>Tiny Dancer by Elton John - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYcyacLRPNs</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. crush</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was the third week in September and it was Monday once again.</p><p>The first thing that went through Eddie's mind that day was the memories of the time he had spent with Richie, Bev and Ben, especially, the ones with Richie. It was the first time he looked forward to seeing him at school.</p><p>Richie was still a person Eddie knew almost nothing about, but Eddie had known for sure that he wanted to find out what was hiding inside him. He still wasn't sure what Richie wanted from him, but he had never experienced what he had experienced that night. It was magical and adventurous, and Eddie was once again confused about everything.</p><p>At the same time, Eddie didn't want to have any hopes up or think about something that might never happen. After all, Richie was a boy he'd only met two weeks ago, and he'd still mostly talked to Eddie in a strange way. Whether it was flirting or messing around, it was strange and confusing.</p><p>Eddie was supposed to have an AP Psych class with him on Monday. He didn't really want to go to him and talk to him. He was too shy for that, but he was wondering how Richie would treat him after they had danced together. Eddie was aware that his thoughts and views on Richie had changed completely in only one day, but he was too hopeful to think clearly.</p><p>Eddie also almost forgot about Henry, rather he didn't want to think about him. He didn't even want to know what was going to happen after Henry would see him in a classroom or in the hallway which Eddie knew would definitely happen at some point. He just hopped nothing bad would happen.</p><p>When Eddie took a quick shower, brushed his teeth and changed from his pajamas, he headed for the kitchen for breakfast. His mother made him sandwiches for the breakfast and told him that she had to go to work early that day, so Eddie ate his breakfast alone, went to brush his teeth again, and went to school.</p><p>''We all have time off after school, so I was thinking.... I'd like to introduce you to Ben, he's a really great guy, what do you say?'' Eddie asked the two boys when Stan and Eddie arrived at school where they met Bill.</p><p>''Yeah sure,'' Stan said like it was not a big deal, in fact, it wasn't. ''I w-would like to meet him too, it's g-great idea,'' Bill replied with a smile on his face.</p><p>''So… as soon as we all finish, we'll meet up here... in front of the main entrance?'' Eddie asked again. ''Yes.'' Bill replied simply, and Stan just nodded. Then they split up and walked to the classrooms where they were supposed to have their first classes of the day.</p><p>Eddie had History class first which he had with Ben as always. He told Ben about his plan to meet up with Bill and Stan after school and introduce them, and Ben agreed and went along with the plan. Eddie could tell Ben was happy about it. He didn't have many friends, so he was grateful to Eddie. They also agreed to meet up the next day after school at Ben's house, and start working on their project because the project was due next week. </p><p>When the History class with Ben ended, Eddie was supposed to have another class, and then the AP Psych class with Richie. The time was running pretty fast, and during that class Eddie just tried to stay focused on the subject.</p><p>When the AP Psych class was supposed to start, Eddie entered the classroom and most of the students were already seated. Eddie looked around the classroom. He especially eyed the back of the classroom to make sure Richie was there, but he hasn't been there yet. Eddie didn't hesitate and took a seat in the front, pulled out his things, and waited for Richie to enter the classroom.</p><p>However, after a while, Mr. Carson entered the classroom, and the lesson started. Richie still hasn't shown up, but Eddie just thought he was probably late again, like last time.</p><p>When it's been almost half an hour into the lesson, Richie still hasn't shown up, so Eddie figured that he wasn't coming. At first, Eddie was checking if he would show up, but he eventually stopped, and started focusing on what Mr. Carson was saying to the students instead. Eddie thought that Richie was probably sick when he hadn't come in. </p><p>When the lesson ended, Eddie left the classroom, and headed to the cafeteria because he had a free period with Bill. Along the way, he wanted to stop at his locker and pick up his books for the other lessons he was supposed to have that day. When he stopped at his locker, he didn't notice anyone at first. He didn't expect to see a familiar face, but a few feet away stood a person he recognized right away.</p><p>Normally he wouldn't even notice the person standing there, because Eddie normally didn't pay any mind to people around him, but this person had headphones on his head and the music was playing so loud it could have been heard all over the main hall, and of course that it was Richie. </p><p>Eddie turned to him, but as soon as he did, Richie closed his locker, and started walking in the opposite direction without a single glance at Eddie. It was weird, but Eddie just guessed he didn't notice him, so he simply took his books out of his locker, locked the locker, and headed to cafeteria.</p><p>Lunch break went smoothly. Nothing special happened. Eddie told Bill that Ben had agreed to meet up with them after school and he also mentioned the day he had spent with Richie, Bev and Ben, so Bill was naturally glad that Eddie was spending more time with Bev and Richie. </p><p>When the two boys where finished with their meal, they were supposed to have a few more classes, so they split up again, and Eddie headed to the classroom where he was supposed to have another lesson.</p><p>The moment Eddie's last lesson was finally over, Eddie got up, and headed to the place where he had agreed to meet up with Ben at first, and then they walked together towards the main entrance where they were supposed to meet up with Stan and Bill.</p><p>When they came out of the main entrance, they looked around to see if Stan or Bill was there, but neither had arrived yet. Instead, they noticed other familiar face huffing smoke from a cigarette a few feet away from them. Ben immediately smiled and waved in the direction she was standing. It was Bev, and it was not a surprise that Ben was glad to see her. Bev smiled at both boys, put down the cigarette, and approached them.</p><p>At the same moment, Stan come out of the main entrance, and took a look at the others standing in front of the school. Stan had a strange expression on his face; he probably didn't know how to behave. He clearly wanted to make a good impression at Ben and didn't want him to think Stan didn't like him, but that was exactly what Stan wanted Bev to think, however, before he could react in any way, Bev looked at Ben lovingly, and Stanley noticed that. His face eventually softened, so he approached them with a smile.</p><p>It was only one glance and Stan knew that Bev liked Ben and not Bill, so he clearly didn't mind that he was there anymore. Eddie was confused about the whole situation. Everything changed in a few seconds, and when he realized, he was glad it happened. He found it really strange how people's views on other people could change so quickly.</p><p>Bev then hugged Ben first when she approached them, and then Eddie. It seemed like she was wondering if she should hug Stanley as well, even though they barely knew each other. They spoke about one sentence, since the day they had met. In the end, she decided not to hug him; instead she offered him a hand to shake. It was a peace offer, Eddie figured, but it seemed to work. Stan shook her hand, and smiled at her.</p><p>All of that happened without a single word, but they all said much more with their facial expressions than could be expressed in words.</p><p>A few seconds later, Eddie broke the silence. ''Hi Stan, this is Ben,'' Eddie said and looked at Stan, then he turned his gaze to Ben, ''Ben, this is one of my best friend Stan,'' Eddie said afterwards. Stan blushed, and held out his hand to Ben. ''Nice to meet you,'' Stan said simply. ''You too.'' Eddie just hopped they were going to get along.</p><p>Later, they exchanged a few words together, and then Eddie noticed two more figures that were walking towards them. Eddie knew immediately that it was Bill and Mike. He guessed they probably had had the last lesson together, so Mike came along with him.</p><p>All three boys and Bev turned in the direction they were coming from. Mike and Bill were smiling at them from the distance.</p><p>When Mike and Bill approached the others, the first person who spoke up, was Bev. ''Hi, we don't know each other yet, I'm Bev, '' Bev said with enthusiasm in her voice and hold out her hand to shake. ''I'm Mike, nice to meet you Bev, '' Mike said with a steady smile, and they shook hands just like Ben and Stan had done before. ''A-And I'm Bill,'' Bill said afterwards, and shook hands with Ben. ''Ben.'' </p><p>Eddie thought that it was quite an interesting and funny situation, given that he had never had more friends than Bill and Stan before. He was glad to have so many friends that year, even though it was his last. He just hoped the friendship with them would last.</p><p>Later, they all headed home while they started talking with each other. Bev went hand in hand with Ben and Bill at the same time. It seemed strange to Eddie, he realized Bev obviously didn't mind crossing the lines sometimes. Eddie liked her though. He had never had girlfriend before and Bev was a great. He just hoped she meant it with Ben because Ben was clearly captivated by her beauty, and every time he talked to her he had such a dumb expression on his face. Eddie knew he was in love.</p><p>Along the way Eddie said goodbye to each of them. The last one was Stan, and when the two boys said goodbye to each other, Eddie continued walking home.</p><p>When he reached the street where his house was standing, he looked to see if Richie's car was already in front of his house, but it wasn't there. Eddie then continued walking towards his house, wondering why Richie wasn't in the AP Psych class and where he was at that moment.</p><p>Teachers announced to students that day that the SAT test day was going to be in early October, and Eddie knew he had to start studying for it. It didn't matter to him that he didn't want to go to the college; he still wanted to have good results. He had plenty of time that day and had nothing else to do, so when he got home, he started studying.</p><p>The following day, Eddie was having lunch with Mike and Stan, and was glad they were already friends. Stan looked like he was happy for the first time since Eddie and Bill befriended new people. Eddie was also happy about that, but he hasn't seen Richie at school at all that day, so he spent most of the time wondering where he was.</p><p>Eddie had plans with Ben after school. They wanted to work on the project which had been assigned to them for the History class. They agreed in advance that they would wait for each other in the same place as the previous day, and then they would walk to Ben's house together, where they wanted to work on the project. </p><p>Eddie was looking forward to meeting Ben's mother and seeing where Ben lived. Ben had told Eddie about his mother a few days after they had met, unlike Eddie, who hadn't told him anything about his mother. He just didn't like to talk about her, even though Ben told him that he only lived with his mother, just like Eddie. It was another thing they had in common.</p><p>After the classes were over, the two boys were heading to the direction where Ben's house was. Ben lived near Derry Mall, almost in the city center, just like Beverly did, so they arrived in matter of minutes.</p><p>When they reached the house where Ben lived, the house was not bigger than the house where Eddie lived. It actually looked a little smaller. Eddie wanted to meet his mother, but Ben told him that she probably wouldn't be home from work yet, so he might meet her later.</p><p>Ben unlocked the door, the two boys entered a small hallway, and headed for a room that Eddie understood was Ben's room. After a few minutes they stated working on the project.</p><p>They worked for about an hour and were almost half done when they wanted to take a break. Ben offered Eddie something to eat and drink, and then went to the kitchen. After a while, he returned with a bowl of chopped apples and cookies. The two sat on the bed, and started eating the food Ben had prepared.</p><p>''Can I ask you something?'' Ben asked Eddie out of nowhere. ''Of course.'' Eddie nodded letting Ben know he could ask anything. </p><p>''Do you like somebody? I mean do you have a crush on someone?'' Ben asked with a smile on his face. Eddie turned red and didn't know how to react.</p><p>Eddie himself wasn't sure. Did he have crush on someone? He found a few boys, who were at school with him, attractive, but he would never say he had a crush on them, and even though Richie sometimes seemed to be flirting with him, he didn't feel like he had crush on Richie. </p><p>''No.'' Eddie answered simply after a while. He was no longer red after he had organized his thoughts in his head, and turned to look at Ben. ''Do you?'' Eddie asked, even though he knew Ben had.</p><p>That time, Ben turned red, and lowered his eyes. ''Maybe,'' Ben said quietly and turned his gaze to Eddie, ''I mean it’s pretty obvious, isn't it?'' Ben smiled at him, and Eddie just nodded. Then, they both laughed.</p><p>''I think I fell in love with her, the first day I saw her,'' Ben paused and smiled again, ''I know I almost don't know her, but I can't explain it, she's amazing,'' Ben added, and looked at Eddie hoping to find a sign of sympathy on his face. Eddie understood. He had never experienced anything like it, but he knew it was possible to fall in love with someone without knowing him properly; however, he was unsure of Bev intentions. Eddie didn't know if she felt the same way, he just hoped she wouldn't hurt Ben.</p><p>''I understand and I'm happy for you, I just hope she feels the same way, you know.'' Eddie wanted to be supportive, but he also wanted Ben to think rationally. ''I think so... I haven't told you this yet, but back then when we were going home from the Aladdin, we kissed,'' Ben told Eddie still with a smile on his face.</p><p>''Woah, why hadn't you told me before:'' Eddie looked at him amused, Ben laughed, and shrugged. ''I'm happy for you,'' Eddie then smiled at Ben. </p><p>After that, they finished eating quickly, and started working on the project again.</p><p>When it was time for Eddie to go home, they said goodbye to each other. They still weren't done with the project, so they agreed to meet up again on Saturday. Unfortunately, Eddie didn't meet Ben's mother that day, so he hoped to meet her on Saturday because they agreed to continue working on the project at Ben's house again.</p><p>The following morning, nothing special happened, just like most mornings. </p><p>When the time for an AP Psych class came, Eddie didn't know what to expect because he was supposed to see Richie that day. He didn't think much about what had happened on Saturday anymore, but the moment he realized he was supposed to have an AP Psych class again, it hit him again.</p><p>When Eddie entered the classroom, the class was still empty. Eddie sat down on his usual spot, and pulled out the things he needed for the class. Then he spent the time before the lesson started by looking at people who were entering the classroom.</p><p>It was almost time for the class to begin when Richie stepped in. The two boys locked eyes, and Eddie smiled at him, however, Richie didn't smile back; instead he looked away, and continued walking towards his own spot in the back of the classroom. </p><p>Eddie found it strange. Originally he wanted to give him his notes from the previous lesson, but he completely forgot about it after that. He was sure Richie must have seen him this time, so he didn't understand what exactly had happened. It wasn't typical Richie. Did Richie really start ignoring him? Eddie was confused. Was that another game of his?</p><p>Eddie rather decided to ignore what had happened. When Mr. Carson entered the classroom, he started making notes and listening to what Mr. Carson was explaining to his students. Richie didn't say a single word during the lesson which was also strange. Eddie really tried not to think about the boy who was siting not far from him and who danced with him on the street just a few days ago, but he couldn't stop wondering what had happened and why was Richie acting that way.</p><p>When the lesson was over, it was time for lunch again. Eddie headed for the cafeteria without a single glance at Richie. He knew that Richie had free period as well because it was exactly two weeks ago when he had first sat with him and the others at one of the tables, so he was just wondering if Richie would even come there after he had ignored him.</p><p>Eddie entered the cafeteria and Bill, Stan and Bev were already sitting at one of the tables. Eddie picked up his meal, and headed for the table where they were sitting. He greeted all his friends, and noticed that Stan was having a normal conversation with Bev. Eddie could see that Bev was happy about it. </p><p>Finally, Eddie sat down as well, and started eating while they all were talking with each other. Bev didn't mention anything about Richie, and Eddie didn't want to act like a stalker, so he didn't ask about him and where he was, instead, he continued eating, even though Richie has never come to cafeteria that day.</p><p>Nothing interesting happened for the rest of the day, but Eddie was still thinking about what had happened that morning and why Richie was acting so strangely.</p><p>On Thursday Eddie had lunch with Bev, she told him about the kiss she had given to Ben. He even met Henry in the hallway that day, but fortunately Henry just glared at him and that was it. Eddie was relieved because he knew what Henry was capable of and a glare was the bare minimum. </p><p>Unfortunately, Eddie was supposed to have a Chemistry class with Henry on Friday. He didn't know if it would be as easy as in the hallway when he would be in a classroom with him, however, he had to risk it because he didn't want to miss the lesson.</p><p>When Eddie woke up on Friday morning, he told himself that he would simply avoid Henry as much as possible and ignore him, just like he had done with Richie. He couldn't wait for school to be over that day because he was tired after the whole week of studying. </p><p>In the morning, he just exchanged a few words with his mother during breakfast, and left for school.</p><p>As he was walking past Richie's house, what he didn't expect was seeing someone opening the front door of the house where Richie lived. Eddie was still far away for anyone to notice him, so he stopped walking and waited while he was looking at the door. He didn't know if it was Richie or his parents. To his surprise, he saw a girl.</p><p>At first he didn't recognize the girl, and then it hit him right in the eyes.</p><p>Beverly was standing right in front of Richie's door and was about to leave. It looked like she had spent the night there. After a while, Richie came out of the door. Eddie saw that they both hugged, and Richie closed the door as soon as Bev left.</p><p>Eddie was confused. He didn't understand why Bev was with Richie that early in the morning. He knew they were good friends, but it was a school day. </p><p>Then it hit him again. It occurred to Eddie that there was probably something going on between them. Why else would Bev sleep over at his place?</p><p>A moment later, Eddie's confusion changed into anger. He didn't know what to think. Ben was in love with Bev and Richie knew it very well. Everybody could tell that he liked her a lot by the way he was looking at her and it was unmissable when they were holding hands at Aladdin. </p><p>It was an asshole move and Eddie was very upset by that. Not only was he angry with Bev for doing that to Ben, even though they weren't together, but also with Richie who acted like an asshole that was ignoring Eddie, and then had done that. </p><p>Eddie didn't understand how he could ever think Richie would be interested in him. He was sure it was just a game for Richie. He was playing with Eddie and all of his friends. He didn't care about the consequences and the potential disruption of their relationships.</p><p>After finding that out about them, he didn't want anything to do with Richie ever again nor did he want anything to do with Bev. The thought he had on the Monday morning about finding out what was hiding inside of Richie completely left his head.</p><p>All these feelings were going through his head and he was in a terrible mood for the rest of the day. He went back to hating Richie in matter of seconds.</p><p>In addition to all this, he had Chemistry class again that day, which he had with Henry and Dorsey.</p><p>When he entered the classroom later in the morning, where he was supposed to have a Chemistry class, he saw a familiar face first. It was Dorsey who was smiling at him just like he always did. Henry sat in the back of the classroom, but this time he was not playing with his knife and looking absently. He was glaring in the direction where Eddie was as soon as Eddie entered the classroom instead. He said nothing, but Eddie knew what he was thinking.</p><p>When the lesson was over, Eddie got up from his desk, and left the classroom as quickly as possible.</p><p>Eddie was supposed to have a free period after that lesson, so he headed for the cafeteria again. He entered the cafeteria and noticed Bev sitting at one of the tables. As soon as he saw her, he turned on his heel, and went to the opposite direction. He really didn't want to talk to Bev after what he saw when he was on his way to school. He didn't even mind being without lunch that day.</p><p>When the school was finally over, Eddie waited for Stan before the main entrance, and they started walking home together. Along the way, they agreed to go to the Barrens together the following day. Eddie was supposed to continue working on the project with Ben, so he told Stan that he would come later.</p><p>''You know, you should invite him to come to the Barrens with us when you're done, Ben is amazing,'' Stan suddenly told Eddie. Eddie was a little taken aback because it was their special place and they had never invited anyone there before. Not that they had had other friends before, but they still hadn't. </p><p>''Really? I mean of course, but what about Bill? Do you think he wouldn't mind?'' Eddie wanted to make sure Stanley wasn't joking and he didn't want to make Bill upset by bringing someone else there.</p><p>''If I don't mind, do you think Bill will?'' Stan said with smirk on his face. ''Fair point. '' They both laughed. Eddie was glad that Stan was finally getting along with others. On the other hand, Eddie wasn't sure if he wanted Stan to be friends with Bev anymore, but he was still happy for him.</p><p>The following day, Eddie rang the bell, and waited for Ben to open the door for him. To Eddie's surprise, the door was opened by a woman. Eddie figured it must have Ben's mother. ''Hello, I'm Eddie Kaspbrak, I came to see Ben, we're working on a history project,'' Eddie said shyly, and hold out his hand for her to shake.</p><p>''Oh! Hi Eddie, nice to meet you, I'm glad Ben has finally some friends in this town,'' she said happily, then they shook hands, and Ben's mom motioned for him to come inside. ''Ben is in his room.'' Ben's mom smiled at Eddie, and pointed to the direction where Ben's room was located.</p><p>When Eddie entered Ben's room, Ben was happy to see him. They greeted each other and continued working on their project. Eddie considered telling Ben about what he had seen in the morning of the previous day, but decided against it. He didn't want to upset him. Instead, he proposed the idea of going to the Barrens with Bill and Stan to Ben. Ben told him that he had nothing else to do and was happy to spend time with them.</p><p>After about an hour, they were done. Ben went to tell his mother that he would go out with Eddie. After she told him to have a great time, Ben and Eddie said goodbye to her, and left. </p><p>Eddie had a bike with him which he usually took with him when he was spending time in the town with his friends. Ben also took his bike and they both rode their bikes towards the Barrens.</p><p>When they reached the Barrens, Eddie's well-known place, they got off their bikes, and headed for the place where the three boys usually sat. Bill and Stan were sitting on a log as usual, waiting for Ben and Eddie to arrive.</p><p>The moment they noticed that Ben and Eddie had arrived, they greeted their friends. "I'm g-glad you came to see our special place, Ben." Bill said with a serious expression on his face, and then smiled at him. Stan rolled his eyes. </p><p>''Very special,'' Stan said with sarcasm in his voice. Bill glared at Stan, and Eddie just laughed at Stanley's remark because Eddie and Stan thought there was nothing special about that place, but Bill saw it differently.</p><p>''Thank you for inviting me here,'' Ben thanked them and sat down next to Stan on a log. Eddie was still standing, and noticed that they all could barely fit on the log. ''What k-kind of friends would w-we be if we didn't.''</p><p>''You know, if you want, I can help you to make it...,'' Ben stopped and started thinking, ''...when I was younger I was building sheds and other small houses for animals with my grandfather, maybe I could build something like that here, I know we are not little kids anymore, but it might come in handy.... or you know just for fun.'' </p><p>''That would be so cool! We w-would help you of course.'' Eddie could tell Bill was completely blown away by what Ben had told him. Stan smiled at Ben and said: '' That sounds great.'' Eddie agreed, and they spent the rest of the day planning what their club house would look like. </p><p>When it started getting dark, Eddie knew he had to go home, so his mother wouldn't freak out again. He said goodbye to everyone, and rode his bike home. On the way, he didn't even look at Richie's house. He didn't want to even think about Richie.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. boyfriend came to the rescue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Unfortunately for Eddie, he was supposed to have a Chemistry class with Henry and Dorsey on Monday again. </p><p>Eddie seriously considered that he wouldn’t go to school that. He didn't want to deal with anything. He didn't want to see Richie and Bev, and he definitely didn't want to see Henry.</p><p>Unfortunately, Eddie knew he had no choice if he didn't want to end up in the hospital with his mother who would drag him there because she would think he was sick. After remembering what it was like with her at home every time when he was sick, Eddie immediately changed his mind. Everything was better than that.</p><p>After Eddie arrived to school, he had a History class with Ben, so it lifted his spirits a little bit. They had already submitted their project, and Eddie hoped that the teacher would not want them to present their work. Fortunately, he didn't want to. </p><p>Later, when the lesson was over, he told Ben he wasn't going to lunch because he had to go to the library and didn't want to go there after school. Ben believed him. Eddie actually didn't want to go to cafeteria because Bev was supposed to be there again, but Eddie wanted to go to the library to return a book he had already read anyway, so it wasn't such a lie.</p><p>When he was on the way to the library, he needed to use the restroom. Eddie hated public restrooms, but he knew he had no choice sometimes. Fortunately, he carried a lot of wipes and everything he needed to wipe off all the bacteria and gems.</p><p>Eddie entered the restroom, and was glad that nobody was there. He didn't want to run into someone again who would laugh at him like Vic Criss did. </p><p>Shortly after he was done, the door opened, and someone stepped into the room. Eddie was washing his hands, so he turned around, and took a closer look at the person who entered the restroom. It was someone he really didn't want to see.</p><p>''No shit, look at that, the little fagbaby that ran away from me a week ago is here,'' Henry said, and smirked at Eddie, ''I couldn't even teach you how to properly behave, what a shame.'' </p><p>Eddie immediately froze and panicked. He looked like he was dying, the same way he had looked when he had been waiting in front of the Ferris wheel. Eddie said nothing, dried his hands, and tried to leave the room.</p><p>''Where you think you are going? I thought you might have learnt that from me over the years, but clearly not, maybe I should remind you.'' At that moment, Henry pulled out a knife, and put it in front of Eddie's face while he was still smirking at him. Eddie just stood there frozen not being able to say a word or call for help.</p><p>When Eddie saw that he was holding a knife in his hand, he immediately started to back away, still without a word. Henry took a few steps towards him, and took Eddie's hand roughly. </p><p>''I mi...'' Henry started talking, but he heard that the door opened. He stopped, and turned to look at who entered the restroom, but he didn't let go of Eddie.</p><p>''Let him go, asshole,'' Richie said while he was looking at Henry dangerously. Eddie had never seen an expression like that on Richie's face. Richie was almost as old as Henry, given the fact that he was older than Eddie and was retaking a senior year, but he was taller than Henry.</p><p>Henry was confused because he didn't know who Richie was at first, so he backed away. Then a grin returned to his face, and he squeezed Eddie even harder than before. Eddie cried out in pain.</p><p>''A little fag boy's boyfriend came to the rescue, how cute,'' Henry said with a smirk on his face. Henry, however, focused more on Richie at that moment, so Eddie had a chance to get out of his grasp. </p><p>Eddie tried to get out, but it didn’t work. Henry reacted by punching Eddie to his stomach. Eddie collapsed to the ground in pain. At that moment, however, Eddie saw Richie take Henry by the hem of his shirt, and pushed him against the wall. Richie started whispering something to his ear. Eddie couldn't hear what it was, but after a few seconds Henry started nodding, and ran out of the restroom. It all happened so fast.</p><p>Eddie sat down leaning his back against the wall. The punch didn't hurt so much. He was more shocked by what had happened, so he gasped for breath and felt how his chest was tightening. </p><p>Eddie immediately knew what was happening. He couldn't breathe because he was starting to have a panic attack or anxiety attack, he wasn't sure. He didn't really understand it himself. He thought that he must have been cursed because it started happening in Richie's presence and in the men's restrooms at school full of gems. </p><p>Richie immediately noticed that something was wrong, so he knelt down next to Eddie. He started asking him what was going on. Eddie just started looking for his inhaler in his backpack, and after a while when he found it, he put it to his mouth, pressed down, and breathed in. </p><p>Then he allowed medicine to go to his lungs. Even though he didn't need the medicine, it was not harmful and it always helped him to calm him down. After a few minutes, he started breathing normally. </p><p>Richie was watching him the whole time without a single word obviously not knowing what to do, but he looked worried.</p><p>''What just happened? Are you okay?'' Richie said with a worry still on his face. Eddie was mad at himself for allowing Richie to see him like that. He didn't want talk to him about it, even thought, he just probably saved his life. Eddie was also still mad at him and wanted to be alone after that. He just didn't want to deal with it and simply didn't want to see or talk to Richie. </p><p>''Yes, thank you, but you can go now. '' Eddie thanked him, but there was no sign of gratitude in his voice.</p><p>Richie understood. He just nodded, got up, turned on his heel, and headed for the door. Before he exited the restroom, he turned to look at Eddie once again. Eddie still saw a hint of worry on his face. ''Go to the school nurse. '' Richie said, and left.</p><p>Eddie didn't plan on going to the school nurse. He was used to take care of bruises and small injuries like that by himself. Not only he learnt how to take care of it, but he also learned how to hide it from his mother because he knew she would freak out. </p><p>Eddie sat there for almost ten minutes on the cold ground. He was still in shock, and fortunately, nobody entered the restroom during the time he had been sitting there. As he sat there, another thought flashed through his mind. He wondered why Richie was even there. Did he saw Henry go after him?</p><p>After a while, he decided to finally get up from the cold ground. When he got up, he adjusted himself in the mirror. He looked at where Henry held his hand and where he later punched him, the spots were both red. Eddie was sure he would have bruises there, and even if not, he was sure it would hurt for at least a few days.</p><p>Surprisingly, Henry was not in the classroom, where Eddie was supposed to have a Chemistry class right after that incident, so Eddie was relieved. </p><p>Unfortunately, he did not manage to go to the library. </p><p>On Tuesday, Eddie had a free period with Richie, but because he didn't want to face him after what had happened in the restrooms and he was still mad at him, he avoided lunch just like the previous week, however, unfortunately for Eddie, he saw Richie after that anyway. </p><p>It was in the main hall by the lockers again. He wasn't listening to music that time, but he had a bunch of girls around him again, and for some reason it made Eddie upset. </p><p>Eddie wasn't sure if he meant it with Bev or not, but he was flirting with other girls at that moment and it made Eddie even angrier than before. He obviously didn't care about Bev or Ben. </p><p>At some point, Eddie even though Richie had been flirting with him and for a second he believed he might have been interested in him, but Eddie realized that it must have been all just a joke. He was mad at himself for allowing that one evening, he had spent with him, affect his judgement. He realized he had been right the first day he had met him after all.</p><p>Eddie noticed that Greta was among the girls again, and then he noticed that among the girls standing there was also Sandy. Sandy was just leaning against one of the lockers, and watching what was happening there with an amused expression on her face. Eddie thought she was probably waiting for Greta. </p><p>After a few minutes, Eddie simply decided to ignore Richie, and walked down the hall without a single glance at him.</p><p>Eddie did not see Henry that day. All he saw was the injuries Henry had made turn purple, but Eddie knew they would be gone in a week. </p><p>The following day he had an AP English class with Richie and Bev after two weeks again, so he hopped neither of them would be present. </p><p>When Eddie woke up in the morning, he wasn't sure how to behave in the classroom. He thought the best tactic was to ignore them. He also thought that Richie must have been used to him ignoring him anyway. Bev wasn't used to it, but he really wasn't in the mood to talk to her, even after almost a week. Eddie knew she must have noticed he didn't want to talk to her, but he didn't want to explain anything to her either.</p><p>When Eddie met Stan and Bill that morning, he deliberately left a little earlier than normally, so he didn't even have a decent conversation with them. Instead, he went to the classroom where he was supposed to have an AP English class that day. He wanted to be there early enough to pretend he was busy when Richie and Beverly would get there. Eddie knew it was silly, but it was better than walking in and seeing them looking at him.</p><p>When Eddie got there, the classroom was still empty, so he sat down to his spot. Then he took one of the notebooks out of his backpack, and started working on the task they had due the next week. He was so busy that he didn't even notice when Bev had entered the classroom, and sat behind him. </p><p>When he raised his head to see if Mrs. Porthleigh entered the classroom, Eddie saw Richie in the door with Greta and Sandy instead. This time they weren't flirting, but rather talking. It seemed to Eddie that Richie knew every girl who was at school. Eddie understood why girls were interested in him; Richie was handsome, could flirt, and was charming, at least that was what Eddie thought. </p><p>When Richie noticed that Eddie was already sitting there, he looked him straight in the eye. It was only for a few seconds, and then just like the previous week he looked away, and continued walking to his seat in the back of the classroom where he usually sat. Then Mrs. Porthleigh entered the classroom, and the lesson started.</p><p>At one point, Bev was reciting something in front of the whole class, so she stood in front of the classroom directly in front of Eddie. When she was done, she smiled at Eddie and waited for him to smile back at her, but he didn't. He kept blaming her for whatever was going on between her and Richie. </p><p>Eddie was looking at her without a single emotion in his eyes and Bev was looking at him sadly, and while she was heading back to her seat, Eddie bowed his head unwilling to make any eye contact with her.</p><p>When the class was over, Eddie quickly packed up everything, and headed out of the classroom, so Bev wouldn't be able to catch him like she had two weeks ago.</p><p>A few hours later it was time for lunch again and since Eddie knew neither Richie nor Bev would be in the cafeteria at that time, he decided to go to there. </p><p>When Eddie entered the cafeteria, Mike was sitting at one of the tables alone. Sandy wasn't there with him that time, so Eddie quickly took the tray with food, and headed for the table where Mike was sitting.</p><p>''Hi Eddie, how are you doing?'' Mike said with a smile on his face, looking at Eddie, who had just sat down at the table. ''Fine, you know, busy with studying and stuff… you?'' </p><p>Eddie wasn't sure how he was feeling. The most accurate emotion would probably be ‘confused’, ‘disappointed’ or ’tired’, Eddie didn't know, but he didn't mention any of it to Mike, he didn't want to get unnecessary questions from him.</p><p>''Great, yeah I understand, SAT test day is coming up in two weeks,'' Mike said and nodded, then he continued eating his food. ''Yeah.'' Eddie started eating too.</p><p>''You know,… I wanted to invite you somewhere earlier, but I haven't had a chance yet,'' Mike started talking, and Eddie looked at him with confusion on his face, ''I got an idea... I wanted to invite all of you to my place this weekend, what do you say?'' Mike added still with a smile on his face. Eddie could tell that he wanted him there, he cared if he went.</p><p>''All of us?'' Eddie asked Mike. He didn't know if Mike meant him, Bill and Stan only or Ben, Bev and Richie as well.</p><p>''You know, you, Bill, Stan, Ben, Bev and Richie,... others have already said they would come, I'm sure one of them must have mentioned something to you, '' Mike said looking at Eddie in amusement. </p><p>The truth was, Eddie was avoiding almost everyone that week, whether intentionally or not. As a result, he did not know about this event. “Will you come?'' Mike added after a moment because Eddie didn't say anything.</p><p>Under normal circumstances, of course, he would have said yes, but he didn't like the idea of being there with Bev, Ben and Richie. The combination of the three wasn't exactly ideal, and he also didn't really want to be in a presence of Richie for more than he would like. </p><p>''I don't know I have to study.'' It was a dumb excuse, but Eddie couldn't come up with anything better at that time.</p><p>''No pressure.'' Mike shook his head, and smiled at him. Eddie thought he probably believed Eddie's excuse. "It's going to be from Saturday to Sunday, so you can let me know by Friday, if you are going, okay?'' Mike asked, and Eddie nodded, he was thankful.</p><p>"I'll be happy if you come through," Mike said at last with a smile again. Eddie just nodded again, and continued eating. He felt bad about turning him down.</p><p>Eddie actually hated how much his perception of Richie and Bev changed after he realized they were probably together. It was not surprising, but it was not right, and the worst thing about it was that Eddie just wished he didn’t know because he saw both of them in a different light because of it. It was ruining everything, but he couldn't just ignore it.</p><p>On Thursday, he had an AP English class with Richie and Bev again, but that time he completely ignored them. He didn't even look at them once, and he didn't talk to them, not once. Eddie thought they probably realized Eddie didn't want to talk to them.</p><p>Eddie and Richie had very strange relationship. They didn't know each other and they didn't talk for most of the time since they met, but there was still a strange tension between them. It was weird because at one point it was Eddie who ignored Richie, then a week passed and Richie started ignoring Eddie, and then it was Eddie again. Eddie was so confused about all of it, but he had enough of that at that point. He also didn't understand why he just couldn't stop noticing everything Richie was doing.</p><p>It was different with Bev. He liked her from the beginning, but he couldn't just forgive her for what she was doing to Ben while he didn't even know about it. Eddie thought about telling Ben or confronting Bev and telling her to stop, but he didn't have the courage to do so, so instead, he decided to stop talking to everyone.</p><p>Eddie was lucky that he was sitting in front of Richie and Bev in the classroom. He was glad he didn't have to look at any of them during the lesson. When the lesson was over, he left the classroom as quickly as before.</p><p>When he left the classroom, he saw that Ben was already waiting for him in front of the cafeteria, which was not far from the classroom where the class he had with Richie and Bev was taking place. Unfortunately, he was supposed to have lunch with Ben, but Bev and Richie had a free period as well. He couldn't risk going for lunch with them, so he started coming up with excuses to tell Ben again.</p><p>When Eddie approached Ben, he smiled at him. ''I need to go to the library right now, I have to return a book, I can't go to lunch with you,'' Eddie said not realizing he had said the same thing to Ben on Monday. Unfortunately, he didn't manage to go to the library on Monday, so it wasn't a lie after all. </p><p>''Again? Didn't you return the book on Monday? Eddie is something wrong? Are you avoiding me or someone else?'' Ben asked him so many questions that Eddie didn't know how to react.</p><p>''Of course I don't avoid you, this is another book,'' Eddie answered simply. It wasn't another book, but the fact that he didn't avoid Ben was true.</p><p>While Ben and Eddie were talking, Richie and Bev walked past them. Eddie knew they were heading outside for a smoke, as they always did. Eddie only saw their shadows while they walked past them, he could have told it was them by the look in Ben’s eyes.</p><p>Ben looked at him skeptically. ''Mike told me you aren't going to his place with us, why?'' Ben asked a little sadly.</p><p>''I have a plenty of work to do for school and SAT test day is coming up soon, I have to study.'' It was the same thing he said to Mike. It wasn't really a lie, however, Eddie still had plenty of time for studying, but he didn't know what else to tell him.</p><p>''You don't say, you're always studying, Eddie, please come, I'll miss you there, you can be my moral support, you know,'' Ben raised his eyebrows towards the direction where Bev and Richie went. He was pointing out that he wanted to have someone there who knew about his crush and kiss with Bev. Eddie understood, and suddenly he felt bad. He wanted to be there for him.</p><p>''I don’t know, okay maybe...,'' Eddie said after a while. After all, if Ben found out that Richie and Bev had a thing together, Eddie wanted to be there for him. ''Really?'' Ben asked happily. </p><p>''Yeah, I will go,'' Eddie finally told Ben because he wanted to be a good friend. Eddie decided that he would rather be a good friend to Ben and ignore Richie and possibly Bev than not being there for him and avoided potential conflict.</p><p>After a moment, Eddie turned to check to see if Richie and Bev were going back. When he saw Bev and Richie entering the building again, and heading to them, he told Ben he had to go, and left quickly before the two could reach him.</p><p>Eddie made it to the library that day and finally returned the book he wanted to return on Monday. He borrowed another, and headed back to school.</p><p>The next morning he got up a little nervous because he had to tell his mother that he wouldn't spend a night at home on Saturday. Of course, Eddie didn't want to tell her that he would sleep over at Mike's place, who lived on the other side of town and in a house he had never been to in his life, with six other people. His mother would never let him go and Eddie was sure she would tie him to his bed at home instead, it didn't matter he was almost eighteen years old, so he decided to tell her he would sleep at Stan's house.</p><p>Fortunately, his mom never called Stan's parents or Bill's parents to make sure he was really there, so Eddie was sure his mother would let him go, and she did.</p><p>When Eddie came to school, he didn't know exactly when and where he would tell Mike that he was coming to his place after all because they didn't have a class together that day and they didn't even have a free period at the same time. Fortunately, right after the first lesson, Eddie ran into Mike in the hallway when he went for the books he had stored in the locker.</p><p>''Hi Eddie, Ben told me you decided to come, that is amazing!'' Mike had a smile on his face as before. Eddie smiled at him back, but he wasn't so excited. He was glad to spend more time with Ben, Mike and his best friends, but that was it. Eddie was a little worried about how it would all turn out, but he was determined to go there. </p><p>''Yeah,'' Eddie finally said with a smile still on his face. ''Okay, I live in the south of town, just behind the Barrens, it would be great if you could meet up with Bill, and go together because he already knows the way.'' Eddie had no idea that Bill had visited Mike's house before, so he was surprised to hear that.</p><p>''Yeah, okay, I will ask him,'' Eddie finally answered him. Eddie knew where it was, but he wasn't sure which house was Mike's. He would rather go with someone who knows the way anyway.</p><p>''We'll sleep in the barn, so bring a sleeping bag, it will probably be cold at night, so wear something warm and of course hygiene supplies, but you probably know that, you don't need anything else with you.'' Eddie wasn't thrilled at the thought of sleeping in a barn on the ground, but he was used to it because when he was younger he and his best friends used to sleep on the ground in Bill's garden under the sky during the summer holidays when they were still at middle school all the time. </p><p>Instead of an answer, Eddie just nodded, and Mike continued: ''I told everyone to come around six in the evening, Bill knows, so just talk to him, but if you need to come later or sooner, it's not a problem.'' Mike looked really happy that Eddie decided to go. </p><p>"That sounds great, Mike, thank you for inviting me by the way," Eddie finally said because he realized that he hadn't really thanked Mike for inviting him, and had just rejected him before.</p><p>Mike just smiled at him again and said: ''Of course, I'm glad you're coming.''</p><p>After that, they both said goodbye, and went to their classes. He didn't see any of his friends for the rest of the day. Stan had his 'bird club' and Bill had to go to the Derry Mall with Georgie after school, so neither of them went home with him.</p><p>Eddie was imagining what would happen the following day, and he just hopped it wouldn’t be so bad. </p><p>He called Bill in the afternoon and they agreed to meet up on Saturday before going to Mike's farm. It was not a problem for Bill, they agreed to meet up around half past five in the afternoon in front of Bill's house with all their things, and ride their bikes to Mike.</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. hold on to me</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was a beautiful Saturday morning. It was a sunny day and it looked like it was still summer outside, even though it was the end of September. Eddie didn't get much sleep because he had been thinking late into the night about how that day would turn out.</p><p>Eddie had had plenty of hours before he was about to leave to Bill's house, so he had stayed in bed reading a comic book for at least one hour.</p><p>When he finally decided it was time to get out of bed, he got up, and headed to the bathroom in his pajamas. There he brushed his teeth, shave the minimum of hair he had on his chin, and then he went to make himself something for breakfast. </p><p>Eddie hoped his mother would be awake and breakfast would be ready on the table, but he was used to the fact that his mother slept late into the afternoon because she was watching the television late into the night, so he was the one who was usually making the breakfast at the weekends.</p><p>When he entered the kitchen, his mother was still asleep on the couch like he had predicted, so he decided to take only an apple because he wasn't in mood to cook that day, and went back to his room. After he had finished eating the apple, he started packing all sorts of things into his backpack.</p><p>After Eddie had packed everything he thought he would need, he went to take out his sleeping bag out of the closet. He has almost never used it, but it was still there. After a while, he went to choose the outfit he would wear that day.</p><p>Given the fact that he wasn't going to school, he could wear something he didn't normally wear, so he decided to wear light blue denim overalls. He decided against wearing them to school, even though they were very comfortable. He had small patches on them with various pictures that Eddie had made himself. He also chose a plain black-and-red T-shirt and a gray sweatshirt, even though it was warm outside. It was nothing special, but Eddie immediately felt more like himself.</p><p>After he got dressed, and put everything he needed into his backpack, he started working on the homework he was supposed to complete until Monday. In the meantime, his mother woke up, and asked him what he wanted for lunch.</p><p>Later when the lunch was ready, she called him, and they had a short conversation at the table. She told him to be home early and to be careful. She told him exactly the same thing every time he went somewhere, so he was used to it, and just nodded.</p><p>When it was time for him to leave, Eddie took all of the things he needed and prepared in advance, said goodbye to his mother, and went to take his bike out of the shed. Then he got on the bike, and headed towards the house where Bill lived. It was along the way to Mike.</p><p>He left the house after five in the afternoon, and was at Bill's place in less than ten minutes. He was there early, but he didn't mind, quite the opposite. Eddie preferred when he was everywhere earlier or in time. They had agreed that Eddie would wait for him in front of the house, so Eddie just waited outside for Bill to come out the door.</p><p>After a short period of time, Bill showed up. Instead of coming out of the door, he led his own bike out of the garden.</p><p>''Hi,'' Eddie said simply when he saw him, and smiled at him. Bill smiled at him right back. "Hi Edd-die" Bill said simply. Eddie hated when Bill stuttered his name, but he didn't want to upset Bill for doing so because it wasn’t his fault, so he decided against telling him.</p><p>Bill has had problems with speech since he was born. When the boys were still going to kindergarten, Eddie often had trouble understanding Bill. Later, The Bowers gang started bullying Bill in the middle school because of it, and when they started attending high school, Bill started visiting speech specialist who was helping to that day. Bill still could hardly say a sentence without a stutter, but he was getting better at it with time.</p><p>Bill approached Eddie, smiled at him again, and asked him: ''I know you have a lot of st-tuff on your mind r- right now with school and... everything, but I w-wanted to make sure you are okay Eddie, are you?'' Eddie was taken aback. Bill was looking at him with a concern on his face. </p><p>''I noticed you haven’t gone to lunch a c-couple of times, is everything okay? Are you not going to c-cafeteria because of Richie again?'' Bill continued before Eddie said anything.</p><p>Eddie smiled at him because Bill was worried about him and he wanted to reassure him that everything was fine. He didn't want to tell him that he was trying to avoid Richie again and Bev as well. </p><p>''No, everything is fine, don’t worry Bill.'' Bill was looking at Eddie skeptically, but then he got on his bike without another word, and Eddie did the same. Then they rode their bikes together towards Mike's farm.</p><p>They passed the Barrens on the way there, and after a few minutes they stopped at a place Eddie knew, but did not visit often. There were fewer houses than where Eddie lived and a few meadows and fields in the distance. Nearby was a forest that was right next to the Barrens.</p><p>Eddie knew that Henry Bowers also lived in that place which was the main reason he almost never visited that side of town. All the hairs on his body tingled at the memory of Henry. The bruises he had on his body since Monday almost faded.</p><p>Bill let the way to Mike’s place, so Eddie just followed him. Bill headed for one of the houses with a giant garden where two other small houses stood. Eddie guessed that one of the houses was the barn.</p><p>The whole lot was bounded by a fence, but the gate was open, so Eddie and Bill could easily get inside. Eddie and Bill got off their bikes, and left them at the gate. They took all the things they had, and started walking to the largest building on the property. Eddie guessed it was the house where Mike lived.</p><p>When they approached the house, Eddie noticed that there was a table with about ten chairs in the garden a few feet away from him. Four people were sitting at the table. Eddie immediately recognized that his best friend Stanley was there. He was passionately involved in a conversation with an older man. At first Eddie thought it was Mike's father, but the man looked older, so he guessed it was Mike's grandfather. </p><p>Mike was seated across from them, and a girl was sitting on his lap. Eddie didn't recognize her at first, but as he stepped closer he knew it was Sandy. Eddie didn't know Sandy would be there, so he was a little surprised. Bill looked as suprised as Eddie.</p><p>Sandy was beautiful just like Bev, but in a different way. In fact, she was the opposite of Bev. She wore more makeup than Bev and had medium-long curly blond hair. Eddie noticed that she had a different style than Bev, more girlish, but on that day she was just wearing a plain shirt and jeans.</p><p>As soon as Mike noticed them, he motioned for Sandy to stand up, and went to the two boys. Stan was still talking with Mike's grandfather and didn't even notice they arrived.</p><p>''Hey guys,'' Mike said with enthusiasm in his voice, and Sandy followed him. ''This is Sandy,'' Mike looked at Eddie who already knew who she was, ''my girlfriend,'' that time he looked at Bill, ''she has to leave in two hours, but I wanted you all to meet her.'' Sandy was looking at them a little smugly, just like Richie was at the day Eddie met him for the first time.</p><p>''Hi, nice to meet you,'' she said, shook hands with both boys, and the two introduced themselves. ''We are in class together, right?'' Sandy asked while she was looking Eddie straight in the eyes. ''Yeah, I know,'' Eddie replied simply.</p><p>''It’s so boring, and Mrs. Porthleigh is such a bitch,'' Sandy added. Eddie didn't think it was boring, but he agreed with the other part of her statement. Before he could say anything, Sandy continued: ''Is Richie coming?'' Sandy asked Mike, she obviously had no idea who would come. </p><p>At that moment, Stan approached them as well. ''Yes, unfortunately.'' Stanley heard her question and answered before anyone else could. Stan still despised Richie and wasn't happy that Mike invited him. Then they continued talking to each other as they sat down at a table where they met an elderly gentleman who was indeed Mike's grandfather.</p><p>After a few minutes, Mike's father also came out of the house and brought them something to eat. Mike's father and grandfather were both very similar to Mike and both were very kind. Eddie also found out that Sandy, not only had AP English class with Richie, Bev and him, but she also had Advanced Acting and Theater class with Richie and Bev.</p><p>It was quite hot day, so Eddie took off the sweatshirt he was wearing, and it was freeing for him. None of those present were looking at him strangely because of what he was wearing and there was hardly a reason why. Eddie was sometimes a little paranoid about that, mainly because of what was happening to him in the middle school. </p><p>After a few minutes, Mike's grandfather and father told them to be safe, to clean everything up the next day, and left them alone.</p><p>After a few more minutes, Eddie saw three more figures coming to the place where he and his friends along with Sandy were siting. Eddie immediately knew who it was. </p><p>Richie, Ben, and Beverly had several bags with them. Mike got up, and started walking towards them. Sandy and the three boys stayed siting at the table waiting for them to arrive. Eddie saw Mike talking to Richie about something and a few moments later Mike led him into the house. Ben and Bev were walking towards the table where the rest of them were sitting.</p><p>When Bev and Ben reached the table, they smiled at everyone. ''Richie and I got some alcohol for later,'' Bev said in a low voice. That surprised Eddie and the others judging by the expressions on their faces. Sandy was the only one who didn't look surprised.</p><p>Eddie had an alcohol only once in his life, when he was little, and his mother let him taste it to let him know how terrible it was. Not only Eddie did not like the taste of alcohol, but he also hated the negative effects it had on people. Eddie knew that drunken people were much more and easily involved in accidents and had more injuries or become addicted to it, so he had no desire to drink alcohol at all, however; he understood that people liked the feeling, especially because they could forget everything that bothered them. Only the consequences were often much worse.</p><p>Suddenly a moment later, Bill smiled at them, and looked excited. He had never drunk with Eddie and Stan, but he always wanted to participate in everything that seemed like fun and wanted to try new things. Stanley seemed to be as horrified as Eddie at first, but then smiled as well.</p><p>Sandy then started asking Bev what kind of alcohol they got, and the other boys said nothing considering alcohol, instead, they just greeted them. Eddie greeted Bev too at that time, and she smiled at him as if nothing happened.</p><p>Then Ben and Beverly took a seat at the table, and after a while Richie and Mike came to them. Richie greeted Sandy who came to him as soon as she saw him, and started talking to him about something. After a while, everyone else greeted him as well, expect for Stan and Eddie. Stan looked at him with a hostile expression again, and Eddie decided to just smile at him, but only slightly. Richie reacted the same way.</p><p>Then Richie and Sandy took seats opposite to Eddie, and continued talking. Bev was sitting right next to Eddie and Stanley was sitting on the other side of him. Everyone started talking, and Eddie zoned out for a moment because he noticed what Bev was wearing. </p><p>The whole outfit she was wearing intrigued him, however, he was most amazed by her earrings. It was as if she had made them herself because they looked like they were literal pieces of blue crayons. Eddie liked that. Her earrings matched her clothes beautifully. </p><p>After a moment, Bev realized that Eddie was looking at her, especially her earrings, so she interrupted the conversation with Ben, who was sitting next to her and was holding her hand, and turned to Eddie. "I made them myself, I love those patches on your overalls," Bev told Eddie and interrupted his thoughts, and Eddie blushed. </p><p>''That's cool, and yeah I made them myself too,'' Eddie replied, still blushing. He wanted to be nice to her that day and he didn't want to cause any problems, so he decided to talk to Bev and Richie as before, just for that day. Bev just smiled at him and said nothing.</p><p>As they both turned back to the others and wanted to join the conversation with others, Eddie noticed that Richie was looking at him. As they linked their eyes, Richie immediately turned his gaze to Sandy and Mike who had been talking to him. Eddie decided to ignore why Richie was staring at him like that again, and started talking with Stan.</p><p>After a while they all started talking about Homecoming dance which was supposed to take place the following weekend. Most people were usually not going there because it was boring and people in Derry usually decided to spend time somewhere else. Besides Eddie knew it would just make him anxious because he would have to dance with girls. It was enough for him to know that he would have to go to senior prom in April. As Eddie guessed, they all said they would pass and would not go. </p><p>After a few hours of sitting outside, talking, and eating food, it started getting dark. Sandy told everyone she had to leave and wished everyone a beautiful evening. Eddie didn't know what to think of her. He was little suspicious of her because she was talking more with Richie than with Mike for some reason. Eddie decided not to think much about it, and said goodbye to her along with everyone else.</p><p>As soon as she left, Mike announced that it was getting quite cold outside, so he urged everyone to move to the barn where they were supposed sleep.</p><p>Everyone took their belongings; Eddie put on a sweatshirt again, and followed Mike with others to the building that was located near the house. It was huge, smaller than the house Mike lived in, but almost as big as Eddie's house. </p><p>Inside was a blanket on the floor, like on a picnic, and in the middle of that blanket was a small table and pillows. Everyone put their things in the corner of the barn, and sat around the table. There was also a radio on the table. Mike turned it on as soon as they stepped inside.</p><p>When they all settled down and started talking again, Mike told them he was going for more food; he wanted to bring the alcohol he put in a fridge with Richie, and a few cups as well.</p><p>When Mike returned, he held a tray with food in one hand and the cups in the other. He put it on the table and said that he hadn't taken the alcohol because his hands had been full, so he wanted to come back for it. Eddie wanted to offer help to him, but Bev and Richie had offered to help him before he could have said anything. They didn't even give Mike a choice, they just said they would bring everything else, and left the barn. </p><p>After a few minutes, Eddie needed to use the bathroom since there was no bathroom in the barn. Mike told him where the bathroom in the house was, and after a few minutes Eddie left in the same direction as Richie and Bev.</p><p>When Eddie entered the house, he headed for the stairs as he was told. The nearest bathroom was upstairs. Eddie heard voices from the kitchen on his way up the stairs. He could tell the voices belonged to Richie and Bev. He didn't want to listen at first, but when Eddie was almost upstairs, he heard Richie raise his voice at Bev.</p><p>''I can’t Bev, okay!'' Eddie really didn't want to listen to someone else's conversation, but he couldn't overhear it, and he wanted to know if they were arguing or what was going on. He sat down on one of the steps, and listened. He didn't hear them very well. In fact, he only heard Richie because he still had his voice raised.</p><p>''I just can't let it go any further,'' Richie said with pain in his voice. He heard Bev answer him, but he didn't understand what she said. "I don't want to be that guy.... we are not good for each other." Eddie could tell that Richie was upset.</p><p>Eddie realized that they were probably talking about their relationship. He decided he would rather leave, stood up, and suddenly Richie said something that surprised him.</p><p>"I have never felt this way about anyone before, I don't know what to do," Richie said almost desperately. Eddie was surprised that he felt something like that for Bev, especially because they weren't very affectionate towards each other in front of the others. </p><p>Eddie thought it was probably because of Ben. He wasn't sure if Ben and Bev were dating because he hadn't talked to Ben much that week, but he thought so, depending on how they treated each other. </p><p>It made him even more upset than before. He didn't understand if Richie wanted to end it with Bev or if Bev wanted to end it with Ben from their conversation. Eddie just felt really bad and upset, even though it was not his place.</p><p>Eddie didn't want to know anything else about their relationship, and decided to better leave, so he finally went to the bathroom upstairs. He actually didn't even want to see them after that. It was terrible what they were doing and what was even worse was that Bev had to choose between Richie and Ben.</p><p>Eddie would never admit it to himself, but at the time, he was also hurt because he really thought for a moment that Richie might have been interested in him. It was just a spark of hope; or rather an idea, but he had still believed it for a short moment. For that, he was even angrier with Richie because he made Eddie believed it, but in reality Richie was interested in Bev that whole time.</p><p>When Eddie came down the stairs later, Bev and Richie were no longer in the house, so Eddie walked back to the barn. At first, Eddie wondered if they would notice that he wasn't there and that he might have heard them, but by the time he entered the barn door, they were all having fun and drinking their first shots of alcohol.</p><p>Bill noticed Eddie stepping into the barn first, and smiled at him. After a moment, Mike saw him, immediately called him, and motioned for him to come to him, so Eddie approached Mike. </p><p>''Come and have a drink with us, we already had one shot,'' Mike said with a smile on his face. It was true, he even noticed that Stan, who had said he would never drink alcohol in his life, had an empty glass in his hand, and waited for Mike to pour it for him again.</p><p>Eddie considered the options. Firstly, he didn't want to be the only one who wouldn't drink with the others; secondly, he never got drunk in his life. He also told himself that would gladly drink five liters of alcohol just to forget what he had heard inside the house, but if something happened or someone caught him drinking alcohol when he wasn't twenty one, his mother would kill him on spot, but despite all of that, he agreed.</p><p>Eddie nodded, and everyone looked at him. Everyone had a different expression on their faces. Bill and Stan were surprised because they both knew Eddie despised alcohol. Bev had a smirk on her face. Mike and Ben just seemed to be happy about it, and Richie had an absent expression on his face, but Eddie noticed a worry flashed though his eyes just like that day when he saved Eddie from Henry. </p><p>Eddie thought that he must have been very predictable because it seemed to him that Richie expected that Eddie either wouldn't want to drink at all or just little, but Eddie went all the way. He really wanted to forget what had happened just a few minutes before, not caring about how it would taste or what would alcohol do to him.</p><p>Eddie smiled just to himself, and waited for Mike to pour him a brown liquid. It looked like a whiskey, but Eddie didn't even ask because he didn't really care.</p><p>When everyone had their glasses full, Mike proposed a toast, just like a joke, and they all drank it quickly. At first it burned Eddie and he had the urge to throw up, but after a few seconds it warmed his stomach, and he immediately felt more calmed.</p><p>It went on like that for almost an hour. But not everyone got involved. Surprisingly, after about the second shot, Richie and Ben didn't want to drink any further. They all took turns in toasts that were completely ridiculous, but given their condition, it was hilarious. </p><p>Eddie gave Richie a few death stares during the toasts. He couldn't stand him, even though he tried to forget what he knew, he still couldn't. First Richie was looking at him with confusion on his face, but after a while he started ignoring him.</p><p>An hour passed when Eddie had five shots of alcohol in him, and he felt great. Ben, Bev, and Mike were already asleep on the floor in their sleeping bags and Stan and Bill were talking together about some ridiculous things because both of them were drunk. </p><p>Eddie was talking with them for a while, but when he saw that Bev fell asleep and Richie went outside, Eddie decided to go after him. He didn't know what he was doing and had a lot of courage at the time, given how much he had drunk. He didn't know what to say to Richie, but he just wanted to finally confront him, and tell him what he thought of him.</p><p>Eddie wasn't wearing a sweatshirt again while they were in the barn because he was feeling like he was burning inside from the alcohol, so when he stepped outside where it was already dark, he started shaking a little bit, but it didn't stop him. After a while, he got used to it, and headed in the direction Richie was going.</p><p>Eddie was glad he was walking somehow straight and didn't fall into a pit on the way after him. If he was sober, he would be worried about his health, but at that moment, he just didn't care. </p><p>After a moment, he stopped because he noticed that Richie was leaning against the fence, near a lamp by the fence, smoking a cigarette. It made Eddie even angrier when he saw that Richie was smoking. He didn't know why, but his emotions really controlled everything he was doing at that moment.</p><p>After a few seconds, Richie turned his gaze to the direction Eddie was coming from. Eddie didn't even know if he was looking at him, but he started talking not caring about anything. </p><p>''You’ r sucha asshole!'' Eddie shouted at him, and tried to take the cigarette, and throw it on the ground. Richie, however, stepped away from Eddie, and looked at him with a worry in his eyes again. </p><p>''Eds....'' Richie sighed. Before he could finish what he wanted to say. Eddie shouted at him again: ''Don’t call me that.'' Richie smiled to himself, and continued: ''You’re drunk, let’s go inside, you need to sleep this off,'' Richie said simply, and tried to lead Eddie away with a cigarette still in his hand.</p><p>However, Eddie was not over yet. ''Bev? How could you! I saw you the other day… Ben loves er… and…,'' Eddie did not know how to complete the sentence exactly.</p><p>''What are you talking about, Eds, let’s go... you are not thinking clearly, we can talk tomorrow,'' Richie said with confusion and sounded hurt. Then he threw away the cigarette, and started leading Eddie towards the barn. </p><p>Eddie pulled away from him, and continued. ''You r flirting with everyone, then yu want Bev and...  don’t get it..,'' Eddie said while he was looking at Richie with a frown on his face. Anger was radiating from him. Richie looked hurt, but Eddie didn't care. "I don't flirt with everyone," Richie finally replied.</p><p>''Yu flirt with me, it’s not fuckin funny,'' Eddie said, and fell to the ground. Instead of standing up after, he remained seated. ''Eds...,'' Richie sounded a little annoyed at that point, but Eddie still didn't care. He was just terribly irritated because of that nickname Richie kept calling him. ''I told you not to call me that, asshole!'' </p><p>''Come on... I don’t want you to regret this in the morning, I don’t care what you say to me, but I don’t want you to feel bad about it afterwards.'' Eddie didn't pay any mind to what Richie was saying because at that point he was suddenly falling asleep. ''I think I can’t...,'' Eddie said as he tried to stand up. He didn't even mind falling asleep there at that moment.</p><p>Richie took Eddie's arm, and put the arm on his own shoulders. Then he wrapped his arm around Eddie's back, and started leading him back into the barn. ''Come one... hold on to me.'' </p><p>They didn't say a word along the way, but Eddie couldn't stop thinking about Richie's arm wrapped around his back.</p><p>When they entered the barn, everyone was in their sleeping bags and asleep. Richie went to Eddie's stuff, but since he couldn't find Eddie's sweatshirt anywhere near him, he took off the jacket he was wearing, and put it around Eddie. Eddie took it without protest because he was almost asleep at that moment.</p><p>After a moment, Richie wrapped Eddie's sleeping bag around Eddie, and Eddie fell into a deep sleep, surrounded by the smell of cigarettes and cologne. It was smell of Richie.</p><p>The next morning, Eddie woke up with a terrible headache wondering where he was and what had happened. Then he realized.</p><p>There was nobody else in the barn when he woke up, just empty sleeping bags. Eddie slipped out of his own sleeping bag, and noticed that he was wearing someone else's jacket. Eddie knew it was Richie's. He didn't remember how it ended up on him, but he remembered that Richie was wearing it. He could smell Richie from it, just as he had when they danced together. It was a denim jacket, and it was much bigger on Eddie, so he looked almost like he was wearing a dress.</p><p>He had a terrible taste in his mouth and he was mad at himself for not brushing his teeth before falling asleep the previous night. He went through his stuff and found a toothbrush. He wanted to go to the bathroom to brush them.</p><p>Eddie tried to get up, but terrible pain shot through his head. He had to sit down again. After a few minutes, he got up, and headed out of the barn.  He expected everyone else to be outside, however, before he left, he realized what awaited him outside, and that was Richie. </p><p>Eddie remembered everything up to the moment when he fell to the ground. He'd never been more ashamed of something in his life. He treated Richie awfully. He was sure Richie must have hated him after what he had said to him, and told Bev about it. Eddie thought they were going to be mad at him, but as much as it would hurt him, he had every right to be mad at them for what they were doing. </p><p>Eddie was also confused and couldn't sort out his thoughts and feelings. He didn't know if it was because he had hangover or because he was simply confused about everything. He had almost admitted to Richie that he thought Richie would be interested in him for the millisecond, so he just hoped Richie didn't figure out. It was hard to say whether he did or not because Eddie didn't even know if he remembered everything. Eddie finally decided to go outside knowing he had no choice than face him and the others.</p><p>When he opened the door, the sun hit him in the eyes. It looked as if it was almost afternoon. The sun was high above the sky, shining directly into his eyes. Eddie's head ached again, but he didn't stop, and headed for the house.</p><p>He noticed a group of people sitting in the distance. They were sitting at the table where they all had been sitting before. They were eating breakfast or lunch, Eddie wasn't sure. He was glad he didn't see Mike's father or grandfather among them.  Surprisingly, he didn't see Richie either, so Eddie approached them. </p><p>''Well, guys look who decided to wake up,'' Stan said, and smirked at Eddie. He was in a suspiciously good mood. ''I don't think I'll ever drink again,'' Eddie said while he was sitting down at the table, and sighed. Everyone at the table started laughing. ''What?'' Eddie asked. He was a little irritated because he felt a little sick.</p><p>''Richie told us that you had pretty wild night yesterday,'' Bev said with a smirk on her face. Eddie figured that Richie probably hadn't told her that Eddie knew about them because she didn't seem to be upset or anything. He wondered what he had told them, but at the same time he didn't want to know.</p><p>"I don't want to talk about it," Eddie replied hoping Richie hadn't told them what Eddie was actually telling Richie, ''but unlike you, I didn't go to bed right after one shot…. where is he anyway?'' Eddie then asked out of sheer curiosity. He also wanted to give him his jacket back, which he was still wearing.</p><p>Bev and Bill looked at each other. ''He said he h-had to leave, he left about an hour ag-go,'' Bill then told him, and everyone started eating expect for Eddie.'' Take anything you want Eddie,'' Mike told him, and Eddie thanked him. </p><p>There were pancakes, waffles, eggs with bacon and toasts on the table. Eddie put one pancake on his plate, and started eating. He only took a few bites because he still felt sick. Instead, he went to brush his teeth, and started thinking about the situation he was in. He was quite glad Richie wasn't there, but he also wanted to know if Richie was mad at him or not, but what he knew was that he was terribly ashamed of what he had told him and how he had treated him. He knew he had to apologize.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. do not apologize</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Eddie was nervous. He wanted to talk to Richie, apologize to him, and he still had his jacket, so he wanted to return it to him.</p><p>In the morning he went to school with Stanley who was in a surprisingly good mood, given the fact that it was Monday. Eddie guessed he was probably glad their group of friends had grown that much.</p><p>Eddie was supposed to have two classes before an AP Psych class with Richie, so he tried to think about what he would say to him. He still felt bad for what he had told him on Saturday when he got drunk, he felt really ashamed of how he had behaved. At one point, he considered he wouldn't apologize so he wouldn't have to talk to him at all, but he knew he couldn't just leave it like that. He wasn't that kind of person. </p><p>When the time came and Eddie was supposed to have an AP Psych class, he still didn't know what to say to Richie, but he decided he would return the jacket he had tucked in his backpack first, and he would think of his apology after that. </p><p>Eddie entered the classroom and took a look around. Richie was sitting in the back of the classroom, as he always did. </p><p>When Richie noticed that Eddie had entered the classroom, he smiled softly at him. Eddie didn't expect that, he thought Richie would be mad at him for what he had told him. He was so surprised by his reaction to seeing Eddie that he stopped walking and suddenly didn't know what to do.</p><p>Instead of going to Richie, returning his jacket, and apologizing, he went to sit down on his spot. Eddie cursed himself for not being brave enough to go to Richie, but he knew he would still have plenty of opportunities to do so. The lesson started a few minutes later and Eddie was still thinking about what he should do.</p><p>Eddie didn't turn around to Richie during the whole lesson, but he heard Richie talking and joking around. Mr. Carson warned Richie each time, but he never punished him for talking. Eddie thought that Richie probably didn't want to get an extra homework, so every time Mr. Carson warned him, he just stopped talking for a few minutes. </p><p>When the lesson was over, Eddie left the room among the first who left, but instead of going to the cafeteria, he stopped near the door of the classroom where he was waiting for Richie to come out of the door as well. Richie was taking his time because almost every other student had left and Richie still hasn't left the classroom.</p><p>After a while, Richie came out of the door with the teacher. Mr. Carson was talking to him about something as they were walking together, so Eddie reconsidered his options because he didn't want to interrupt them. </p><p>Eddie quickly decided he'd better leave and talk to Richie some other time. However, Richie saw Eddie standing there waiting for him, so he quickly told Mr. Carson something, and Mr. Carson left in a different direction than where Eddie was still standing. </p><p>When some time has passed, Richie was still standing in front of the classroom smirking at Eddie while Eddie was still awkwardly standing in the same place not knowing what to do. Instead of going to Richie, he started taking Richie's jacket out of his backpack. Then he went towards him while he looked like he was about to faint. </p><p>''Hi Eds,'' Richie said with a smirk on his face and took a look at his own jacket that Eddie was holding in his hand. </p><p>"I couldn't give it to you on Saturday, so here you go… and thank you," Eddie blushed when he remembered why Richie had lent him the jacket in the first place.</p><p>Richie was trying to take the jacket from him, and their fingers touched. It wasn't the first time Eddie has touched Richie's hand, but this time it was different. It was as if electricity was flowing between the two and connecting them. At that moment, Eddie was completely red in the face while he was trying to find the right words to apologize to Richie. </p><p>''It was nothing at all, I was happy to help; I didn't want you to freeze to death there, candy cheeks.'' Eddie remembered the nickname Richie had given him the first day they had met by which he had just called him, so he knew Richie has definitely noticed how red he was. He wanted to scold Richie for calling him that way, but he knew he wasn't in a position to do so at the time.</p><p>''I want to apologize for what I had told you that night, it was rude and I didn't mean it and…. I just... I'm sorry... I don't think I should never drink again.'' Eddie stopped being so red when he got it out. It was humiliating for him, but he knew he had to apologize.</p><p>Richie was no longer looking at him with a smirk on his face. His expression changed. He looked like was dead serious. ''Do not apologize, I don't even remember it, it's not a big deal, okay?'' </p><p>Eddie was glad Richie didn't take it very seriously and wasn't mad at him. He wasn't sure if Richie said it just because he didn't want to talk about it or didn't really remember it, either way Eddie was glad he wasn't mad, so he nodded and smiled slightly at him.</p><p>''I have to go to lunch and you probably have a class right now, so… bye.'' Eddie added quietly. He turned on his heel, and started walking to the cafeteria without a single glance at Richie who didn't follow him, but Eddie was sure he was still standing there watching him.</p><p>Nothing much happened at lunch and in the following hours. The lessons Eddie had been boring. The teachers reminded the students that they had to study for the SATs which they were taking in a week. Eddie didn't study much because he was constantly thinking about something his friends and Richie, so he planned to study the whole weekend. He was sure that his friends would be studying as well, given that they wanted to go to college.</p><p>After school, he was supposed to meet up with Stanley, as usual, but when he came out of school, Stan was standing there with Beverly. The two were talking to each other as if they had been friends for years. Eddie was still mad at Beverly, but it got easier for him to talk to her after that night at Mike's place.</p><p>When they noticed that Eddie was heading towards them, they both looked at him. Eddie expected them to smile at him, but Beverly was glaring at him instead. Stanley smiled slightly, turned on his heel, and left.</p><p>Eddie was confused at first, but then he realized what had probably happened. Richie wasn't mad at him, but Eddie realized he must have told Beverly how Eddie had been yelling at him on Saturday when he had gotten drunk. Eddie wasn't thrilled with how he had confronted him, but on the other hand, he was glad he had told him what he thought of him and Bev. </p><p>The only thing he didn't understand was why Bev seemed to be so angry with him. Eddie thought it was probably because he had yelled at Richie, instead of talking to him rationally, but he wasn’t sure.</p><p>When Eddie approached her, he realized that she probably wanted to talk, and that was why Stan went home without him. ''Hey, can we talk?'' Bev said with an angry expression on her face. Even her voice was rough; she had never spoken to him in that tone before. Eddie was a little scared of what she would tell him, but he still knew he had the right to call them out, so he just nodded, and followed her.</p><p>Beverly was leading him to a bench in the park opposite to the school. As they sat down, Eddie looked at her in confusion. ''Richie didn't want me to tell you this but, '' Beverly started talking and Eddie was just looking dumbly, ''he told me how you yelled at him on Saturday,'' Beverly sighed, she sounded upset, but continued, ''but I have to tell you this because he's an idiot, and he'll never tell you himself,'' Beverly added. Eddie was even more confused. He wanted to say something, but he didn't know what, so he just waited for Beverly to continue what she wanted to tell him.</p><p>''I don't understand why you think Richie and I have something together, but it's not true... at first I thought you didn't want to talk to me because Richie was there and he could be a dick sometimes, but now I know it wasn't because of him, was it?'' Eddie was still looking at her dumbly, but his expression quickly changed to irritation; he couldn't believe what she was telling him.</p><p>''I saw you… when you were leaving his house in the morning, and I heard you talking when we were at Mike's...,'' Eddie sounded upset as well. ''I don't understand how you could have done this to Ben… he likes you, why are you doing this when you really want to be with Richie, it's not fair," Eddie continued and the anger was radiating from him. That time, Bev looked at him confused.</p><p>After a moment, her expression changed, and she smiled to herself. Eddie didn't understand what was so funny about that situation and wanted to tell her more, but Beverly continued talking before he could. ''I get it now... gee Eddie, you both are....'' Beverly laughed that time. </p><p>Eddie was outraged. He still didn't understand what Beverly was talking about. He didn't understand why the situation seemed funny to her. Bev then stopped laughing and looked him with sad eyes. ''Okay, I'll tell you something almost nobody knows... you have to understand that Richie and I have nothing together,'' </p><p>''When I was little, my mother died… since then, I only lived with my father… my father is not a bad person, but sometimes when he has a bad day he drinks, so he gets drunk most of the time... and then he gets quite violent and yells at everyone around him… I have already learned what to do whenever this happens... I usually go out until he sobers up or pass out... and that night when I was at Richie's, he was drinking again." Eddie was very confused by what she was telling him, but he kept listening.</p><p>''Before I met you all, I hadn't had many friends and I hadn't known where to go, so I slept outside or didn't sleep at all.... but that night… I thought of going to the only person I knew who won't turn me down… and that was Richie.'' Beverly sighed. Eddie was shocked. Not just because of what her father has been doing to Bev, but also because everything he thought about Bev and Richie wasn't true. </p><p>''I'm so sorry,'' Eddie said quietly after a while and felt ashamed even more than before. Beverly looked at him sadly. </p><p>Then Eddie realized that he still didn't understand what the conversation they had at Mike's place was about. It still didn't make sense to him. ''What were you talking about at Mike's then?'' Eddie looked at Bev still confused, and Bev just sighed again.</p><p>''It's not my place to talk to you about it, but you have to believe me, Eddie, it had nothing to do with me, okay? I swear.'' Bev sounded like she was genuine.</p><p>''You know, it hurts when you think that about me... Ben and I are dating now, we got together after we left Mike's farm, you know? I would never do this to him, I swear... Richie is a good guy, but he's more like a brother to me.'' Eddie started feeling really bad again. </p><p>''I trust you; please forgive me, I didn’t mean… Richie always flirts with all those girls at school… and you two are really close... I just thought… you know.'' Eddie refused to look at Beverly, he was looking at the ground instead, ''and I'm glad you and Ben are finally together.'' Eddie raised his head, and Bev smiled at him, but then her smile faded again.</p><p>''You know, this isn't the first time someone thought this of me, when I was in middle school, Greta Bowie told everyone at school that I had sex with every guy who were at school, I was eleven at the time and it was clear that it was not true, but no one has looked at me the same since then and no one wanted to be friends with me.'' </p><p>Eddie thought Beverly’s name was familiar when she first introduced herself to him, but he didn't connect the dots. At that point, he remembered. Everyone was talking about it at the time, it was terrible. Eddie was never interested in gossips and he has never really believed them, but he remembered that clearly. </p><p>He felt even worse for what he had thought of her after remembering that, but instead of telling her and apologizing again, he decided to do something else. Eddie moved closer to her, and wrapped his arms around her. Beverly was taken aback at first, but then she reacted, and hugged him back. ''Thank you,'' Bev whispered.</p><p>After a moment, they let go of each. ''You know, I've noticed that you like fashion, you always look at clothes I made, so I got an idea..., Bev smirked at him, ''as you know, it's Halloween at the end of the month and I've already talked with others about it....I want to help them to make their costumes... do you want to help me?'' Bev smiled again, and looked Eddie straight in the eyes. Eddie smiled back and started blushing. He didn't know at first if it was the best idea, but he knew he would enjoy it.</p><p>''I'd love to if you really want me there... you know, after I completely ruined everything.'' Eddie was mad at himself, but Bev just laughed. ''Shut up, it was just a misunderstanding, I've already forgot about it.'' Bev laughed at him, and Eddie was glad she, just like Richie, didn't take his words and actions too seriously.</p><p>''Do you know what kind of costume you want this year? I mean, who do you wanna be for Halloween?‘’ Bev asked enthusiastically. ’’I didn’t want to go trick-or-treating this year, but if you are planning to go, I'll think about it.‘’</p><p>''Okay, great, think about it, we have to work on those costumes... I know we're all going to study for SAT's this weekend, so... do you have time next weekend?'' Bev asked Eddie and smiled at him warmly again.  </p><p>''Yeah, I guess... that sounds great,'' Eddie said after a few seconds. ''Okay, I'll give you my number,'' Bev pullet a piece of paper and a pen from her backpack, and started writing, ''here, so... give me a call, and we'll plan the details, just don't call in the evening, I don't want my father to pick it up.‘’ Bev handed him the piece of paper, and Eddie took it. ''Okay, thank you.''</p><p>They said goodbye after a few minutes, and they both left home. Eddie was thinking about everything Beverly had told him for the rest of the day. It was a lot and it completely changed his perception of Beverly and Richie again. </p><p>Eddie was so sure they had something together, and it blinded him; he didn't even consider they were actually just friends. He felt terribly guilty and not only for thinking that, but for treating them terribly because of it. </p><p>Eddie hated himself for judging people so quickly. He said to himself that he needed to change that about himself, he didn't want to treat anyone the way he treated Bev and Richie, ever again.</p><p>At home, he thought about how to make it up to them. He wanted to be nice to them, more than he had ever been before. Not just because he felt guilty, but because they deserved it. Eddie also realized that Richie was actually a really good guy, even though; it didn't look like that at first at all. He was sure that not everyone would help Bev and not everyone would still treat Eddie nicely after what Eddie had done, and Eddie admired him for it.</p><p>While he was thinking about all of that, he pulled out a textbook, and tried to study for STA. Unfortunately, given the new information that was running through his head, he didn't learn much.</p><p>When Eddie was having an AP Psych class with Richie again, he noticed that some of the remarks and jokes Richie was saying during the class were actually funny; however, Eddie still refused to turn around to look at him because he didn't want Richie to know he thought that.</p><p>After the AP Psych class, Eddie and Richie had a free period together. Eddie knew that Richie and Bev would go out to smoke before they would go to lunch, so he got up and headed towards the cafeteria without looking at Richie.</p><p>When he was in the hallway, someone grabbed his hand. ''Hey, you won't even wait for me, that hurt Eds... we both have a free period, don't we?'' Richie asked as if he didn't know, and smirked at Eddie. Richie surprised him, so he just nodded instead of saying something. </p><p>''I thought you are going out... for a smoke.'' Eddie frowned while looking Richie straight in the eyes. Richie just smiled. ''Not today.'' Eddie didn't say anything; he just nodded again, and started walking towards the cafeteria without another word while Richie started following him.</p><p>They entered the cafeteria together, and Eddie went to pick up his meal. Richie, meanwhile, went to sit to the table where Bill and Stan were already sitting. Eddie just joined them a few minutes later, just like Bev.</p><p>They all were talking together, only Stan held himself back a little and avoided talking to Richie; he seemed to tolerate him at least. It seemed like they all knew each other for years, but Eddie knew that it wasn't the case. He knew Stan and Bill very well, of course. Beverly grew up in Derry just like him, so he knew about her a lot, he didn't know everything, but he knew enough about her, however, he knew almost nothing about Richie. He still did not feel comfortable enough in his presence to just ask him about his past, his hobbies or anything else. </p><p>When they were sitting at the table together, Richie was smirking at Eddie as before. Even though Eddie didn't feel that uncomfortable anymore, it still made him nervous. He was glad Bev and Richie weren't angry with him for what he had been thinking of them, but he still felt guilty, so he wasn't even correcting Richie when he was calling him 'Eds' and other weird nicknames.</p><p>Eddie then didn't see Richie for the rest of the week, but thoughts of him didn't leave Eddie's head.</p><p>On Friday, he also saw Henry who didn't even look at him, and Eddie was glad for that. He knew that whatever Richie had told him in that restroom, must have worked. Eddie was thankful to Richie for that as well. </p><p>After school, he went home with Stan like most days. They were talking, as always, when Stanley told him something that took him totally by surprise.</p><p>''Eddie, can I tell you something? I know you would know about it from Bill if I didn't tell you anyway, but it's important for me to say it because I want to explain it to you.'' Stanley was blushing and seemed to be really nervous when he said that to Eddie. </p><p>''Of course, whatever it is, I'm here for you,'' Eddie told Stan. It was true. Eddie would do anything for him.</p><p>After a while Stan continued: ''Bill and I made out,'' he said it quickly and quietly, so that no one could hear him. At first, Eddie didn't believe his ears, ''What? When?'' It was the last thing Eddie expected from Stan. It really surprised him.</p><p>''At Mike's, when you left the barn... we were both drunk, but it was genuine.'' Stan voice was trembling a little. Eddie really had no idea Stan and Bill had feelings for each other or were interested in boys in general.</p><p>''I just wanted to tell you because I wanted you to know that I like boys... but girls too, I honestly think I don't care about the gender of the person... I like the person... if that's possible, I don't know," Stanley said after a moment looking at Eddie with fear in his eyes. Eddie didn't know if it was fear of rejection or fear of not knowing, but he understood. Eddie smiled at him, ''It's okay, I'm proud of you for telling me, and I'm glad you told me.''</p><p>He was really proud of Stan. He was actually angry with himself for thinking that Stanley would judge him for liking boys, and he realized he judged someone before he knew for sure again. Eddie thought he really had to change his way of thinking.</p><p>''What now? Do you want to get together?” Eddie asked after a while. He didn't know if anything would change between them after that, but he wanted them to be happy, so it didn't matter to him.</p><p>Stanley smiled at him. ''I thought I was in love with Bill, but I think it was not a real love... I don't know… more like ‘best friend love’ and Bill is a little confused right now because he thought he was just into girls or I don't know… ask him, the point is that we decided we'll just stay friends.'' Eddie was even more surprised. He didn't expect it, but he understood. He was glad Stan didn't care how Bill reacted. The last thing he needed was for his best friends to argue or be sad.</p><p>''Oh okay, thank you again for telling me,'' Eddie said, and the two boys were already standing in front of Stanley's house. Stanley just smiled at him, and said goodbye.</p><p>Eddie knew that after Stan confessed to him that he liked boys, he should tell him that he is gay, but it was still scary for him. He didn't know when or how to tell him, but he knew he and Bill needed to know, especially after what Stan had told him. He wanted them to know. </p><p>Then Eddie continued walking home thinking about how terrible the weekend would be because he would have to either be in his room and study or with his mother in the living room. Neither was great, but it was inevitable.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. we are okay now</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Eddie was sitting in a classroom waiting for the teacher to give him the paper. He was about to take a SAT exam which he had taken many times before. It was very similar each year and he always got good results, but he was just as nervous as ever because he still didn’t want to get bad score.</p><p>The students had a lot of time to fill in the questions. There were four sections which were reading, writing, language and math, and students had over three hours to complete it.</p><p>After more than three hours, Eddie was done; however, he didn't feel good about it. After taking the SAT exam, students were supposed to proceed normally as scheduled, so Eddie was heading to classroom where a Chemistry class was supposed to take place.</p><p>When the teacher entered the classroom, he told the students that they would not be learning that day; he didn't want to be hard on them, given the fact that they had taken a three-hour long exam, so Eddie was glad. The teacher then told them to get in pairs because they would experiment that day instead. </p><p>Eddie was quickly looking for someone to pair up with because he didn't like the idea of being with Henry Bowers. Fortunately, he quickly found Dorsey; he was already looking at Eddie and letting Eddie know that he want to be in pairs with him. The teacher told them what to do, so after some time, Eddie and Dorsey started working on it. </p><p>The teacher didn't really care what the students were doing, so Eddie could talk to Dorsey more than ever before. They turned out to be very similar. Eddie felt like Dorsey was even more like him than Ben. It was weird, but he felt understood, so thanks to that, they got along pretty well.</p><p>Nothing special happened for the rest of the day and Eddie didn't even see his friends that day, not even Richie, and Stanley went to his 'bird club' meeting that day, so they didn’t go home together. </p><p>It wasn't really a bird club, but Eddie and Bill always called it that way because Stan mostly talked about how they were watching birds. In fact, Stanley enjoyed watching birds and their behavior the most, but they were doing a lot of other things there as well. </p><p>It was different on Tuesday. Ben confirmed to him on Tuesday when they were in a History class that he and Bev were a couple, and Ben never looked happier. Eddie was happy for them and was also glad that Bev hadn't told him about their conversation.</p><p>Later when he came to the cafeteria, the only one sitting there was Bill. Richie and Mike were supposed to come there that day as well, but they haven't been there yet, so Eddie decided to try to ask Bill about Stan. He didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable, so he decided to be smart about it.</p><p>''Bill, is there anything you want to tell me?'' Eddie asked. It didn't sound as smart as he thought it would. He didn't want to push him to tell him about what had happened on the Hanlon's farm, but at the same time, he wanted to let him know that he could tell him because he already knew. </p><p>''Stan has already t-told you, g-good,'' Bill paused, but after a while, he continued, ''I would have t-told you, but Stanley w-wanted to tell you himself b-because he wanted to explain it to you.'' Eddie was glad that he didn't make him uncomfortable by his question. </p><p>''I know, I’m proud of him.'' Eddie said genuinely, and smiled at Bill. ''Me too, I don't know... w-when I kissed him... I f-felt that it was r-right, but I also know I like g-girls, so I don't know where it p-puts me... anyway, we d-decided to be their friends, but he probably t-told you that? '' Bill asked. It was clear that he had trouble getting it out because he was stuttering more than usual.</p><p>Eddie smiled at him again. ''Yes, whatever you guys do, I will stand by you, and I'm glad you told me.'' Eddie was trying to let Bill know that it was okay to be confused, and it worked because Bill smiled back. Bill wanted to say something in response, but at that moment, they noticed Richie and Mike who were walking towards them. </p><p>Neither of them went to pick up a meal, so they were heading straight for the table where Eddie and Bill were sitting instead. They greeted them, and sat down. Richie smiled, especially at Eddie as he almost always did, and Eddie blushed.</p><p>After a while, Mike pulled out the food he had from home, and started eating. Richie didn't have anything again, as he almost never had, and just sat there with them. He just watched the others while he was joining the conversation. Eddie didn't know why he did not eat lunch, but he really didn't want to ask him that.</p><p>''Umm.. you know, my b-birthday is next week, so I've g-got an idea... I'd like to have a party,'' Bill was looking at the other boys, and he seemed to be very excited, ''we're no longer kid-ds, so… I guess… so I thought of having the p-party on Halloween... if you all want to, of course? That means you all are invited, in fact, only you three, Bev, Stan and Ben, but if you d-don't want to or can't make it...,'' Bill said and wanted to continue, but Richie interrupted him: ''Big Bill, of course we will come, I hope you have Halloween party in mind with costumes and everything though?''</p><p>''Of course, Beverly has already start-ted planning, and w-wants to help us with the costumes.'' Bill was clearly happy about Richie's reaction because his smile has grown bigger. ''Yes, it's your birthday party of course we will come Bill,'' Mike added, and Eddie nodded.</p><p>''But without alcohol this time,'' Eddie said, and everyone laughed. ''Come on, Eds, it won't be fun without it, you don't have to drink as much as last time, ya know,'' Richie smirked at him, ''but if you decide to drink, let me know in advance, so I can take the bed outside this time,'' Richie added. He was making fun of Eddie because of what happened last time when he almost fell asleep on the ground. It made Eddie angry, but after all he brought it upon on himself.</p><p>''Asshole.'' Eddie tried to punch Richie in the arm because of what he had said to him, but when Eddie moved his arm and intended to punch Richie, Richie avoided it, and grabbed Eddie's hand instead, so they were staring each other straight in the eyes. </p><p>After a few seconds, they quickly let go, and Eddie started eating his lunch again. He didn't want to look at Richie, but it was not because he bothered him, but because he was blushing from the sudden contact, and he knew that Richie was looking at him, so he didn't want him to see his pink cheeks again.</p><p>After that, they didn't talk about the party anymore, and neither Richie nor Eddie got involved in the conversation with Mike and Bill.</p><p>After Eddie's classes ended that day, he was supposed to meet Charlie again which he had almost completely forgotten about. In fact, he didn't even have time to think about what Charlie had told him last time because he had a lot of other stuff on his mind. Most of them involved Richie. He didn't know what Charlie would say to him, but he told himself that he would just think of something. He hoped she would let him be and he wouldn't have to go there again.</p><p>As before, Eddie was waiting in front of the office where he had last spoken to Charlie. After a while, Charlie came out, and called Eddie inside. Eddie sat down in the same seat as before, and Charlie was just smiling at him the whole time.</p><p>''Welcome back Eddie, how are you?'' Charlie asked friendly at first. Eddie immediately felt better when she didn't get to the point right away, so he smiled at her back. ''I'm fine, thank you for asking.''</p><p>''We haven't seen each other in a while...  so tell me Eddie, were you thinking about what have I told you last time?'' Charlie asked still smiling at him. Eddie started thinking; he didn't know what to say. </p><p>''Well… I don’t know… I guess... I still don’t want to leave?'' Eddie says genuinely, however, it sounded more like a question. He didn't know what else to say.</p><p>''You know... I help students with school and college applications, but it's not the only thing we talk about here, I also work as a school psychologist if you need advice on anything, you can ask me or confide to me, I can't tell anyone else about this anyway,'' Charlie told him in a serious tone and there was not a smile on her face anymore. ''I don’t need help with anything,'' Eddie replied simply.</p><p>''Okay... last time we were talking you mentioned your mother, is she the reason you don't want to go to college?'' Charlie asked him after they sat there in silence for a few seconds. </p><p>Eddie was very uncomfortable at that point and felt like it was way too personal, but he really didn't know what to tell her. He didn't want to talk to her about his mother. He didn't like talking about her with anyone. In spite of that, he decided to just tell her the truth, but he didn't want to go to details. </p><p>''Ummm... yeah, my mother wants me to stay here in town, she needs help.'' It wasn't quite true because Eddie knew she didn't really need help, but he couldn't tell Charlie that she was making him to stay, and he felt bad for leaving her. He felt like she wouldn't understand.</p><p>''What kind of help? Is she sick?’’ Charlie asked worriedly. ‘’Not really, just help... on the house and… stuff, she doesn’t want me to leave her,’’ Eddie answered truthfully after all without realizing. </p><p>''I see, does she often tell you what to do, Eddie?'' Charlie asked again. ''Yes, but every mother does it, it's nothing special,'' Eddie said simply. He was irritated with those questions.</p><p>''How does she react if you don't listen to her?'' Charlie was writing something down while she was asking him all those questions, and Eddie was even more irritated because he felt like he was being tested. </p><p>''I mostly listen to her, I don't want to hurt her, she would be sad and disappointed in me.'' Eddie didn't understand where Charlie was going with these questions, but he answered and hopped it would be over soon. </p><p>''I see... Eddie, remember when I told you last time to think about what you wanted to do in the future,'' Eddie nodded, ''can you do it for me again, but this time imagine that your mother wouldn't be here to tell you what to do and you could do whatever you wanted, anytime, anywhere, imagine yourself in a few years from now without your mother... '' Charlie didn't finish because Eddie interrupted her: ''It's hard, I can't just forget about her.'' He knew he shouldn't because it wasn't polite, but he was too irritated at that point. </p><p>''Just try it, simply things.'' Charlie said calmly, and smiled at Eddie again. ''Okay,'' Eddie answered still irritated after all, and started actually really thinking about it. Charlie was just looking at him and waiting for him to come up with something.</p><p>After a few minutes of sitting there in silence, Eddie has finally spoken up: ''Um... I'd probably live with someone I'd like, it doesn't have to be like... love of my love, but it could be a friend... I would study at University or work somewhere in city, not here in Derry, probably, I don't know, I'd get a dog, maybe... or… but I know it can't be that way, this is nonsense!'' Eddie was thinking about standing up, and leaving, but he didn't want to be impolite, so he just sat there with a frown on his face.</p><p>Charlie was doing the exact opposite, she was smiling at him. ''Good, that's nice... I would like you to visit me again in a month, but this time imagine this life you described to me here, but in more detail, okay?'' Charlie finished talking, and went to open the door for Eddie.</p><p>Eddie just nodded, and quickly left without another word. He wasn't very happy that he had to go there again in a month, but he expected it to be worse. He thought that Charlie might be as angry or disappointed in him because he didn't do what she wanted him to do last time, but she wasn't. </p><p>As soon as Eddie left Charlie's office, he headed out of the school. When he was walking home alone, he was thinking about what had happened and what they had been talking about in that office with Charlie. </p><p>Suddenly something pulled Eddie out of his thoughts. He could hear a loud noise coming from the street he lived in. The noise that sounded like loud music was coming from the place where Richie's house was, so Eddie decided to keep on walking because he wanted to know what was going on. </p><p>When Eddie arrived in front of the house where Richie lived, he could see two figures on the porch of the house. He immediately knew that one of them was Richie. </p><p>The other was an equally tall man who looked like he was in Eddie's mother's age. At first Eddie didn't recognized who it was, but after a while, he realized that it was the man whom Eddie had seen at the festival, who interrupted his conversation with Richie. Eddie realized it was probably Richie's father.</p><p>Eddie couldn't really see how Richie's father looked like because they were both standing too far from the place Eddie was standing at, and Eddie could only see their side profiles. It looked like they were arguing and shouting at each other, but Eddie couldn't hear anything because there was loud music coming from the radio that stood on the table next to them. Eddie also noticed that some neighbors came out of their houses to look at what was happening. They didn't look very happy.</p><p>Richie and the man turned to look at the street, so Richie noticed Eddie. He was staring Eddie straight in the eyes. Eddie noticed Richie had glasses on his nose again that he didn't normally wear. He smiled at him, but it wasn't his typical smile, rather forced. Then he turned on his heel, and went into the house. </p><p>Richie's father, meanwhile, turned off the radio, and started apologizing to all the neighbors. Then he quickly entered the house as well. The people then disappeared, and Eddie continued on his way home as well.</p><p>Eddie realized that Richie probably didn't have a very good relationship with his father. He didn't know why or what his father was like, but he understood that relationships with parents could be difficult. Eddie knew it very well from his own experience. He didn't argue with his mother a lot, but they also didn't have a healthy relationship. </p><p>Eddie didn't want to assume more things about Richie because he didn't want to make the same mistake like before, so he just diverted his thoughts to the conversation he had with Charlie again.</p><p>Eddie saw Richie for the next two days along with Bev, Greta and Sandy. Richie was behaving as usual, so Eddie thought that the argument with his father was nothing serious. Eddie didn't even ask him about it. It still seemed too personal for him to ask him about his family. </p><p>Eddie even exchanged a few words with Richie, Bev and Sandy in the classroom, but since Bev and Eddie didn't like Greta it was only a few minutes because Greta then approached Richie and Sandy, so they quickly went to their seats.</p><p>Friday was a little more interesting for Eddie. The classes he had and even lunch was not interesting at all, but something happened later. </p><p>When he was finished with school for that day, he went to put his textbooks in a locker in the main hall. Eddie unlocked the locker, and opened it. He was a little surprised because he didn't expect anything to fall out of the locker, but it did. He usually had everything perfectly organized.</p><p>There was almost nobody in the hallway, so they paid no attention to Eddie when he bent down to pick up the paper that had fallen out of his locker. At first he thought it was a paper from his notebook, but when he picked it up, and turned it over, he noticed that it wasn't. The paper was slightly folded and there was something written inside. Eddie opened it, and read what was written there:</p><p>You stole my heart the moment you came to town<br/>
I said hello, but you were gone the moment you turned around<br/>
You can’t get away, can’t get away, even if you try now<br/>
I wanna tell you but the words just can’t be found</p><p>I like the way you move and just the way you are<br/>
I can’t take anymore, ‘cos your pushing too hard<br/>
You can’t get away, can’t let you go, what’s a boy to do now<br/>
You got me askin’ myself how I survived so far</p><p>I gotta get away from you,<br/>
‘Cos I’ve never been afraid of love ‘til I met you<br/>
Never thought a boy could make me feel the way you do</p><p>Eddie read what was written there, and started blushing. The text sounded familiar to him, but he didn't know why. He started thinking. Why would anyone give it to him? </p><p>Eddie thought that someone must have had a crush on him which meant it was probably some girl because he didn't think any guy in Derry was interested in boys, except for Stan and Bill who liked other boys, but the three of them were basically considered losers at school. Other people at their school had many friends and dated girls, the three of them didn't.</p><p>After a few minutes, Eddie realized that it might have been one of the poems that Ben wrote, and it happened to be among his things. It often happened to him with the things of his friends. </p><p>Eventually Eddie took the paper home, and wanted to keep it. He wanted to ask Ben later if it was his poems or not, but there was also possibility that it wasn't, and he didn't want to tell about it to anyone. He hoped someone had put the paper in his locker for him, but he doubted it. Eventually, he didn't think much of it. He decided that it probably didn't mean anything.</p><p>Instead of thinking about the letter, he started thinking about his costume for Halloween. He still hasn't figured out which costume he wanted, and it was already Friday. He had agreed with Bev that they would meet up on Saturday, and he would help her with the costumes for each of their friends.</p><p>Eddie was thinking about it for hours, and then he finally knew. It wasn't such a complicated costume, so he was glad that Bev and he wouldn't have to do much work.</p><p>In the afternoon, Eddie called the number Bev had given him, hoping her father wouldn't answer. Fortunately, Beverly picked up the phone. They agreed to meet up the next day at Bev's house early in the morning.</p><p>On Saturday morning, Eddie was walking to Beverly's house. They had decided to meet up that soon because her father wouldn't like it if Bev had a boy in their apartment. That was why Bev had told Eddie to come in early in the morning when Beverly's father was at work, and he was supposed to be there until the late afternoon that day, even though it was the weekend. </p><p>Eddie had told his mother that he was going to Bill's house, and she didn't mind. Eddie had a similar problem like Bev, her mother wouldn't let Eddie bring a girl to their house, even though he was gay, but his mother didn't know that.</p><p>When Eddie arrived to the place where Bev lived, he started searching for the door of her apartment. According to what Bev had told him on the phone, she didn't live in a house, but she lived in a small block of flats which was located near the city center. </p><p>Eddie entered the building a started looking for 'Marsch' surname which should have been written on the door. When he found the door with Bev's surname written on it, he rang the bell, and after a moment, Bev opened door, and greeted him enthusiastically.</p><p>Then she started leading him to her room, and they immediately started talking about the costumes. Beverly told him what other's wanted and what their expectations were.</p><p>After a while, they started working on Stan’s and Mike’s costumes first because they were the most complicated ones to make. They've managed to pick out the fabrics, some old clothes and other things they needed. They've also written down what they needed to buy, but Beverly had a lot stuff she had used to adjust her own clothes, so they didn't have to buy a lot of stuff.</p><p>They haven't started sewing anything yet because they haven't known their friends' sizes yet. Bev only measured Eddie because she wanted to start working on his costume later, even without him. </p><p>Eddie could tell Beverly really loved fashion and she looked like she was glowing with enthusiasm. Eddie was also very interested in what she was doing and had so much fun working on costumes with Bev, even though they haven't properly even started. He also didn't have as much experience as Beverly, so he was mostly looking at what she was doing.</p><p>''What do you think of Richie?'' Beverly asked him suddenly when they were in the middle of planning. Eddie stopped everything he was doing not knowing how to answer because he didn't know. He didn't even understand why she was asking him that.</p><p>''I don’t know... why are you asking me this?'' Eddie finally replied with a question. ''Oh... just... nothing,'' Beverly shook her head, and continued to work. </p><p>Eddie couldn't just stop thinking about what she had asked him, so he decided to answer after a few minutes because he wanted to know what she meant by that. ''He can be an asshole sometimes, but he's also nice sometimes... I mean I don't know... we don't talk much, I don't know why... I didn't like him at first, but we are okay now, I guess.'' It was such a confused answer, but that's exactly how Eddie felt: confused.</p><p>''Yeah... you right he can be an asshole sometimes, but he is also kind and funny, don't you think?'' Bev asked with smile on her face. It seemed strange to Eddie, he didn't understand why she was telling him that or why was she even talking about him, so he shrugged. ''I guess, yeah.''</p><p>They didn't talk about Richie after that; instead they kept planning and figuring out how to make the costumes for others, but Eddie was still thinking about her questions.</p><p>When everything was planned, it was afternoon, and Eddie had to leave before Bev's father came home. Before he left, Bev and he had made plans that they would meet up with others the following weekend to measure their bodies for clothing sizes, and Beverly would sew it up and prepare it for them after. </p><p>On the way home, he was thinking about what Bev was asking him again. Eddie thought it was weird. He didn't understand why she just mentioned Richie out of blue, and asked him what he thought of him. He thought it was clear to her. She knew he had been avoiding him before. He didn't think about him the same as before, but he didn't really know what he thought of him at that moment. </p><p>Richie treated him nicely sometimes, he teased him and sometimes he acted like a total asshole. He considered Richie as one member of their group at that point, but he didn't know if he considered him his friend.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>LYRICS CREDIT:<br/>Afraid of Love by TOTO - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WXlJNzS0Kx4</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. the losers club</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Eddie was thinking about what Charlie had told him when he visited her the whole weekend, and as she had told him he was trying to imagine what his life would be like if his mother couldn't control it. He still didn't know what he would enjoy doing or studying at the university if he had the opportunity to go, but it hit him on Monday. Eddie was surprised that he hadn't thought about it before.</p><p>When Eddie was in an AP Psych class, Mr. Carson was telling them about people who had been affected by trauma and how to deal with it. That was when Eddie realized that psychology was one of the subjects he wanted to know more about. Moreover, he liked the idea of becoming a psychiatrist and helping people who had unpleasant experiences and problems in their lives. </p><p>Unfortunately, Eddie knew it wouldn't be possible. Not only he and his mother did not have money to pay for the college, but she also would never let him go, and as far as he knew, she would never forgive him if he moved away from her.</p><p>Later Eddie quickly forgot about university and Charlie because Bill's birthday was on Wednesday, so he focused on his best friend and his birthday party instead. </p><p>When Eddie had a free period with Bill, Bev, Stan, and Richie that day, they all wished him happy birthday. Richie was so excited about his birthday that all the students sitting with them in the cafeteria knew about Bill's birthday as well because he couldn't keep quiet about it.</p><p>Eddie partly thought Richie had done it on purpose so everyone would know that about Bill's birthday, but he knew that Richie was sometimes wild and started talking before he was thinking about the consequences, so Eddie wasn't sure. </p><p>It was embarrassing for Eddie at first because he hated any attention he or their group was given, but he oddly started enjoying it after a while because Richie was really hilarious about it. In fact, Richie was one of the funniest people Eddie knew.</p><p>When Eddie started getting to know him better, he realized that he was actually having a lot of fun with him. Sometimes he was joking around about Eddie which was the only thing that was pissing him off, but Eddie soon learned how to shut him up.</p><p>As they were sitting together in the cafeteria, Bill was telling them about the details of his birthday/Halloween party which was supposed to take place the following weekend. He told them that Georgie was going to stay with Eddie Corconan all weekend and his parents would be in the house with them only for a few hours, and then they were going to town for the evening, so they would not return until early in the Sunday morning.</p><p>Bill didn’t want them to bring alcohol, mainly because he didn't want them to be wasted right away, but also because he was supposed to be in charge of the house, so he didn't want anyone to catch them drinking because most of them were still minors, however, he reassured them he would have beers which were not so strong. </p><p>Richie seemed like he was going to protest at first, but then he agreed. Eddie was happy, because he didn't plan to drink alcohol this time, preferably none at all, anyway. </p><p>When Eddie was done with all the classes that day, he went back to his locker to put a few textbooks he didn’t need inside, just like in the previous days, and the same thing that had happened the previous week happened again.</p><p>When Eddie opened his locker, the paper did not fall to the floor, but he noticed that it was inside the locker. Eddie wanted to make sure it was another letter someone had left for him, so he opened it, and read what was written there:</p><p>Sometimes I wonder<br/>
How I’d ever make it through,<br/>
Through this world without having you<br/>
I just wouldn’t have a clue</p><p>‘Cause sometimes it seems<br/>
Like this world’s closing in on me,<br/>
And there’s no way of breaking free<br/>
And then I see you reach for me</p><p>It was shorter than the last one, but as much meaningful as before. Eddie blushed, and was confused again. He hadn’t really paid mind to it before, but at that moment he understood that it was definitely for him and not one of Ben's poems because it would be weird if he found another one in his stuff. </p><p>He hid the paper in his backpack as before, and headed to the main entrance of school.</p><p>Later when Eddie was walking home with Stan, he wasn't really paying attention to what Stanley was telling him; instead he was wondering who have been leaving the letters for him in his locker. It was very romantic and nice, the only thing that bothered Eddie was that he had no idea who it was from, but he was determined to find it out.</p><p>When Eddie got home, he put the letter in the drawer as the previous one, and stated thinking about people who might have liked him. </p><p>Eddie thought that the worst thing about it was that it was probably from a girl. Eddie would feel bad when he would have to tell her he wasn't interested, but there was nothing he could do about it. He dreamed about a boy giving them to him, but he knew it was unlikely because he didn't believe there was another boy in Derry who liked boys.</p><p>When his mother came home later in the evening, it was the first time she had mentioned the new neighbors who lived in the street with them. Eddie knew she would say something bad about them even before she started talking because she wouldn't be telling him about them if it was flattering. Every time his mother decided to talk to him, it was because she wanted to complain or tell him what to do.</p><p>''Eddie-bear, did you notice that new people moved into the street?... into that big house almost at the end of the street?'' Eddie's mother said with disgust in her voice, ''Mary told me that those people had a party last week, and they even made a scene in front of everyone,'' Eddie's mother added. It was typical for her to talk to their neighbors, and gossip about other people who lived in town, so Eddie wasn't surprised.</p><p>Eddie knew he couldn't tell her about Richie and his parents. He knew she would exaggerate again, as always, so he just shook his head, and acted like he didn't know about it because he didn't want to explain her why he had been present there and he didn't want her to know he knew Richie.</p><p>After that she started talking about Richie's parents, whom she had never seen in her life, but Eddie didn’t really listen and tried to excuse himself. He eventually went to his room, and started doing his homework for school. By evening, he was done and was thinking about who his secret admirer was again. </p><p>Eddie was imagining all sorts of scenarios about who has given the letters to him. He was also looking forward to finding another letter in his locker because he liked them, and he wanted to find out who was giving them to him, so he hoped he would.</p><p>The next day, Eddie made plans with Stan to go shopping at the Derry Mall on Friday afternoon after school. They both still needed to buy a present for Bill.</p><p>Eddie was waiting for someone to leave another letter in his locker for him, but when Friday came, he hadn't found anything, but he wasn't disappointed, he was convinced he would get one on Monday, at least he hoped.</p><p>When Eddie was walking towards the exit of the school building on Friday, he met Dorsey with whom he had had a class that day. They didn't talk because both of them were walking in an opposite direction; they just smiled at each other. In the distance, Eddie could see Stan waiting for him and watching him, so Eddie looked away, and continued walking towards him.</p><p>When he approached Stan, the two greeted each other, and started walking to the Derry Mall, which was not far away.</p><p>''Do you know Dorsey is gay?'' Stanley asked with a smile on his face. Eddie was surprised. Not only he didn't know about it, but also he didn't understand why Stan was asking him that. </p><p>For a second, Eddie thought that Stanley knew about him being gay, and almost started panicking, but before Eddie could say anything Stan continued. ''Georgie mentioned it to Bill... I had no idea there were more people at our school who like guys... I feel better now because I know that I'm not alone, you know,'' Stan added.</p><p>Eddie still didn't know how to answer. ''Really? I didn't know that,'' he said at last, and started thinking about the letters and the possibility that they might have been from Dorsey after all, but he soon realized it was stupid thought. He didn't even know if he wanted them to be from him. He didn't know Dorsey well, he seemed to be a good guy, but Eddie had never thought about him in that way.</p><p>At the Derry Mall, Eddie and Stan were shopping together for a while, and then they decided to split up. After two hours, they were both happy with what they had for Bill, and started walking home.</p><p>When Eddie came home, his mother was still at work, so he went to put his backpack in his room, and changed his clothes.</p><p>Later, Eddie decided to make dinner. He cooked for himself and his mother sometimes, but not very often. His mother didn't mind when she was cooking for both of them all the time, but Eddie wanted to impress her and wanted her to be proud that he could take care of himself, so he started cooking.</p><p>After about an hour he was done, he ate his portion, and left the bigger one for his mother in the kitchen. Then he decided to do some assignments for school, even though, it was Friday and he didn't want to, but he knew he wouldn't have time the following day because he was going to meet Beverly and the others to help them with the costumes for Halloween and Bill's party.</p><p>Eddie went to his room, sat down in front of his desk, and took his things out of his backpack. He knew he had several assignments and homework to write, so he decided to do the thing he least enjoyed first. He decided to start with math homework, it was the hardest for him, given the fact, he hated math.</p><p>When he opened the notebook, he wanted to start working, but he noticed that there was something in it. It was another piece of paper, the same as the two he had found in his locker. Eddie was confused about how someone had managed to put it in his notebook, but he was also excited because he didn't expect to find it there.</p><p>Eddie realized he had a Chemistry class with Dorsey that day, so he started wondering if it wasn't him who had put it there when he hadn't been looking again. He didn't want to think about it; instead he opened the folded paper, and started reading:</p><p>You’re just too good to be true<br/>
Can’t take my eyes off of you<br/>
You’d be like heaven to touch<br/>
I wanna hold you so much</p><p>At long last, love has arrived<br/>
And I thank God I’m alive<br/>
You’re just too good to be true<br/>
Can’t take my eyes off of you</p><p>Pardon the way that I stare<br/>
There’s nothin’ else to compare<br/>
The sight of you leaves me weak<br/>
There are no words left to speak</p><p>After reading the letter, Eddie immediately realized why the first letter sounded so familiar to him, so he opened the drawer in which he hid the two previous letters, and read the first one again.</p><p>Eddie realized that on all of the three letters were written lyrics from songs. He recognized the lyrics written on the letter he had found last immediately. He had heard that song quite often on the radio which his mother was listening to. He had heard the first one a few times too, but he didn't know all the words, so he didn't realize at first.</p><p>Eddie was amazed; he didn't mind that the person didn't come up with it themselves. He liked that they had taken time to find songs with lyrics that would express how they felt, or at least Eddie thought it was what the person was trying to do.</p><p>At that moment, he also realized something else. A memory flashed through his head, and he remembered the day after the weekend he had gone to Aladdin with Bev, Ben and Richie. He didn't know why he thought of that, but it made him realized something. At least he hoped it was what he thought, he still wasn't sure.</p><p>Eddie remembered seeing Richie in the main hall of the school wearing headphones. The music he had been listening had been playing loudly, just like a few days ago when Richie and his father had been arguing in front of their house. In both cases, Richie had looked upset, so it made sense. </p><p>Was it possible that it was Richie? Was it possible that he was expressing his emotions in that way? Eddie remembered he had seen Richie in the morning; they had been in the cafeteria together, so he could have easily put it in his backpack when he hadn’t been looking.</p><p>Shortly after, Eddie told himself that he was dreaming too much and that it was not possible, Richie could never be interested in him. Eddie didn't even understand how he came up with that and didn't know what he would do if it was from Richie by any chance. He was also still thinking about the possibility that it was from Dorsey or someone completely different.</p><p>Then Eddie realized that he would see him the following day, so he told himself that he would try to find out if it was really Richie depending on how he would treat him. If necessary, he would just wait for another letter.</p><p>Eddie thought that even the lyrics written on the last letter he got indicated that it was from Richie. He was staring at him all the time, but if the reason why he was doing that was because he liked him, it would change everything. Eddie blushed after that thought ran through his head. He was reading the last letter over and over again, and was thinking about it until the evening. </p><p>In the end, he didn't do any homework, so wanted to do something in the morning at least. He couldn't stop thinking about the letters. Eddie felt like he was going crazy.</p><p>The next morning Eddie woke up early in the morning how he had planned, and started working on the tasks he had originally planned to do the day before. When he was done, it was almost time for him to get going. He had made plans with Bev to arrive a little earlier than everyone else to help her prepare it all in advance. It was still quite early, given the fact; they had to meet up before Bev’s father came home from work again.</p><p>Eddie got dressed, and prepared everything they had agreed on that he would bring. It was just few things Eddie had offered to bring because he had them at home and Beverly didn't want to buy them at the store. It was just more fabric, glitter and he also took a few things from his mother. A few lipsticks and eye shadow that only Richie, Stanley and Mike needed. They didn't need it that day because it was useless to finish the whole costume when it wasn't Halloween, but he wanted to give it to them that day already.</p><p>Later when Eddie arrived at Marsh's apartment, she greeted him warmly, and hugged him as she always did. Eddie gave her all the things he had brought, and Bev was thrilled, so they started working almost immediately. </p><p>It was an hour before the others were about to arrive, so they decided that Eddie would try on some of the parts of his costume before that. Fortunately for Eddie, his costume was not very complicated, in fact, the character he had chosen was very similar to him in appearance, so it wasn't hard to make the costume and adjust it.</p><p>After a while, they were done and at the same moment, someone rang the bell. Beverly immediately enthusiastically got up, and went to open the door. It was Bill and Mike. They arrived a little earlier, but it didn't matter.</p><p>The two came in, and greeted Bev and Eddie. Bev offered them and Eddie a drink and something to eat. After a while, she poured everyone juice she had in the fridge, and made a small snack.</p><p>A few minutes later, Ben and Stanley arrived together as well. When Ben and Stan entered the living room, they greeted them, and Bev offered them a drink and food as well. They happily accepted, and sat down with the others in the living room on the couch. </p><p>Bev was telling them about her family, or rather that she only lived with her father. She didn't tell them everything, only Eddie and Richie who hasn't been there yet, knew about what her father was like.</p><p>Eddie was a little nervous about seeing Richie because he still wasn't sure if it was Richie who had given him the letters, he didn't know how he would treat him if it was him. He planned to find it out though. He didn't want to ask him, but he wanted to observe him. </p><p>Eddie had noticed that Richie was treating him differently than others, but he had never thought of it that way. Eddie thought he was just an easy target for Richie to make fun of or tease him for fun.</p><p>It was almost an hour later, and they no longer wanted to wait for Richie, so they decided to start working. They got up, and Bev started leading them to her room where she started showing and explaining them everything. </p><p>After a while, the bell rang again, it was clear that it was Richie. Eddie could tell Bev was mad at him because he was late. She had her hands full when the bell rang because she was trying to help Mike to put a skirt on, which was part of his costume, so she told Eddie to go open the door.</p><p>That was the last thing Eddie wanted to do at that moment, but he didn't want others to think anything was going on between them by a chance, so he went to open the door for him after all.</p><p>Eddie opened the door, and Richie was standing there with an absent expression on his face at first, but after a moment, his expression changed, and he smirked at Eddie. Eddie couldn't help, but froze and started blushing.</p><p>''Oh sorry Eds, I was expecting your mother to open, can you call her for me, we have..,'' Richie started talking, but couldn't finish his sentence because Eddie interrupted him. ''Shut up,'' Eddie motioned for Richie to go inside without another word. Then he closed the door behind him.</p><p>When they reached Bev's room, Bev was still mad at Richie. Richie greeted everyone, and went to whisper something to her. Eddie had no idea what he was telling her, but it was probably why he was late. ''Eddie, will you help Richie with that shirt and velvet jacket so I know if he needs to adjust it?'' Bev asked, and smiled at Eddie. Eddie nodded, and Richie approached him with a smile.</p><p>The others were trying on their own costumes. They didn't pay any mind to Eddie and Richie. </p><p>After a while, Richie started taking off his Hawaiian shirt and a T-shirt, which he was wearing. Eddie immediately turned away from him, and started looking in a different direction. When everyone else was changing, Eddie didn't mind, but watching Richie taking off his T-shirt was different. Eddie didn't know why he was totally panicking, but he couldn’t help himself. </p><p>''You have to show me what... which one? I don't know what you were working on here, Eds,'' Richie said amused, and Eddie finally turned around, and looked at him. Eddie was sure his face was red like a tomato. It looked like Richie was enjoying when he could bring Eddie into such a state, and he knew very well what he was doing. Eddie knew he had to keep it together.</p><p>After a moment, he picked up the shirt and jacket which was lying on the bed in a pile of cloth and clothing, and handed it to Richie. Richie started putting on the shirt, it wasn't fully sewn yet because Bev didn't know the right size, so Eddie had to put pins on it and mark it where it was supposed to be sewn.</p><p>Eddie felt pretty uncomfortable in that situation, but he didn't want to show it. He took the pins, approached Richie, started measuring the shirt, and putting the pins on it. Richie was smiling at him while he was doing it, and every time Eddie touched his skin, he felt like he was on fire. At one point, he was even thinking about running his hands all over his chest, but he knew it wasn't appropriate.</p><p>His hands were shaking a little, and Eddie knew Richie must have noticed it. ''Do ya think I'm going to look good as Robert Smith?'' Eddie thought Richie was probably trying to get the conversation going to make it less awkward for them. ''Umm... I don't know who it is... so I don't know.''</p><p>''Gee, Eds, are you living under a rock? He is the singer of the coolest band ever, The Cure? Do not tell me ya haven’t heard about them,'' Richie sounded and looked really surprised, so Eddie felt ashamed because he really didn't know them, but he didn't want to lie.</p><p>''Umm... I don't know, I don't listen to music much, so I can't say.'' It was true, he wanted to listen to music, but he didn't have many opportunities to do so because he didn't have his own music player. ''Oh my God, how can you not listen to music... that's almost the only thing I do.'' </p><p>''I can't, I don’t have a Walkman, and my mom always listens to the radio,'' Eddie admitted truthfully. He wasn't looking at him while he was putting the pins around his arms and waist, so he didn't know what Richie was thinking, but Eddie refused to look up because he was still blushing.</p><p>''Oh.'' That was the only thing Richie said. If Eddie was being honest, it made him feel a little better when Richie was talking at him because he wasn’t thinking about his exposed chest anymore, however, he started thinking about the lyrics on the letters again and was wondering if that was the reason why Richie started talking about music with him. </p><p>A few seconds later when Richie distracted Eddie to the point that he couldn't really think straight, Eddie stabbed Richie in the wrist where the buttons were supposed to be. Richie just hissed, but said nothing. </p><p>"Oh my god, I'm sorry," Eddie said with panic in his voice. He went for a clean cloth to stop the small bleeding because he didn't want it to end up on that shirt. It was nothing, so it didn't need any treatment, but he was still panicking about it for some reason. Not only he hated blood, but he also didn’t mean to hurt Richie.</p><p>He held the cloth on his wound a few seconds while they were looking into each other's eyes. It wasn't awkward, but it was definitely strange to Eddie. He was almost certain that it was Richie, who was sending him the letters, he didn't know why, but he just knew it, however, he still wanted to wait until he would receive another one or told him something about it before confronting him in case they weren’t from him. </p><p>After a while, Richie took Eddie's hand, and put the bloodied cloth away. ''It’s okay,'' Richie said simply, and smiled at him sweetly. Eddie nodded. He threw it to the garbage, and continued to work.</p><p>Later when Eddie was done, Richie took off the shirt with the marked parts, and put on the black velvet jacket that Bev had found in his father's drawer. Apparently, he had never worn it, so it was okay for them to use it because he wouldn't even notice.</p><p>Eddie watched as Richie put on the jacket. His entire chest was exposed again, and Eddie couldn’t help himself, but he blushed again. </p><p>The jacket was the exact Richie's size, so Eddie didn't make any adjustments to it, and told Richie to put his own clothes back on. Then he quickly went to Bev with the shirt without another glance at Richie.</p><p>Everyone was already done with theirs, so they were all getting dressed. Eddie gave Bev Richie's shirt, and Bev smiled and thanked him.</p><p>When they were done, Bill asked them if they want to go to the Barrens because they still had some time left before going home. Ben told Eddie, Stan, and Bill the previous week that he figured out how to build the club house there, and he wanted to show them.</p><p>Everyone said they had no problem with that, so they all got up, and left the apartment. It was the first time Bev, Richie and Mike would go there with them so it was really excited for them, even though Eddie and Stan didn’t see anything interesting about that place.</p><p>Eddie didn't have a bike with him that time; however, Bill, Stan and Mike did, so they had to ride slowly while the others were walking. As soon as they left Bev's apartment, Richie and Bev lit a cigarette, so Eddie walked away from them, and started talking to Ben instead.</p><p>When they threw the cigarettes away, Bev grabbed Ben's hand, so Richie walked beside Eddie. They didn't say a word to each other; they were just listening to what others were talking about. </p><p>After a few minutes, they reached the Barrens. Eddie expected Richie to find it disgusting or strange to go there considering he had been living in the city, but on the contrary, Richie looked surprised and amazed. Mike had a similar reaction to Richie, but he wasn't as surprised. After all, he lived not far from there, and Bev was just smiling happily.</p><p>''There is no place or tree where the club house could be built, so I've got an idea... what if dug a hole in the ground, and do it there?'' Ben asked. ''We can put wood and leaves over it, and no one would even know there is such a place here, what do you say?'' Ben asked again.</p><p>''Club house?'' Richie laughed. ''We really are the Losers Club, aren't we?'' Richie said with a smirk on his face. Everyone laughed at Richie’s remark, except Stan. Eddie knew that Stan still didn't like him because he often avoided any conversation he was supposed to have with him. Stan was only tolerating him in their group, but he wasn't thrilled with him being there.</p><p>''Losers club, t-that has a nice r-ring to it,'' Bill said, and laughed again. Then he turned to Ben, ''That's a gr-reat idea, when should we g-get to work?''</p><p>''In two weeks? Next weekend is Halloween, and we should start with it before it is too cold to be outside,'' Ben announced with a smile on his face. ''Works for m-me, what do you think, losers?'' Bill took a look at the rest of them, they all nodded, and Stan rolled his eyes. Eddie felt good about it. It was a bit childish, but it was a great idea.</p><p>They were talking about everything they came up with for the rest of the day, mostly about how to build the club house and about their costumes. Eddie avoided talking to Richie for the rest of the time, just like Stan. </p><p>It wasn't because Eddie didn't want to talk to him, but he was nervous, and he started blushing every time Richie even looked at him. He still didn't know if the letters were from him, but he believed they were. He was just wondering what would happen the following week at Bill's Halloween/birthday party.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>LYRICS CREDIT:<br/>When I See You Smile by Bad English - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cu6pclWsxzs  <br/>Can't Take My Eyes Off You by Frankie Valli - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NGFToiLtXro&amp;t=34s</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. tongue is the strongest muscle</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The whole week at school before Bill’s party was not really special. Eddie and his friends finally received their results from SAT exam they had taken one month ago, so when Eddie was having lunch with Bev and Ben on Monday, they were spending the whole time talking to Eddie about their results. </p><p>The two wanted to go to college. Ben was very smart, he had gotten almost as many points as Eddie, and Beverly was very determined, so when they were telling him about their results, he was not surprised that they were good.</p><p>After the free period, Eddie was supposed to have a Chemistry class with Dorsey and Henry. He was still wondering if it was Dorsey who had sent him the letters, but he subconsciously wanted it to be Richie, however, he would have never admitted it to himself. </p><p>Eddie hadn't received another letter until Thursday. He had expected to find something in either the locker or the notebook again at the start of the week, but he hadn’t found anything, so he was starting to think that the person who had left the letters for him would not send him another one, but just when he opened the locker on Thursday after he was done with the classes, he finally found another one. He opened it as soon as he saw it, and started reading:</p><p>Here I am, I’m looking out my window<br/>
I’m dreaming about you<br/>
Can’t let go, at six o’clock in the morning<br/>
I feel you beside me</p><p>I need you now<br/>
More than the words can say<br/>
I need you now<br/>
I’ve got to find a way<br/>
I need you now<br/>
Before I lose my mind<br/>
I need you now</p><p>Eddie couldn't tell if it was from Richie, Dorsey or someone else, but he was touched by the lyrics once again, however, he was nervous about it as well; he felt butterflies in his stomach, so he put the letter in his backpack without hesitation, and headed out from school.</p><p>Stan went to a meeting with his club that day, so Eddie had time to think while he was walking home. He didn't know what to do. He was wondering if he should ask Richie about it, but he wasn't brave enough to do it, and even though he tried to figure out from whom the letters were, he still wasn't sure. </p><p>In the end, Eddie decided to wait for his secret admirer’s next move. After all, Richie and Eddie were supposed to spend the weekend at Bill's house, so he hoped that if it was Richie, he would do something about it. In case Richie would not do anything, then Eddie would have to assume that someone else has been giving them to him.</p><p>On Friday, Bill told everyone when should they come and what to bring to his house for the weekend. Beverly also handed everyone their finished costumes that day, and Eddie could tell she was very excited about the whole thing. He was more nervous than anything. </p><p>Later when Eddie was at home with his mother, he told her that he would not be home for Halloween, but she didn't like that. She didn't mind when Eddie was spending time with Bill, but she wanted to spend Halloween with his son. </p><p>Eddie later managed to talk her out of it because he wanted to enjoy the last year he had with his friends which was true. </p><p>After that, Eddie went to wrap a present he had for Bill, and then he went to complete his homework for school while he was thinking about what would happen on the weekend. He even tried to put on his costume to see what it looked like, and he loved the costume.</p><p>Beverly was really good at what she was doing with clothes. Eddie thought she should work as a fashion designer in the future, but he had no idea what she wanted to do. All he knew was that she and Ben wanted, just like Bill and Stan, go to college; however, he wasn't so sure about Richie and Mike because they have never talked to him about it.</p><p>Bill told everyone that his parents would be gone by six in the evening, so he wanted them to come before that because his parents wanted to see them all before they would leave. Eddie was really surprised that they had allowed Bill to invite so many people over, and left the house to him without any supervision, but on the other hand, Bill was very responsible and wouldn't let anything bad happen, so it was understandable that they trusted him. </p><p>Eddie was sure nothing would happen. He knew that the only one who would be able to do or break something was Richie because he always had weird and crazy ideas.</p><p>When Eddie woke up on Saturday, it was relatively late and he didn't want to get up. When he realized what time it was, he got up anyway, and headed for the kitchen in his pajamas. Since it was almost afternoon, he missed breakfast. </p><p>His mother asked him if he was sick because he had been sleeping for so long, but Eddie managed to convince her otherwise and after a while, she forgot about it. The last thing he needed was for his mother to think he was sick and wanted him to stay at home.</p><p>His mother was in the middle of carving pumpkins because she hadn’t had time until that morning when Eddie came to the kitchen. Eddie noticed that their house was already decorated with Halloween ornaments and candles. It looked the same every year, so he wasn't particularly amazed by it, but he really liked it anyway. He really liked Halloween in general. </p><p>The only thing Eddie didn't like about Halloween was that Bill always made him watch horror movies on the television at his house. Eddie usually didn't find them scary, but there were useless jump scares that he hated. He couldn't concentrate properly on the plot and he found every horror movie very similar, so he really did not enjoyed them that much. </p><p>Stan usually wasn’t present during watching scary movies with the two boys, mainly because Stan’s family didn’t celebrate Halloween at home because they were Jewish, but Stanley’s mom usually let him go trick-or-treating with the boys when they were younger because it was more like a neighborhood’s tradition and it had nothing to do with their religion according to Stan’s words, but his father could never know about it because he hated that time of the year, so Eddie had been spending most of the time just with Bill on that day who loved watching horror movies. </p><p>After Eddie finished talking with his mother, he went to get ready. He had to take extra clothes with him because he wouldn't want to go home in a costume the following day, hygiene items, his pajamas, the present for Bill and everything else he needed. He then didn't even bother to put on casual clothes, and went to put on his costume. </p><p>After a while, he was looking at himself in a mirror. He was wearing gray trousers, a white T-shirt, a yellow-and-black sweater  with only two buttons buttoned up from below, and a yellow-black jacket. </p><p>Eddie also had to adjust his hair a bit because the character he had chosen had straighter hair then him. He went for the hair gel his mother had in the bathroom, and put it slightly in his hair. He finished the look with black sunglasses, and was ready to go. He looked great, and exactly like Ferris Bueller.</p><p>Eddie had chosen Ferris Bueller because he admired him. Eddie honestly thought that his friend Cameron, who was always worried about everything, was more similar to him because Ferris was the exact opposite, but that was why he admired him. </p><p>In fact, Ferris reminded him of Richie. They both seemed like they were very smug, but they were also very charismatic and charming. He admired Ferris because he wasn't afraid to break the rules, and he was never caught breaking them.</p><p>Later, his mother called him to lunch which was later than usual that day that meant he had about one hour before he was supposed to leave. He spent the rest of the time at home thinking about what he was going to do about the letters and hoped Richie would tell him something about it that day and more immortally, he hoped it was him who was leaving them for him. </p><p>When it was time for Eddie to go, he left the house, and started walking towards the street where Bill's house was standing. He was wearing the costume and had a few bags and a backpack with him, so he couldn't ride a bike that time.</p><p>When he was almost halfway there, someone tapped him on the shoulder, so Eddie turned around. At first, he hardly recognized who it was, but then he realized. </p><p>''Do you need a hand?'' Richie asked with a smile on his face, and instead of waiting for an answer, he took the bag from Eddie, and put it over his shoulder.</p><p>Eddie was really surprised at what Richie looked like, he didn't know what Robert Smith looked like, but he didn't expect this look. He only knew he would be wearing the shirt, the black pants and the black velvet jacket he had seen before which he was wearing, but he also had a necklace around his neck. However, what surprised Eddie weren’t his clothes or a necklace, but Richie's hair and makeup. </p><p>The hair which was normally sticking out in all directions was sticking out even more than usual, and it seemed like he had straightened it. He was also wearing a black eyeliner and red lipstick. </p><p>Eddie knew he would need those things because Bev had told him, but he didn't know how much or how it would look like on him. Eddie thought that Richie looked absolutely fantastic. He looked even more handsome.</p><p>Eddie has been staring at him for several seconds without a word. ''You should wear that eyeliner more often.'' Eddie said without thinking, but he didn't look at him. He was afraid he would start blushing again if he did. </p><p>''How come you don't drive today?'' Eddie asked so he would change the subject because he regretted saying that, and started walking towards Bill's house again while Richie started following him. </p><p>''You like it?... I am trying to be a responsible driver, ya know, in case I would drink or something, I don't wanna anything to happen.'' Eddie had never heard Richie speak so consciously, but he was glad Richie was also responsible and not only reckless as usual. </p><p>As they were walking, Richie was asking Eddie about Bill's house, so they were casually talking together until they arrived. Eddie attempted to take his own bag back, but Richie didn't let him, so Eddie just went to ring the doorbell instead, and before someone opened the door for them, Mike had arrived as well.</p><p>Mike looked amazing as well. It was funny because he was wearing a short black skirt, a pink tank top, a black wig and had a mustache. He even had shoes with heels and makeup on his face. Just like Freddie Mercury in one of his music videos that Eddie had once seen on television when his mother was not at home. He admired Mike for choosing costume like that.</p><p>The three of them didn't even say a word to each other because Bill's parents opened the door. Eddie knew them, so he greeted them as usual, and Richie and Mike introduced themselves. </p><p>Mike behaved nicely as always, but Richie was acting really differently and politely, and Eddie thought it was weird to see him like that. Bill's parents just smiled at them, and the boys went into the living room where Bill and Stanley were already sitting after Bill's mother let them inside.</p><p>Bill was wearing a costume similar to his own style. He was wearing a flannel shirt, blue jeans and a red vest shirt. He also had sunglasses just like Eddie, and his hair looked the same, however, it was still clear that he went as Marty from Back to the Future.</p><p>Unlike Bill, Stanley was almost unrecognizable. He had a wig on his head. It was a wig for women because he needed to have long blond hair, but it still worked, and he was wearing black eyeliner like Richie. </p><p>He was wearing a blue glitter jacket and black high waisted pants. He looked great. It was probably the hardest costume to make, but Beverly managed to make it look great anyway, so Stan looked pretty similar to the Goblin King from Labyrinth, it was amazing. They all looked great.</p><p>When Bill saw the tree boys entering living room, he got up enthusiastically, and went to greet them. Stan greeted them casually as well, and Eddie pulled out the wrapped present he had for Bill, and gave it to him. Bill then took it, and thanked him. </p><p>When Bill opened the present, he hugged Eddie. It was nothing special, but Bill liked to read comics about superheroes, so Eddie decided to dedicate a collection of comics to him. Bill was overjoyed, so Eddie was glad he liked the gift from him.</p><p>Richie gave him a present as well, and when Bill opened it, it was a cassette with songs. Eddie was not surprised at all. Richie obviously liked music a lot. Bill was also excited; both gifts were of great value to him. Eddie could see it in his eyes. </p><p>After Richie, Mike gave him a cake he had baked himself that had Bill’s name on the top. Bill was completely carried away, and when Eddie was looking at how happy Bill was, he was happy as well. </p><p>After a while, Bev and Ben arrived as well. They both looked great, too. Unfortunately, Eddie hadn't seen the movie with the characters they had chosen to dress as. </p><p>Bev told him that they decided to match their costumes, so they went as two characters that were dating or something like that, Eddie wasn't sure.</p><p>Beverly's red hair was slightly straighter than usual and she was wearing a long brown skirt, long brown boots, a pink T-shirt and had a brown bag in her hand. Everyone was always telling her she looked like the character she had chosen, but Eddie couldn't tell. She told him she had chosen Claire from the Breakfast Club.</p><p>Ben had also chosen a character from the Breakfast Club, his name was John Bender. Ben also had a wig on his head because he had to have longer hair than he normally did. He was wearing a red shirt, a denim jacket and casual denim jeans. There was a red bandana on one of the shoes, which was typical for John Bender according to Bev. He also had sunglasses on his head, just like Eddie and Bill.</p><p>Ben and Bev greeted Bill's parents, and went to give their presents to Bill as well. There was plenty of food and drinks on table in the living room, but nothing alcoholic. Eddie was sure Bill had the beer; he was talking about, hidden from his parents because he knew Bill's parents wouldn't like it if they knew they wanted drink alcohol.</p><p>After about an hour, Bill's parents said goodbye to them and told them to be safe. They also told them to lock the door, the second; the children would stop coming and trick-and-treating. Bill assured them that everything would be fine; after all he was eighteen, so they left.</p><p>When the children stopped coming, Bill locked the door as he was told, and brought the beer. He offered it to everyone, and everyone took one, except for Eddie. </p><p>Eddie didn't like the beer at all. He was also afraid it would end badly for him again, just like before, so Bill offered him a wine they had instead. It was not a fancy wine, but it tasted like a wine juice, and even look like it. Eddie knew it wasn't that strong, so he agreed to drink that after some time. He didn't want to spoil the fun.</p><p>After a moment, Richie stated pulling something out of his backpack, and was smirking at the boys and Beverly. ''I brought this, it's classic and quite themed, what do you think, Bill?'' Richie asked Bill because it was his birthday party. </p><p>''Halloween? I haven't seen that one yet, we could watch it, what do you all say?'' Bill asked with enthusiasm in his voice. He focused his question mainly on Eddie because he knew he didn't like horror movies. Eddie knew Bill would love to see it and it was his birthday party, so he agreed with everyone else after all, even though he wasn't happy about it.</p><p>They all sat down in the living room on the couch and seats that were around. For some reason, Richie ended up next to Eddie, who was sitting in the middle of the couch. Bill sat on the other side of the couch next to Eddie. Ben was sitting with Bev who was sitting in his lap on one of the seats, and Mike and Stanley were sitting on the floor in front of the couch.</p><p>It was almost completely dark outside, and Bill also turned off the lights to make a better atmosphere. Then he gave each of his friends a blanket to keep them warm, and handed them their glasses of beer and wine. After that, he put the VHS Richie brought in the player, and they started watching the movie.</p><p>Eddie was not impressed by that movie, but the last part of the film where Michael Myers killed Laurie's friends frightened him a several times, even though he usually didn’t find this stuff scary.</p><p>When it was time for the final scene where Michael Myers was chasing Laurie around the house, and was trying to kill her, Eddie was so frightened that he accidentally grabbed Richie's hand. They had the blankets on them, so nobody noticed. </p><p>Eddie didn't let go right away, but Richie seemed like he didn't mind because he didn't let go off Eddie's hand either, so Eddie decided to just leave his hand in Richie’s and continue watching, however, thanks to that Eddie couldn’t pay attention to the movie anyway because he couldn't stop thinking about them holding hands.</p><p>When Eddie take a look at Richie, Richie wasn't paying attention to him, he looked unbothered; he was still watching what was going on in the movie. Eddie didn't know if he was holding his hand just because Eddie was frightened or because he wanted to, but he was sure Stan or Bill wouldn't hold his hand like that.</p><p>A few minutes later, the movie ended, and Eddie had no idea what had happened in the movie in the end because he really couldn't focus anymore, but Richie still wouldn't let go off his hand, even when everyone got up, and wanted to move the furniture to make room for games they wanted to play. </p><p>The two boys were just sitting there without talking or looking at each other under one of the blanket, and Eddie didn't know what to do. The rest of their friends didn’t pay any mind to them because they were looking for a game to play.</p><p>The others were already in a good mood because of the beer, including Richie, who told the others he was going to help right away. It could be heard in their voices. Eddie finally decided to let go off Richie who smiled at him after, and they both got up, and went to help. Eddie also decided to drink a whole glass of wine which he had not touched since the beginning of the movie, so he would not be so anxious about what had just happened on the couch.</p><p>Bill announced that he wanted to play Twister after Eddie had gotten up. He turned on the radio next to the television, and the fun began a few minutes later.</p><p>During the time they were playing the game, Eddie was drinking another glass of wine which was more like a juice. Although he felt he had alcohol in him, it wasn't nearly as much as when they were spending night at Mike's place, but he couldn't concentrate on the game at all. </p><p>He kept wondering what had actually happened a few moments ago. Richie acted as if nothing had happened.</p><p>Most of them had already changed into their normal clothes because Mike, for example, didn't want to play Twister while he was wearing a miniskirt. Richie just took off his black velvet jacket, and put on the denim jacket he had at Mike's farm. Eddie just took off his jacket and sweater because he felt like he was on fire.</p><p>They were spending a few hours playing games and dancing, but after a while, Bill decided to show them where to go in case they wanted to go to sleep, and told them he was leaving because he was tired, he didn't mind if they were still there. He then thanked them for a great birthday party, and went to his room where he accommodated Stan and Eddie, as always when they slept over at his house.</p><p>Ben and Bev were supposed to sleep in Bill's parents’ bedroom who didn't mind, Mike was supposed to sleep in Georgie's room, which was empty because Georgie was with Eddie Corconan, and Richie was supposed to sleep on the couch in the living room.</p><p>Everyone was in a good mood, but after Bill decided to go to bed, a few minutes later everyone else decided to go to sleep as well, so they all went to change, brush their teeth, and went to sleep.</p><p>When Eddie was lying down and trying to fall asleep, he couldn't. He tried everything, but he couldn't stop thinking about Richie, so despite wearing his pajamas already, he decided to walk down the stairs to take a look if Richie was sleeping or not. He wanted to talk to him. He still had alcohol in him, so he felt bolder than ever before.</p><p>Bill and Stan were snoring peacefully when Eddie was trying to walk past Stan slowly and quietly before heading downstairs. He was very careful not to make any sound and not to wake someone. </p><p>After some time when Eddie got downstairs, he saw that Richie wasn't there at all. He went to the glass door that led to the garden, and looked outside, and as he predicted, Richie was there.</p><p>Richie was sitting on one of the swings, smoking a cigarette, while looking on the ground, so Eddie couldn't see his face. Despite being in his pajamas, he opened the door, and when Richie heard it, he immediately raised his head. </p><p>He looked at Eddie, and smiled. Eddie walked slowly to him. It was the end of October, so it was already cold outside, and Eddie started shivering, but it didn’t stop him, and came closer to the place where Richie was. </p><p>''Did you mean it?'' Eddie asked before Richie could do or say anything. He wanted to ask before he would lose his courage. </p><p>Richie threw a cigarette on the ground instead of answering, took off his jacket, the same one like he was wearing at Mike’s farm, and gave it to Eddie. Richie hadn't been dressed in his pajamas yet, and he seemed to be outside since the others had left because his cheeks were pink from the cold. He still had eyeliner on his eyelids, and Eddie was thinking about how handsome Richie looked again.</p><p>''Did you mean it?'' Eddie asked again because he wanted to know more than anything if it was true that Richie was giving him those letters, but at that moment he was almost certain it was him. He didn't even thank him for borrowing his jacket; he just looked him straight in the eyes. </p><p>Richie looked like he wanted to run away, but then he sat back on one of the swings. ''I knew you would figure it out… what do you think… look in the pocket,'' Richie said at last. It surprised Eddie, he didn't understand at first, but he did as he was told anyway.</p><p>Eddie reached into both pockets of Richie's jacket, and in one of them was a folded piece of paper, just like the previous ones. Before reading what was written there, he sat down on the swing next to Richie. Then he opened the paper, and started reading:</p><p>I can’t fight this feeling any longer<br/>
And yet, I’m still afraid to let it flow<br/>
What started as friendship, has grown stronger<br/>
I only wish I had the strength to let it show</p><p>I tell myself that I can’t hold out forever<br/>
I said there is no reason for my fear<br/>
‘Cause I feel so secure when we’re together<br/>
You give my life direction<br/>
You make everything so clear</p><p>And even as I wander<br/>
I’m keeping you in sight<br/>
You’re a candle in the window<br/>
On a cold, dark winter’s night<br/>
And I’m getting closer than I ever thought I might</p><p>‘Cause I can’t fight this feeling anymore<br/>
I’ve forgotten what I started fighting for<br/>
It’s time to bring this ship into the shore<br/>
And throw away the oars, forever</p><p>This letter was the longest of all of them. When Eddie finished reading it, he understood everything. He smiled to himself, and looked at Richie again, however, Richie looked terrified.</p><p>''I don't know why I've been doing everything wrong with you since day one, you probably hate me,'' Richie said while he was looking down. Eddie just felt terrible. </p><p>''I didn't mean for this to happen at first to be honest, whatever this is, I don’t even know, I've never felt anything like this before... to anyone... but it's killing me,'' Richie continued still not looking at Eddie.</p><p>''Beverly wanted me to tell you, but I didn't have the courage to do it, instead I sent you stupid lyrics of songs… sorry if it was a stupid idea, I just... I tried to stop thinking about you, but it only made it worse and... if you want we can act like nothing happened.'' Richie was still looking at the ground, and refused to look and Eddie.</p><p>Eddie could tell Richie was struggling to get out what he was feeling. ''Richie... they weren't stupid, I liked them.'' Richie finally looked up, and smiled at Eddie.</p><p>''I just… I'm terrified, I don't know what to do... when I was still living in the city I had a lot... I don't know how to put it… 'love interests', but it never lasted, I never felt anything like this, and I really didn't expect to feel anything like this to you either... I liked you from the first day I saw you, but... when I met you and that day… when we went to the cinema... I really wanted to stop feeling it after that, but instead I drove you away and you thought I was with Beverly… I just messed it up even more....'' That time Richie was looking at him, but Eddie could still see that he was terrified of telling him all of that.</p><p>''I don’t hate you and I won’t hurt you Richie if that's what you are scared of.'' Eddie tried to reassure him because he could see the fear in his eyes, he wasn’t sure what Richie meant or what he was feeling towards him, but something was definitely happening between them. Richie just shook his head. </p><p>''Nah, I will... I'm terrified of hurting you... I can't... I don't know how to do this... you deserve someone who won’t hurt you.'' Richie told him and was looking at him sadly. It seemed to Eddie that Richie truly believed it.</p><p>Eddie decided not to say anything, instead he stood up, and took Richie's hands into his own, and motioned for him to stand up as well. ''Don't say that, I've never felt anything like this to anyone either Richie…'' Eddie started blushing. It was true; he had never felt anything to anyone like that. Eddie wasn't sure what it was, but he liked the way Richie made him feel sometimes. He made him feel the way nobody else could.</p><p>''You can still try, you know, don't be afraid to talk to me or show me how you feel… even if you use your jokes…at least, it's something.'' Eddie laughed at the memory of Richie's attempts of flirting because he realized that day that he really was flirting with him, even though it was really weird way of flirting with someone. </p><p>Richie smirked. ''Okay… you know they say tongue is the strongest muscle in your body right?'' Eddie rolled his eyes at him, but smiled right after. </p><p>''You wanna fight?'' Richie smirked again, and at first Eddie considered walking away from him for joking in that situation, but then he burst into laughter. He didn't mean for him to actually joke about the situation they were in, but Richie obviously took the opportunity to do so anyway. </p><p>''Oh my God... never mind I'm going inside,‘’ Eddie said, but he didn't intended on really going away from the boy who just confessed that he liked him. Richie stopped smirking at him.</p><p>''Okay, sorry, but you are right I have a tendency to joke in serious...'' Richie didn't have time to finish the sentence because at that moment, Eddie came closer to him, and they slightly brushed their lips together.</p><p>It resolved into a kiss. Not innocent kiss, but hot, passionate and demanding kiss. Eddie wanted to pull away, but he couldn’t. His senses have been seduced and he no longer could think straight. </p><p>Eddie opened his mouth a little and gave Richie access and permission to enter his mouth with his tongue. Richie explored his mouth, and suck a little at his lip. In the meantime, Eddie put his hands in Richie’s hair, and Richie pulled Eddie even closer to him.</p><p>Eddie didn't mind that Richie was smoking at the time. He was still a little dazed by the wine and full of adrenaline, so he let Richie lead the way. </p><p>''Eds,'' Richie silently moaned between kissing. Eddie smiled, and his heart was fluttering at Richie's voice, he really did not care about Richie calling him the stupid nickname he had given him at that moment.</p><p>When they broke away after what seemed like ages, they looked at each other, both flushed. Richie then grabbed Eddie's hand, and smiled at him. </p><p>''Was it okay?'' Richie asked him, Eddie realized Richie wanted to make sure everything was fine, and Eddie didn't feel uncomfortable which made Eddie trust his words and him even more. Eddie nodded, and ran his thumb over his hand.</p><p>Eddie could still feel Richie's lips on his own. ''We should go inside.'' Richie pointed out still smiling. Eddie just nodded again, and let him lead him into the house.</p><p>When they were inside, Richie told him that he could keep his jacket, to get some sleep, and that they would talk in the morning. Eddie couldn't bring himself to say anything, so he left without a word. He was shocked. He couldn't believe what had happened in the garden, but he was happier than he had ever been. He was thinking about how quickly everything had changed since he had met Richie.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>LYRICS CREDIT:<br/>More Than Words Can Say by Alias - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pjhrGPFaQoQ<br/>Can't Fight This Feeling by REO Speedwagon - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpOULjyy-n8</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. anything for you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Eddie woke up after having a beautiful dream. After a few minutes, he realized it was not a dream, but a reality. He felt butterflies in his stomach and smiled to himself at the memory of the previous day and the thought of Richie. </p><p>Stan and Bill were still asleep when Eddie had woken up, so he decided to stay in his sleeping bag for a few more minutes thinking about what had happened in the previous days, especially previous hours. He was still wearing the jacket Richie had lent him, and the letter Richie had given him the day before was still in the pocket of that jacket, so Eddie pulled the letter out, and read it again.</p><p>After a while of thinking and smiling to himself, Eddie decided that he didn't want Stan, Bill or anyone else to know what had happened because he hasn't even told them he was gay yet, so he decided to take off Richie's jacket and hide it in his bag; he didn't want Bill or Stan to ask him questions about it or Richie. He wanted to give the jacket back to Richie later when nobody was going to be around. </p><p>After a few more minutes, he decided to get up and go brush his teeth. </p><p>When he wanted to enter the bathroom, Beverly was just coming out of the room. ''Good morn-,'' Beverly didn't even finished what she wanted to say, and started laughing while she was looking at Eddie, so it left Eddie confused. </p><p>''You have something on your face, Eddie, it looks like makeup.'' Eddie blushed because he knew very well how it got there. ''Oh… I…,'' Eddie stuttered because he didn't know what to say to her without telling her the truth about how it got there.</p><p>''I'm going to make breakfast, come downstairs and help me if you want,'' Beverly had said before Eddie came up with an excuse about the makeup he had on his face. Then she smiled at him, and headed downstairs. </p><p>Eddie was just standing there embarrassed for a moment. He was convinced she must have known what had happened. After all, she knew about Richie's feelings for some time. He just didn't know if it was good or bad that she knew about them.</p><p>When Eddie entered the bathroom, he changed from his pajamas, washed his face, brushed his teeth and did everything he needed to do before going downstairs. He was little nervous because he knew he would have to face Richie and Bev again. It wasn't because he didn't want to see Richie, quite the opposite, but he had to pretend that nothing had happened between them in front of the others.</p><p>When Eddie entered the kitchen, Bev and Ben were standing by the stove. They didn't even notice him at first, so Eddie approached them while they were talking about what to cook for breakfast. </p><p>When Bev noticed Eddie had arrived she smiled at him again, and Ben turned around. ''Good morning Eddie,'' Ben greeted him, and Eddie refused to look at Bev, instead he faced Ben.</p><p>''Hi, what are you cooking?'' Eddie asked him. ''Nothing so far... we wanted to make pancakes for everyone.'' Beverly answered instead of Ben. She had amused expression on her face. Eddie was sure it must have been fun for her to tease him silently about Richie. She didn't even have to say anything.</p><p>''Oh, I can help; I actually know a very good recipe.'' Eddie offered help. He also wanted to keep his mind busy with cooking, instead of thinking of Richie who was probably still asleep right next door. Moreover, pancakes were his favorite dish, so he was happy to help. ''Great! Let's get to work then.'' </p><p>The three of them started making the dough and after a few minutes, Mike and Stan came to the kitchen, and started helping them with cooking as well. After some time they were done. </p><p>Eddie went to set up the table next door in the living room, so he knew he would see Richie. He took a couple of plates, and went to place them on the table while the others were washing the dishes and cleaning the mess they had made.</p><p>When Eddie entered the dining room with the table and couch where Richie was supposed to sleep at night, Richie wasn't there, as he had not been there when Eddie had come to see him at night. Eddie took a look outside where they were talking, and then kissed, but Richie wasn't there either, but he decided to start setting the table up instead of looking for him. </p><p>When he was almost finished, someone came up to him from behind. Eddie raised his head and turned around, so he was looking Richie straight in the eyes. Richie was still in his pajamas, his face already washed from makeup, but his hair was still sticking everywhere. </p><p>''Good morning.'' Richie whispered sweetly to his ear, and then took Eddie's hand into his. Eddie immediately wanted to pull away before anyone would come in and saw Richie holding his hand, but before he could do so, Richie handed him another piece of paper, and walked away to the direction he had come from without a word.</p><p>Eddie didn't know what it was, so he opened the paper. He didn't think it would be another paper with lyrics because Richie had already told him what he had wanted, so Eddie was confused again. </p><p>Eddie read the piece of paper, and smiled to himself. Richie's phone number was written there and 'call me' right next to it, so he had tucked the piece of paper in the pocket of his hoodie before the others, including Bill, came with the pancakes to the table.</p><p>Bill greeted Eddie; everyone sat down at the table, and started eating almost immediately. When Richie arrived dressed in his regular outfit again, he sat down opposite to Eddie, and started eating as well. </p><p>When they all were talking and eating, they agreed to go to the Barrens next Sunday, however, before they could agree on the details Richie interrupted them. "Woah! Those are some delicious pancakes, the best I've ever eaten, thanks Fam," Richie said after a moment looking at everyone at the table with a big smile on his face. </p><p>''It’s Eddie’s recipe,'' Bev told him, and smirked at Eddie. Eddie blushed again, not just because Richie was looking at him, but because everyone at the table was looking at him and smiling at him. </p><p>''You gotta show me the recipe, Eds,'' Richie smirked at him as well, and Eddie felt like his face was on fire, he just nodded.</p><p>For the rest of the time while they were eating and talking, Richie was looking at Eddie, but it wasn't the same look he had been giving him before. It was a gentle and caring look, and Eddie occasionally gave him the same look as well, so they linked their eyes together.</p><p>One hour later when they were all full and they cleaned the dining room and living room, they were ready to go home. Eddie still had Richie's jacket in his backpack because he hadn't had a chance to return it to him. He put the letter and the paper with Richie's phone number in a bag with all his belongings, and then he said goodbye to Bill and thanked him for the food and accommodation. </p><p>He also said goodbye to others, and headed home with Stan. Richie didn't go with them because Stan didn't want him to. Stanley told Eddie he wanted to leave before Richie would pack his things up. </p><p>It was a rude and mean thing to do, but at the same time Eddie understood. A few weeks ago, he would do the same thing. Eddie wasn't proud of it, but he really didn't like Richie at first. He was glad it had changed; actually he was more than glad, however, it still hasn't changed for Stan.</p><p>When Eddie got home, he took a shower, dressed in clean clothes, and wondered if he needed to do something for school. He couldn't concentrate at all though. He couldn't stop thinking about Richie, but the truth was that Eddie didn't even know what Richie really wanted from him. It was just one kiss and Eddie still didn't know if Richie wanted to be with him, or if he needed more time. </p><p>Despite of what Richie had told him that night, he still didn't know what Richie expected him to do. Eddie didn't even know what he wanted, but he knew he needed to know what Richie wanted from him. These questions bothered him for several hours, so after some time, he decided to call him. </p><p>He didn't want to deal with it and talk about their relationship over the phone, so he decided to ask Richie to meet him. Eddie had to think a lot about it because he didn't really know what he was going to say and was nervous about calling Richie, but eventually he went to the kitchen where they had a phone, and dialed Richie's number. His mother went shopping, so he knew he had to do it as soon as possible.</p><p>''Hello, Margaret Tozier speaking,'' a woman answered the phone. Eddie was surprised that Richie's mother had answered it; at least he thought it was his mother. For some reason he didn't expect her to pick it up. ''Hello?'' she asked again.</p><p>''Hello Mrs. Tozier, this is Edward Kaspbrak, can I please speak with Richie? I'm his friend from school.'' Eddie was blushing, even though nobody was looking at him. He felt embarrassed and nervous because he was talking to Richie's mother on the phone without even seeing her or talking to her ever before. </p><p>''Oh! Yeah! Of course... let me just... I will get him for you,'' Richie’s mom sounded really excited and a little surprised that Eddie had called, but he thought it was probably because Eddie must have been one of the first friends Richie had made in Derry, so she must have been happy about it. While Eddie was waiting he could hear Richie's mom calling for her son.</p><p>After a while, Eddie heard Richie’s voice: ''Hey cutie-pie, I was taking a shower, I can’t say I wasn’t thinking of you, but when Mags told me you are waiting on the line, it made me…''</p><p>''Oh my God! Gross! Gross! Gross! I'm hanging up.'' Eddie was red like a tomato at that point, not only it surprised Eddie when Richie was talking to him like that, even though it wasn't the first time he said something like that, but Richie's parents were possibly in the same room. Nobody has ever been talking to him this way, so he still wasn't used to it. </p><p>''Relax, kid, I'm kidding, well... maybe,'' Eddie heard that Richie was laughing on the other line. Eddie wasn't even that mad, but he wanted him to stop, especially if his parents were listening. ''Bye..,'' Eddie said, but didn't really mean it.</p><p>''Okay! Wait! I'm sorry, Eds... I didn't know you already missed me; it was barely five hours since you've seen me.'' Eddie could tell Richie was smiling, even though he couldn’t see him. </p><p>''No idiot and don’t call me that, I wanted to talk to you about something,'' Eddie said with seriousness in his voice. ''Okay, I’m listening.'' Eddie heard Richie say, and he sounded little worried, even scared, just like that night when he confessed his feelings to Eddie. </p><p>''Not over the phone.'' Eddie smiled, and could hear Richie sigh in sign of relieve. ''Can you meet me outside in twenty minutes?''</p><p>''Yeah sure, anytime.'' Richie didn't sound that scared anymore, but he sounded serious. </p><p>''Thank you, see you in a bit then,'' Eddie wanted to hang up, but before he did, he had heard Richie say: ''See you, candy cheeks.'' </p><p>The memory of the carnival and the moments when they had first met flashed through Eddie's head because of that nickname. He no longer hated the nickname 'candy cheeks' Richie gave him, but he still hated when he called him 'Eds'. It was like if he called him 'dude', it radiated the same energy. It just didn't sound right to Eddie.</p><p>Eddie took Richie’s jacket because he finally wanted to give it back to Richie, so he put it on. He hoped his mom wouldn’t come home before he would leave because he didn’t want her to ask questions about the jacket or where he was going. He made himself a sandwich before he left and by the time he was supposed to meet up with Richie, he ate it.</p><p>Eddie waited outside of Richie’s house for a few minutes and after a while, he saw Richie opening the main door, and approaching him. ''Hey Eds.'' Eddie was afraid he would take him by his hand or kiss him there, but he didn’t do anything, he just greeted him. </p><p>He really didn't want any neighbor to see them, and tell his mother about them. He wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible, so he started leading Richie away. </p><p>''Hi… come on.'' Eddie was blushing again; he hated how Richie’s presence affected him. He didn't understand why Richie was affecting him so much and why he was so nervous. Eddie thought it was because he has never experienced anything like that and every single thing scared him, but he loved it in a way, too.</p><p>''That jacket suits you, you should keep it,'' Richie told him when they were walking towards a park which was located nearby. Eddie liked that jacket too and he also like how it smelled because the smell reminded him of Richie, but he couldn’t accept it just like that. ''I can’t, I actually wanted to give it back to you.''</p><p>''Yeah?... and by the time you get home, you're gonna freeze to death, it's cold at night... at least borrow it, you can give it back to me whenever you want.'' Eddie realized Richie was right, he didn't think much about that. Eddie just nodded, and they arrived to the small park on the edge of town. Nobody was there, so they had privacy and Eddie just hoped nobody would show up. He didn't want to run into someone like Henry again by a chance.</p><p>They both sat down on one of the benches. Eddie didn’t know how to start the conversations. Richie noticed that Eddie was nervous, so he started instead: ''So... what did you want to talk about? I'm sorry for that phone call, if that's what...'' </p><p>At that point Eddie realized how insecure Richie really was. He also realized that maybe everything he thought about him was a lie; maybe he was actually completely different person under all of the voices, jokes and confident behavior. He wanted to know what he was like. </p><p>He took his hand to assure him everything was okay, and Richie seemed to relax under the touch. ''It’s okay, but please do not talk like that with me in front of your parents.''</p><p>''So... does that mean I can talk to you like that when they are not around?'' Richie raised his eyebrows and smirked at him. Eddie was red again. He let go of his hand, and Richie looked like he was offended, even though Eddie knew he really wasn’t. Eddie frowned at him. </p><p>''Okay, I know, I know… they don’t care anyway… they are used to it.'' Eddie’s face softened and he wanted to say something, but he decided to rather start talking about what he wanted to ask him all along. He still felt like talking about Richie’s parents might have been too personal and he didn't want to cross that line.</p><p>Eddie just turned to him, and looked him right in his eyes. ''I wanted to ask you… what do you want us to be? How do you want this… whatever this is… what do you want from me, Richie?'' Eddie asked him with confidence, but deep down he hoped Richie would take it seriously, and not just as a hook up. Despite Richie telling him the day before that he had feelings for him, he still wasn't sure what he wanted from him. </p><p>Unlike Eddie, Richie didn't hesitate; he smiled at him, and replied right away: ''I would like to take you on a date, if you want to of course… I mean… Can I? Can I take you out?'' For some reason this was the answer Eddie didn’t expect, but wanted to hear more than anything. It was like a dream to come true. Eddie was aware of the fact that they could not go to the public, at least he wouldn't dare. </p><p>Eddie actually didn't even know if Richie was out. He didn't even know if Richie was gay, he had been sure Richie liked girls before, but he wasn't so sure at that moment. He didn't know, but he didn't want to ask him just like that.</p><p>After all the thinking, he considered telling Richie that he couldn't go, or at least tell him to go somewhere without other people. However, before Eddie could say anything, Richie continued: ''We don't have to go to dinner or cinema… or whatever... I found a pretty cool place here in Derry and literally nobody goes there.'' </p><p>Eddie was sure Richie saw the fear in his eyes and seemed to understand that Eddie was not comfortable showing affection to other boy in public. He could also tell Richie wanted to reassure him that it was fine and safe, but by what Richie had said, Eddie knew he wouldn't make him feel uncomfortable. </p><p>''I’ll go.'' Eddie decided to say after all. It was actually all he wanted at that moment. He trusted Richie.</p><p>Richie’s eyes lit up and he was clearly happy. ''Do you have time on Saturday then?'' Eddie was thinking for a few seconds, and then nodded. ''I'll pick you up at four in the afternoon, is it okay?''</p><p>''Ummm… okay, but can you just pick me up here? My mom would not like it if... you know,'' Eddie didn't know what exactly she wouldn't like, but probably everything. He already knew she didn't like the new neighbors without even meeting them and she wouldn't like it if she knew Eddie made a new friend or more than a friend. She didn't like when something changed and when Eddie changed. </p><p>''Yeah, of course, whatever you want.'' Richie smiled at him. ''Thanks, Rich,'' Eddie smiled at him back, and was very thankful for him. </p><p>Richie seemed to understand and didn't even ask him about it. Eddie thought Richie must have known he didn't want to talk about it or his mother because he didn’t ask him further questions about it. ''Anything for you.''</p><p>After that, they were sitting there while they were talking about the town and school until they started complaining about the dark and cold, so they decided to leave after a while, and when they reached the street where both boys were living, they just casually said goodbye.</p><p>For the rest of the evening, Eddie tried to do some homework because he barely touched anything that weekend, but for the first time in his life, it didn’t bother him. He couldn’t stop thinking about Richie, and thankfully his mother came home just a few minutes after him, so she didn't even know he hadn't been at home the whole time.</p><p>The following week at school was extremely boring according to Eddie. He got to see Richie a couple of times, but they haven’t talked much. They were mostly just staring at each other. Eddie was sure Bev knew about them because every time she caught them looking at each other, she giggled. </p><p>Eddie also noticed that Richie stopped talking with Greta and the rest of the girls which made him happy. He was convinced he would not be able to just ignore him after what had happened between them. </p><p>Bill and Mike later invited both of them to their soccer match which was taking place on the other side of town on Friday, and all of their friends agreed to go to support them, including Eddie, even though he didn’t know anything about soccer.</p><p>Before Eddie left for school on Friday, he told his mother he would come home later than usual because he was going to the soccer match. She didn’t like sports just like Eddie, not only she did not like when Eddie played sports, but she didn’t even like when he wanted to watch the matches. She was always telling him it was too violent and she didn't want him to go to the matches because she thought that a ball would be thrown at him which was very unlikely. </p><p>Eddie actually listened to her because it was one of the things they had agreed on, but he still wanted to go and support his friends on that day, so when she told him exactly the same thing that morning, like she always did, he just ignored her wishes, and told her he was going anyway.</p><p>Later at school when he had a Chemistry class, the teacher assigned the students projects in pairs. Eddie and Dorsey immediately paired up. The students got two weeks to complete it, and then they were supposed to present it in front of the whole class which Eddie didn’t like at all, but at least he was with someone who he felt comfortable to present it with. </p><p>Eddie and Dorsey agreed that they would meet up after school next week, and they would start working on it. Eddie was curious about how Dorsey’s house would look like, but that was the only thing he was looking forward to. He wasn’t in a mood to do some stupid project, but it was very important. It was one of the most important projects they were supposed to do in senior year.</p><p>Later in the afternoon, when Eddie and Stan were heading together to the other side of the town where the soccer match was supposed to take place, they found Richie, Bev and Ben who were already seated in the auditorium the moment they had got there. </p><p>Eddie and Stan sat down next to their friends. Eddie didn't sit down next to Richie because he knew it would only provoke him and the others would notice something was going on. </p><p>Eddie could see Mike and Bill in their soccer gears on the field already. There were also cheerleaders and he even recognized one of them. It was Sandy.</p><p>Nothing interesting happened during the match. Stan and Eddie were not interested in the game at all and did not even know what was going on which was quite paradoxical because their best friend has been playing soccer for several years. </p><p>Richie tried to look like he knew what was going on, but he clearly didn't either. The only ones cheering hard and enthusiastically were Bev and Ben.</p><p>The match ended and the home team won which meant that Mike and Bill's team won. After the match, Eddie saw Bill going to the locker room, but he also noticed something else. Mike and Sandy were talking about something. </p><p>Normally Eddie wouldn't pay any mind to something like that, it wasn't his business, but that time it looked like they were both upset. </p><p>After a while, Mike smiled at Eddie and the others, and went after Bill to the locker room. Eddie thought it was probably nothing serious. He didn't think much of it. </p><p>Then Eddie and the others went to wait for Mike and Bill, they congratulated them, and left home together.</p><p>When Eddie got home, he couldn’t wait for the next day, but at the same time he was nervous, not that much anymore, but he still was. He was really excited and curious about the place Richie was talking about, but he knew he had to wait.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. princess, your carriage is waiting</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>On Saturday morning Eddie was preparing for his first date in his life. He was really looking forward to it; he couldn't wait to finally be alone with Richie again.</p><p>Eddie had told his mother before he started getting ready that he was going out with Bill. She hasn’t been thrilled because Eddie has been going out and spending time outside more often, but she knew she wouldn't be able to keep Eddie home anyway, so she hadn’t argue with him about it. </p><p>When Eddie went to get ready, he started by thinking about what he should wear. At first, he wanted to wear Richie's jacket again, but he changed his mind, and decided to wear his own clothes in the end, even though Richie had told him before that he liked it when Eddie was wearing his jacket.</p><p>Eddie decided to put on plain light blue jeans, a white sweatshirt and a blue-and-white windbreaker. It was a simple outfit, but Eddie felt good and comfortable in it. He had no idea where he was going with Richie or what they were going to do, so he really just wanted to feel comfortable.</p><p>A few minutes before four o'clock in the afternoon, he took everything he thought he needed, said goodbye to his mother without telling her when he would be back, and left for the place where Richie was supposed to pick him up. He was nervous, but also really excited. He just hoped everything would go well.</p><p>When Eddie got to the place where Richie had asked him out and where Richie had agreed on picking Eddie up, he sat down on the bench. Eddie didn't know what time it was, but after a while, a black car Eddie recognized in matter of seconds stopped right in front of him. </p><p>Richie opened the door of the car from the driver’s seat where he was sitting, and got out, the engine was still running, but before Eddie could do or say anything, Richie opened the door on the other side for him. </p><p>''Hello, princess, your carriage is waiting.'' Eddie started blushing at the fact that Richie had called him 'princess', but he tried to mask his pink cheeks with a frown, even though he actually liked the way Richie had called him that time. Then Eddie greeted Richie, and got in the car. Richie closed the door behind him, and went to sit down on the driver's seat again.</p><p>Richie looked amazing in Eddie’s opinion. He was wearing black skinny jeans, black shirt with a picture of a band he didn't recognized, brown-black Hawaiian shirt, and brown jacket. He had bandana in his hair. </p><p>Richie was also wearing eyeliner, not as much as before when he was supposed to look like Robert Smith, but it was still noticeable. Eddie couldn't stop looking at him because he really thought that Richie had never looked better before.</p><p>When the two boys were seated in the car, Richie hasn't driven off yet; instead he was staring and smiling at Eddie. ''You look amazing,'' Richie just casually said, and smirked at Eddie, and then he finally started driving away not waiting for Eddie’s response. </p><p>''Thank you, you look great, too,'' Eddie said genuinely, and smiled back at him, ''Where are we going?'' Eddie asked few seconds later when they were already on their way to the place Eddie knew nothing about. </p><p>''It’s a secret, you will see.'' Richie smirked again, but he didn't look at Eddie this time because he was looking at the road and was paying attention to what was going on in front of him, so Eddie didn't want to disturb him, however, they exchanged a few words along the way anyway.</p><p>Richie has been driving south for about ten minutes, and then he drove off the main road onto a forest path near the Barrens. After a while, Richie stopped, and parked the car on the side of the path in the forest. </p><p>Eddie was still wondering where was Richie taking him, but before getting out of the car he had admitted to Richie that he has never really been to that place before. </p><p>It was true; Eddie did not like to go to the forest because there were mosquitoes and ticks, so he has never really gone there. At first, he even hated going to the Barrens, but he had gotten used to it after a while.</p><p>When Eddie got out of the car, Richie opened the trunk, and started taking out a few things. Eddie didn't know what he was doing and why, but he was patiently waiting for Richie without asking him any questions about it. </p><p>When Richie closed the trunk, and locked the car, he had a big bag in his hand. He approached Eddie with a smile on his face. Eddie smiled back at him, so Richie took his hand in his, and started leading him somewhere without saying anything. </p><p>There was only a single small path in the forest, and Eddie genuinely had no idea where they were going, but he didn't want to be annoying and ask Richie about it again, so he didn’t say anything.</p><p>After a few minutes, they reached the place. Eddie realized that they must have been somewhere high because he could see the forest and the Barrens from the place they were standing. Eddie could even see a part of the town where Mike lived, so he realized they must have been standing on the cliff. </p><p>In the moment Eddie had realized where he was, he had gotten naturally scared because he was still a little afraid of heights, so he let go of Richie's hand, and stopped following him. All the horrible stories his mother had been telling him when he was little flashed through his mind.</p><p>''Hey, it’s okay, trust me.'' Richie obviously noticed Eddie's hesitation, so he stopped, but he still didn't want to let go of Eddie's hand, so he grabbed his hand again, he wanted to reassure him that everything was fine, and Eddie let him, but still didn't move. </p><p>After Richie has been trying to reassure Eddie that he can trust him with his eyes and touches, Eddie let himself be led by Richie again. Richie stopped a few feet from the edge, let go of Eddie. He was still standing by his side though, and then he pulled something out of the bag he still had in his hand.</p><p>Eddie noticed what Richie was doing and realized that the thing Richie pulled out of the bag was a blanket. In that moment, all the fear left his body and was replaced with admiration and surprise again. Eddie was a little taken aback by that because he found Richie's idea really romantic. </p><p>As soon as Eddie came to his senses, he decided to help Richie out, so he started helping him spreading the blanket out on the ground, however, he was still careful about not going too close to the edge of the cliff. After the blanket was ready and spread on the ground, Richie took out some food and drinks, and placed them on it.</p><p>When everything was ready, they both sat down on the blanket. ''How did you find this place? I've never been here, and I've lived here since I was born.'' Eddie giggled because it was absurd that Richie had only lived there for a few months and found a place like that. </p><p>''Oh… let's just say I'm amazing,'' Richie said, and smirked at Eddie. Eddie laughed at that comment, but then he rolled his eyes because he knew Richie was avoiding the real answer again. Eddie could already tell when Richie was doing that. </p><p>However, Richie seemed to notice that Eddie wanted to know how he actually found that place, so he decided to change his answer after all: ''Well, I found this place by total accident, my pops and I had an argument... like the other day… ya know... and I needed to get out of that house, and ended up here.'' Richie shrugged, and started opening the boxes with food he had brought. </p><p>At that moment, Eddie also realized that they were really getting to know each other more and more because they were starting to understand each other. </p><p>Eddie could tell when Richie was just joking around, avoided topics he didn’t want to talk about or pretended to act differently than he would normally act, and Eddie could tell that Richie knew when Eddie was really mad at him, when he was just joking around just like Richie or when he was really hurt by what Richie or others had told him. </p><p>Eddie actually couldn’t be happier about it because it also meant Richie was really trying to make it work between them and be honest with him, and Eddie liked when Richie was opening up to him because he didn't do that often.</p><p>''Oh, I’m sorry about that thing... with your dad.'' Eddie still didn't know anything about Richie’s parents, but from what he had heard and saw so far, he knew Richie didn't have the best relationship with them, at least not with his father. </p><p>''Don't be, we just don't get along, but it's not a big deal.'' Eddie could tell just by that one sentence that Richie felt uncomfortable talking about his father, so he decided to drop the conversation about him; instead he approached Richie, and took Richie's hand into his again. Richie smiled, and moved closer to him as well. </p><p>They kissed. It wasn't passionate kiss like the last time when they kissed in Denbrough's garden, but it was a sweet and tender kiss. It had a hidden meaning. Eddie wanted to let Richie know he was there for him, and Richie actually seemed to understand, and smiled again during the time they were kissing.</p><p>Later when they were talking, eating the food Richie had prepared and kissing from time to time, Eddie was really enjoying everything about the time they were spending together. It was just them sitting there with that amazing view. He was no longer afraid, at least not when he was with Richie and siting on the blanket, but after a few minutes, Richie got up, and started taking off his jacket and shoes. </p><p>''What are you doing?'' Eddie asked confused. ''I'm going for a swim,'' Richie announced, and smirked at Eddie. </p><p>''Are you crazy? It’s November! It’s cold, you will get a sick.'' Eddie got up as well; he couldn't believe his eyes and ears. He thought Richie was joking at first, but when Richie took off his T-shirt, and started unbuttoning his pants, Eddie realized he wasn't. </p><p>Eddie immediately started looking at other places than where Richie was, but it didn't stop him from talking and trying to convince Richie to go back, and sit down. </p><p>''You can get pneumonia and die, plus how do you want to get into that water?'' Then Eddie realized. ''No! Absolutely not! You don't want to jump there, do you?'' Eddie asked, but at that time, he looked directly at him with worry in his eyes ignoring the fact that Richie was almost naked in front of him.</p><p>Richie smiled at Eddie. He stepped closer to him. Eddie started blushing again when Richie got closer because it was strange to watch Richie stand almost naked in front of him. However, Richie looked really unbothered by the fact he was only in his briefs, he actually seemed to be enjoying himself, unlike Eddie. </p><p>''It's not so cold today, it's one of the warmest last days of this year, so it would be a shame if we didn't take an advantage of it… don't you think?'' Richie was looking at him innocently, like if he didn't know he was making Eddie extremely uncomfortable, but Eddie could tell he was smiling inside.</p><p>''Oh no, not at all... I'm afraid of heights if you haven't noticed,'' Eddie couldn't believe his eyes and ears again. For a second it seemed like Richie was making fun of him.</p><p>''I know... why you think I followed you on that Ferris wheel the day we have met?'' Richie asked him with a smirk, and Eddie was taken aback by that question. He knew Richie had followed him there, but it has never occurred to him that the reason why he had so rudely jumped between him and his friends was because he knew Eddie was scared and had been sitting there alone.</p><p>''What?'' Eddie asked confused, he wanted to know what he meant by that. ''Yeah… I wanted you to think about something else… well it worked, didn’t it? You hated me after that, but it worked, I know you can do this as well, it's not that high, it's lower than that Ferris wheel, but you don't have to do it if you don't want to, okay?... I was just messing around... I just know you can, I'm sure you can do anything if you set your mind to it, you are braver than you think, Eds.'' Richie smiled at him and intertwined their fingers. Then he rubbed his thumb over Eddie's knuckles.</p><p>''I... you... are you serious? How did you know?'' Eddie couldn't even think straight. He didn't expect that at all. He was mad at himself for thinking he had just wanted to piss him off back then, but more than anything he was impressed by him. </p><p>Richie was an amazing person, Eddie remembered that Beverly had told him that Richie had been the only person who wouldn't refuse to help her, he believed it, and he understood why she had said that. ''I just knew it, kid.''</p><p>''I didn’t… I’m sorry, I was such a jerk to you.'' Eddie felt really bad. He wanted to show Richie that he no longer think anything bad about him, but he knew it would take some time. ''It’s okay, I honestly understand.'' Richie was still smiling at him and rubbing his thumb over Eddie's knuckles.</p><p>Eddie just nodded, but instead of saying anything else. He let go of Richie's hand, walked a away from him, and started undressing. Richie was looking at him with amused expression. </p><p>''Can you… not stare at me,'' Eddie said shyly. It made him uncomfortable when Richie was looking at him like that, but when he told him not to stare Richie laughed quietly, and turned around. </p><p>When Eddie was in his briefs, he approached Richie to let him know he was done, and Richie turned around again. Richie took his hand, and led Eddie to the edge. </p><p>For some reason Eddie really wasn't that scared and afraid anymore. It was not that high and he no longer thought about the stuff his mother had told him when he was younger at that moment, his only thoughts in his head were about Richie. The only thing that bothered him at that moment was that he had to jump into the cold water. </p><p>''Are you okay? You don't have to do this if you don't want to, ya know,'' Richie looked at him worriedly, but then gave him an encouraging look.</p><p>''Nah it’s fine, but if I get sick, I'll make sure you won't live to see another day,'' Eddie was joking, however, he really didn't want to get sick because it would mean, he would have to go to the hospital and spend time with his mother. Richie just laughed at his remark, and nodded. </p><p>They both were standing on the edge of the cliff while they were holding hands. Eddie really wasn't scared anymore, he wanted to jump. It wasn't because of Richie, but rather because of himself, he wanted to prove that Richie was right and he could do it. He trusted him and he trusted himself for almost the first time in his life.</p><p>After a while, they jumped into the water together. The water wasn't as cold as Eddie had imagined. When they were both wet, and only their heads were peeking out of the water, Richie was looking at Eddie with worry again. </p><p>''Are you okay?'' Eddie laughed. ''Never better, I can't believe I did it, I jumped!'' Eddie started laughing even more, and Richie started spraying water on him. Eddie started spraying water at him in return, and it turned into a battle.</p><p>After a while, Eddie noticed that Richie's eyeliner was blurred, so he wanted to wash it off from his face. He swam closer to him, and Richie seemed to think he wanted to attack him again at first, but when he saw Eddie's expression, he stopped swimming away, and looked at him confused. </p><p>Eddie stopped right in front of him, and stood up. They were close to the shore at that moment, so he was standing on his tiptoes. Eddie placed his hand on one of Richie's cheeks, and started touching his cheeks with his thumb. Richie stood over him because he was taller than him. </p><p>When Richie noticed that Eddie had trouble reaching for him because he stood on his tiptoes, he picked him up, and let him wrap his legs around his stomach, instead of bending down.</p><p>Eddie didn't protest and continued to run his fingers over Richie's face. Richie was just watching him. ''Your eyeliner... it was...'' Eddie was looking at him straight in the eyes, but suddenly couldn't get a whole sentence out of his mouth.</p><p>Richie just smiled sweetly again, and before Eddie could finish the sentence, Richie kissed him passionately. Richie started running his own hands over Eddie's back while holding him at the same time in the same position. Eddie still had his legs wrapped around Richie's stomach, but his hands were free. </p><p>When Richie started kissing him passionately, Eddie put his arms around Richie's neck, and started kissing him back. It was a little bit messy because they were all wet and still in the water, but despite of the water being little cold, Eddie felt like he was on fire. He felt Richie everywhere.</p><p>The first time they had kissed, he had let Richie be in the control of their kiss and allowed his tongue to explore his mouth, but this time he invaded Richie’s mouth, and Richie gladly let him. Eddie bit into his lower lip, and Richie moaned. </p><p>Eddie could feel how Richie grown bigger under him, so he decided to move away from his lips. Richie took the opportunity, and started sucking and kissing on Eddie’s neck. That time Eddie moaned, and also moved his hands into Richie’s hair. He completely forgot Richie still had a bandana on his head, so he accidentally took it off of his hair. </p><p>Richie stopped sucking on his neck, and looked at him, flustered. ''You really like playing with my hair, don’t you, kid?'' Richie asked jokily. Then, before Eddie could say anything, Richie had taken the bandana Eddie had in his hand, and wrapped it around Eddie's head, and then he cupped his cheek.</p><p>Eddie didn't say anything and let him do it, then he attempted to get down from Richie, but Richie didn't let him. Instead, he started walking to the shore while still having Eddie wrapped around his waist. </p><p>''We should go,'' Richie whispered to Eddie’s ear, and Eddie was still trying to get off him, but unsuccessfully. ''Then let me go.'' They were almost out of the water and Eddie could feel the cold on his back, but he was still pretty warm because Richie didn't want to let him go of him. </p><p>Richie kept walking out of the quarry, and then to the path that led upwards where they had left all their belongings. Eddie started laughing. "Well, you said you didn't want to get sick, so I'm keeping you warm," Richie explained, and Eddie no longer protested. He clung to Richie's neck, and felt like a child being taken to bed by a parent when the child had fallen asleep somewhere.</p><p>When they reached the top, Richie took out the second blanket he had in his bag with only one of his hand, and wrapped it around Eddie. He placed him on the other blanket. Eddie wanted to protest, but Richie started walking away still wet. </p><p>He was walking towards the place where he had parked his car before. He didn't even have shoes on. Eddie was just standing there covered in a blanket not moving thinking about what Richie could go for.</p><p>After a few minutes, Richie was walking back to Eddie with another bag and a towel around his shoulders. When he reached Eddie, he gave him another towel that he pulled out of the bag he had just brought. </p><p>Eddie took it, and wrapped it around himself. Then he sat down on the blanket that was dry, except for the place where he was standing for a few minutes. </p><p>Richie joined him after a while, and was just grinning at him the whole time, so Eddie's cheeks started turning pink again, it wasn't because he was cold, he actually wasn't, but it was because he was thinking about how he had passionately made out with Richie just a few minutes ago. Then he took the bandana off his own hair, and gave it to Richie.</p><p>''So... was it so terrible?'' Richie asked him suddenly, and then he started eating the food they had left there. He also offered it to Eddie who took it before answering. </p><p>When Eddie wanted to answer, he started thinking about what his mother had been telling him and how she had been warning him about everything, and in that moment, he decided to tell Richie about her. He believed him; in fact he was sure he started caring for him, maybe even falling in love with him. </p><p>"No...'' Eddie said simply, but wasn't finished; he just didn't know how to start talking about his mother. </p><p>It was hard to try to explain her behavior to other people, they either pitied him or didn’t understand, but he knew he wanted Richie to know. He wanted him to understand and know about his life. Richie actually saw it in Eddie’s face, so he looked at him confused. </p><p>''What’s wrong?'' Richie asked, but sounded insecure. Eddie didn't want him to feel like he did something wrong again, so he decided to just tell him: ''You know... I don’t know how to tell you this, but… I don’t want you to think I’m coward, well I'm kind of...  but...''</p><p>''I don’t think you are a coward, Eds, on the contrary actually.'' Richie smiled at him, but Eddie could still see a worry in his eyes. </p><p>''Well… you didn't know me when I was younger... now it's not like that, but I have been called many names in the middle school, sometimes even now, 'the sick kid', 'the kid who can't do anything', 'the little coward' or 'the freak','' Eddie was explaining sadly after he remembered all those times someone had called him that way.</p><p>''I don’t care, I don’t think that, I see it’s not true, besides... it was years ago,'' Richie looked at him with reassuring smile again. ''Yeah, but I just wanted you to know… I’m still scared of many things and the reason...'' Eddie couldn't even finish the sentence, and Richie spoke up: ''Your mother.''</p><p>''Yeah, how do you know?'' Eddie looked at him with confusion again. It seemed to him like Richie knew him already, even though they had never talked much. It was strange to Eddie, but he was also relieved because Richie seemed to understand, and Eddie was afraid he wouldn't. ‘’Well, Bill mentioned that you have... difficult... mother, he didn’t say anything specific because he knew it wasn’t his place to tell me, but I figured.’’</p><p>''Oh, yeah, I avoid talking about her because he made me do a lot of embarrassing things and I was afraid of everything because of her, she even made me take pills I didn’t need, I don’t even have asthma, she just tricked me into thinking it, instead I developed panic and anxiety attacks as a defense mechanism, and every time those attacks occur, I need my inhaler.'' </p><p>Eddie was feeling much better when he could finally say it to someone who seemed to understand and actually listen to him. Bill and Stan also understood and knew about it, but they just pitied him most of the time. Richie didn't look like he pitied him; he looked more like he was curious, even mad about it. ‘’Like… after that thing with Bowers?’’</p><p> ''Oh, yeah… I’m so messed up in so many ways… I just...'' Eddie felt ashamed. Then he looked down, and refused to look at Richie again. </p><p>''Eds... come here,'' Eddie didn't move, instead Richie came closer to him, ''you are not messed up, if anyone is, then it’s her, I myself have problems with my parents, I’ll tell you about it... someday, but this doesn’t change anything, it doesn’t define who you are okay,'' he took Eddie's hand again, he started rubbing his thumb over his knuckles, just like before.</p><p>‘’Thanks Rich, I just wanted you to know... you would find out anyway, so I wanted to tell you because there is so many stuff and you would probably think I’m a freak or embarrassing or something.'' Eddie still refused to look up; instead he was looking at their hands. </p><p>''Stop it! You are amazing! Do you realize who are you talking to? I’m mister of being ‘embarrassing’,’’ Richie said, and let go off Eddie's hand, in attempt of standing up furiously.</p><p>Eddie finally looked up, and before Richie could get up, he had grabbed his hand and motioned for him to sit down again. ''Fair point, Trashmouth… amazing actor though,'' Eddie smiled, almost laughed. Richie pretended he was hurt, but then he came closer to Eddie, and started laughing with him. </p><p>Then he started tickling him. Eddie was extremely sensitive to tickling, so he started laughing even more and moving like crazy, especially because they both were still almost naked, but already dry. ''I’m kidding, stop!... Richie! Stop!''</p><p>Richie stopped after a moment, and a serious expression appeared on his face again. ‘’You know I was actually always thinking about trying theater, but it’s embarrassing, I have never told that to anyone.’’ Eddie smiled at him softly. He wasn't that surprised about Richie wanting to act, he was more surprised about the fact that Richie was embarrassed about it. ''Wait, really?''</p><p>''Yeah… you know forget it,'' Richie waved his hand like it's nothing, and shrugged. ''Richie… that’s amazing! Seriously! You should try for the school play next month.'' </p><p>Eddie always admired people who could act, but he wasn't one of them. He had even gone to see some of the plays in which students were taking part in the past which often helped them to get into college afterwards. It was a different play or musical every year, Eddie was sure Richie would be amazing if he tried for some roles.</p><p>‘’I don’t know… I’m not the best at remembering stuff; I mean it needs a lot of focus and patience… I don’t know’’ Richie looked like he regretted telling Eddie about it, so Eddie, this time, wanted to reassure him it was okay, and actually great idea. </p><p>''You just told me I can do anything if I set my mind to it, doesn’t it apply to you, too? You can at least try, I know you would be great.'' Richie smiled at him. ''I’ll think about it, '' he said after all.</p><p>For the next few minutes, they sat there, eating and talking, and after a while, they decided to get dressed, and head back home. After all, it was November, so it was already getting dark and cold.</p><p>When they got in the car, Eddie instructed Richie to drop him off where he had picked him up before. He really didn't want to raise unnecessary questions and glances from neighbors or his mother. </p><p>Richie agreed without questions, and started driving. They didn't talk much along the way. Eddie was preoccupied with his thoughts wondering what would happen next, he didn't know if Richie wanted to be with him officially, as a couple or not, however, Richie looked like he was thinking hard about something as well.</p><p>After a moment, they arrived at the place where Richie had picked up Eddie before. Richie stopped, turned off the engine, but did not get out of the car and didn't say anything, so Eddie wanted to get out of the car, but first he decided to ask him what he was thinking about the whole time on their way home. </p><p>''Richie… do you want to be with me? I mean what you want us to be?'' Eddie didn't even look at him when he had asked him. He was afraid of the answer, he really liked Richie at that moment, so he hoped Richie wanted to be with him. He hoped it was not just a hookup for him, but he wasn't sure. He wanted to know.</p><p>Richie didn't answer for some time, so Eddie finally looked at him. It was dark already, so he didn't have a clear view at him, but he could tell Richie was smirking at him. ''I want you in so many ways that I can’t even put into words, Eds.'' </p><p>Eddie turned red at his words, and smiled at him. He was relieved, but then a serious expression appeared on Eddie’s face again because he still wanted Richie to know that he wanted a serious answer from him. ''Richie….''</p><p>''I already told you… just say and I'm yours.'' Eddie remembered when Richie had told him that for the first time back when he had offered to drive him to school in September, and felt ashamed because he also remembered the way he had reacted. ''Does that mean you want to be with me?''</p><p>''Of course I want to be with you," Richie smiled at him, and took Eddie's hand into his once again, "I never wanted anything and anyone more... but it also means that I can drive you to school in the morning… the offer is still up.'' Eddie smiled at him again, and nodded. ''Okay, but I will wait at the end of the street, at half past eight?''</p><p>''Uhhh… why so soon? It only takes ten minutes.'' Richie asked, but when he saw Eddie’s expression, he stopped asking, and nodded. Eddie had no further questions, so he let go of Richie's hand, and wanted to get out of the car, but Richie stopped him.</p><p>''Wait… I wanted to ask… um… okay, you can say no, I won't be mad or anything, I just wanted to ask you… well, my parents are going to the city for the whole weekend next week so I was wondering… would you want to sleep over at my house?'' Eddie didn't hesitate, and nodded without thinking. ''Yeah, of course.''</p><p>''Great!'' Eddie could tell Richie was really happy about it. ''Okay! I will let you know the details next week, kid.'' That time Eddie didn't want to leave Richie just like that, so he leaned to him over the lever, and gave him a quick kiss on the lips. Nobody was around and it was dark, so Eddie risked it because normally during the day in a public place, he would not do it. </p><p>Richie smiled through the kiss, and managed to say: ''Goodnight, boyfriend.'' Eddie pulled away, and stepped out of the car without a word. Richie then turned on the engine, and drove off before Eddie could recover from the fact that Richie had called him 'boyfriend'. He realized that they were a couple from that very moment.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. have fun with that lad</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Eddie was waiting for Richie exactly on time according to the plans they had made on the weekend. While he was standing not far away from his own house, he realized that he hadn't even told Stan that he wouldn't walk with him to school in the morning. </p><p>Stanley had actually called him to tell him to come to the Barrens after Eddie's first date with Richie, but it still hadn’t occurred to Eddie to tell him that Richie would give him a ride to school, but what had occurred to him was that he had promised Ben and the others to help them build the club house the following weekend, but Richie had asked him to sleep over at his house on that same weekend. </p><p>Eddie had considered calling the sleepover at Richie's house off, but he had decided against it after all, he had decided he would apologize to the others and spend time with Richie instead. </p><p>It was a little selfish thing to do, but he hoped Ben and the others wouldn't mind if he missed one day at Barrens with them. He also hoped it wouldn't be suspicious that Richie wouldn't be there either. </p><p>While Eddie had been thinking about why exactly he did not want anyone to know about him and Richie spending time together, he had also finally decided that he had to tell his friends that he was gay. He really thought they should know, especially after he and Richie started dating. </p><p>Eddie was also aware of the fact that he and Richie couldn't act like nothing was happening between them in the future, so he knew that their friends just needed to know. </p><p>He actually didn't know if Richie was okay with telling them they were together just yet, but he wanted to at least tell them he was gay. He planned to do it the next time they were going to be together, probably at the Barrens again.</p><p>Eddie was replaying all of that and the last couple of days in his head while he was still waiting for Richie to arrive, and he didn’t forget to make a mental note to apologize to Stan as soon as possible for not telling him he would not walk with him to school, but it was not such a big deal after all, at least Eddie thought it wasn’t. </p><p>After a while, Richie distracted him from his thoughts because he had stopped his car right in front of Eddie. When Eddie came to his senses, he opened the door, and got inside. </p><p>''Hey.'' Eddie smiled at Richie, and Richie started slowly driving off. ''Hi Eds, did you have any dreams about me at night… any wet dreams?'' Richie smirked at him while he was still looking at the road, and driving like he didn’t just said the most impolite and inappropriate thing ever. </p><p>''Eww gross! Shut up!...'' Eddie wasn’t happy about his question, ''…or I would reconsider dating you.'' Richie laughed at him because he knew Eddie wasn't serious, in fact, he looked like he had expected a comeback from Eddie like that. </p><p>They had exchanged a few more sentences during the ride and had made some plans for the weekend before arriving in front of the school, so Eddie agreed that he was going to spend the night at Richie’s house from Saturday to Sunday. </p><p>Richie parked the car in the parking lot; they got out of the car, and started walking towards the school together. Bill and Stan haven't been there yet, and Eddie was glad because he didn't want to explain to them why he had suddenly gone to school with Richie, but he still wanted to apologize to Stan for not walking to school with him, that hasn't changed. </p><p>However, Eddie wasn't sure what he would tell him because he couldn't just tell him he had gone to school with Richie. Mainly because Stan still didn't like him. He knew Stan would definitely ask him why they suddenly started talking and hanging out together, and Eddie didn't feel like answering that question.</p><p>Later when Eddie had a Chemistry class, he also made plans with Dorsey because they still had to work on their project on Friday. Dorsey wanted to start working on it at the weekend at first, but Eddie told him he would not be able to make it, so they decided to start working on it on Friday instead. </p><p>They decided to prepare and make everything at Dorsey's house, so they wanted to go there right from after the school would be over. Eddie was still glad he was going to do the project with him and not with someone he didn't know at all, but he was still nervous about it because he would have to present it in front of the whole class including Henry.</p><p>The rest of the day wasn't interesting at all, however, Eddie still hadn't apologized to Stan because he hadn't seen him all morning, but he hoped it wouldn't be a problem. </p><p>Stan went to a meeting with his club in the afternoon, so he hadn’t seen him after school either. He told himself that he would call him later, but he had his head full of Richie, so he had forgotten about it in the end.</p><p>On Tuesday Eddie was looking forward to seeing Richie again. He was waiting for him at the same time and place as before, and Richie was surprisingly on time. </p><p>Richie was actually a pretty decent driver. It seemed to Eddie like he had been driving for years. Eddie, on the other hand, was sure he wouldn't be that good. He knew he would be too nervous and afraid to drive, so he knew he would never be a good driver, but he admired Richie for it. </p><p>On the way to school the boys agreed that Richie would drive him to school every morning since that day. Eddie knew he still had to explain it and apologize to Stan somehow because he had forgotten about it when he had come home on Monday, so he planned on doing it that day.</p><p>At school when Eddie had a free period, he met up with Bill, Mike, and Richie at the cafeteria. Everyone was eating their lunch at the table together except for Richie, as usual. He was just sitting there. Eddie still didn't know why he didn't eat lunch at school, but that time he actually cared, so he decided to ask him and possibly talk to him about it later. </p><p>''I wanted to tell you something… Sandy and I are no longer together, we broke up last week after the soccer match,'' Mike suddenly told them with no visible expression on his face. </p><p>Eddie didn't know Sandy very well, but he had gotten the impression that they hadn’t fit together from the first day he had seen them together, but he wasn't, by no means, happy about it, he didn't want his friend to be sad. Eddie actually noticed that something was off between them that previous week, so he wasn't that surprised about it. </p><p>Eddie, Bill and Richie didn't say a word at first; they were just looking at him with pity in their eyes instead. ''I just wanted you to know we're not together anymore, it’s not a big deal.'' Mike started smiling at them; he didn't seem to be upset or sad, so Eddie was happy about that. The last thing he wanted was seeing Mike, who was always happy and bringing joy to their friend group, sad.</p><p>''Oh I'm sorry, man.'' Richie looked at him still without a smile; he seemed to be genuinely sorry. </p><p>''It's fine, we didn't understand each other to be honest, I liked her a lot, but I don't think I loved her, so I'm not sad about it.'' Mike smiled at everyone again, and Bill reached out to him, and put his hand on his. </p><p>''I'm s-sure you'll find someone you will f-fall in love with, Mikey.'' Bill smiled at him, and let his hand rest on Mike's hand. Eddie just nodded in agreement.</p><p>After that, Eddie also mentioned to them that he was going to meet up with Charlie again. He had been actually thinking about what Charlie had told him the last time he had talked to her, so he didn't feel as bad as he had felt last time. On the contrary, he was quite excited which had surprised him. </p><p>He still had no exact image of his future in his head, but after getting together with Richie, for the first time in his life, it seemed to him that his life would make much more sense. </p><p>He still knew it would be very difficult to talk to his mother about what he wanted his future to look like, but he no longer saw it as impossible, rather unlikely to happen. She didn't even know he was gay. Eddie couldn't imagine what she would say to him if she knew, but he was convinced that she certainly wouldn't like it.</p><p>Later when all his classes were over, Eddie was waiting in front of Charlie's office for her to call him inside. After a while, she opened the door, and motioned for him to come inside and sit down in the same place as before. </p><p>''Hello Eddie, how are you today? You seem to be happier than usually.'' She smiled at him and seemed to be thrilled and surprised about the fact that Eddie was happy. </p><p>Eddie was indeed happier; he was just a little surprised because she could have read him so easily. ''I'm happier actually, thank you for asking.'' Eddie smiled back.</p><p>''I'm happy to hear that, did something happen or did you just sleep well today?'' Charlie asked him jokily. She obviously didn't even expect Eddie to answer because her smile has been washed off her face when he did. </p><p>''Umm… I think I'm falling in love,'' Eddie didn't mean to tell her that at first because he still didn't fully trust her, but he didn't want to lie to her either. It wasn't harmful or unsafe because he didn't plan on telling her he was falling in love with a boy and not a girl; he was a teenager after all, so it wasn't anything unusual.</p><p>''Oh, really? I'm happy for you Eddie, I hope she would treat you well!'' Charlie then smiled at him again, and Eddie just nodded. Then she opened her notebook, wrote something inside, and looked at him again. ''Have you been thinking about what I told you last time? I know it's probably fresh with that girl, but have you... possibly... thought about what would your future with her look like?''</p><p>''Umm... maybe… I mean I know I would like to live with someone; it would be nice if it was…her... but I don't know, I was actually also thinking about what I would like to do in the future.'' It was more like what he would enjoy doing than what he would like to be doing to Eddie because he still didn't plan on leaving Derry; he was just thinking about it. </p><p>''Yes? And what would that be?'' Charlie was clearly happy about Eddie's response and the fact that he was taking it somehow seriously. </p><p>''Psychology,'' Eddie said simply. He was looking at Charlie proudly, even though he knew it was just a dream and not an actual plan. ''That's amazing! I saw that you chose the AP Psychology class for this year, it will come in handy, and you already have really good results from your SAT, so that's great...''</p><p>Charlie wanted to continue encouraging him, but Eddie stopped her before she could. ''Well… yes... I was thinking about it, but I did not say that I would just go and leave my mother here, I still...'' That time Charlie interrupted Eddie. ''Eddie, I'm sorry, but did you try talking to her about this, about the university, maybe?''</p><p>''No, I know she wouldn't take it very well, she was always telling me about the time when I would graduate and we would live here together, this would break her heart.'' Eddie felt nauseous while he was imagining how badly it would go if he tried actually talking to her about it, or telling her he was gay. ''Would you try it at least?''</p><p>''I don’t know, it’s not a good idea.'' Eddie really didn't want to talk to his mother about it and didn't like where that conversation was going. He no longer felt comfortable. </p><p>''What would you do, Eddie, if you were still with that girl and she would want to move to university, would you stay here, and just break up with her?'' Eddie thought for a moment about running away from that office. He didn't want to think about it, he was avoiding thinking about his best friends leaving him; he didn't want to imagine Richie leaving him as well. </p><p>''I don't know... okay... well, I'll try... I know what you think, it sounds awful that she controls me like this, but it's not as awful as it sounds, she is just lonely,'' Eddie stared excusing his mother's behavior because he actually really felt bad. He didn't know if she was really that lonely, but no other reason came into his mind as to why she would want him to stay with her.</p><p>''Eddie…'' Charlie tried to speak up, but Eddie still felt like she judged him and he felt really uncomfortable. ''No really…'' Eddie really wanted to explain to her that his mother was not that bad, so he continued. ''Eddie...'' That time she sounded more serious, and Eddie stopped talking. </p><p>''It's okay, everyone has different parents, I know it's hard to talk with people about serious topics and it might create conflicts, but it's important when it comes to your future... in fact, I hope you have someone in your life who you can trust, perhaps that girl or a friend?'' She raised her eyebrows in a question. Eddie just nodded, and actually felt better after what she had said to him.</p><p>Thankfully, she didn't want to continue with the conversation about his mother, instead she wrote something in her notebook, and then smiled at him again. ''I want you to visit me again in a month; it might be for the last time, okay?'' Eddie nodded again without a word. </p><p>Charlie then led him out of her office. Eddie left without another word and was glad he could go home.</p><p>Given the fact Eddie went to see Charlie, he knew he wouldn't manage to talk to Stan after school again. Although he had an AP Biology class that day with him, he didn't manage to talk to him, mainly because Stanley seemed like he didn't want to talk to Eddie. </p><p>Eddie knew he was upset, so he knew he really needed to talk to him and explain it to him somehow. Eddie also knew he would actually have to tell him that he would stop walking to school with him in the morning, so he knew he would have to talk to him the next day whether Stan would like it or not. </p><p>He didn't want them to fight again like when they were in the middle school. They both were stubborn, and he knew it would be hard to reconcile with Stan if they fought again.</p><p>On Wednesday Eddie was in class with Richie and Bev in the morning, and Greta and Sandy were there as well, which was no surprise.</p><p>Eddie entered the classroom with Richie that day because they were going to school together, and Eddie went to his seat in front of the classroom as always. Richie smiled at him, and went to his seat which was in the back behind Bev. Bev wasn't there yet, however, Greta and Sandy were. </p><p>As soon as Greta saw Richie, she went after him. Eddie saw her going after him, and it scared him for a moment. He was afraid that Richie would flirt with her again. </p><p>After all, they were a couple at that point, just not publicly. Eddie had noticed that Richie was no longer flirting with girls the previous week, but that didn't comfort him much. He was wondering if he should even turn around to look at them because he didn't know if he wanted to see what was going on there. </p><p>In the end he decided to turn around. As soon as he did it, he saw Greta heading back to her seat; she seemed to be angry and upset. Richie smiled softly at Eddie, and started taking something out of his backpack. Eddie smiled back at him, and happily turned back again. </p><p>Eddie realized that Richie had probably told Greta to leave him alone. Eddie loved the fact that Richie did that more than anything. He was really falling in love with him.</p><p>After a few minutes, Bev entered the classroom. She smiled at Eddie, and sat down behind him as usual. Then Eddie's eyes ended on Sandy. He was wondering if she was sad because she had broken up with Mike, but she didn't seem to be upset. </p><p>She was laughing at something Greta was telling her, and she had a smug expression on her face just like Richie usually had, especially when they were at school. Eddie was really curious about Richie and what he was really thinking inside his head because he knew that Richie was actually overacting a lot in school and didn't show his true self, Eddie couldn't wait to get to know him better.</p><p>In the afternoon when the school was over for the day, Eddie didn't know if Stanley would be waiting for him after Eddie ruined it between them, made him upset and hadn't even apologized, however when Eddie went to the spot where they had been normally meeting up before, Stan was waiting there with an absent expression on his face, he was staring in the direction from where Eddie was approaching him. </p><p>Stan greeted him, and started heading home without another word. Eddie greeted him as well, and started following his best friend. </p><p>Before Eddie could say anything, Stan asked him: “Are you mad at me?'' Eddie was confused at first, he didn't know why he thought that, but he understood that he hadn't given him any explanation about anything and just stood him up on Monday. ''No! Not at all… umm... I...'' </p><p>''Oh, okay,'' Stan said sadly, and didn't ask further questions. Eddie felt bad, but he didn't know what to say because he couldn't tell him about him and Richie. </p><p>''Umm... I apologize for not letting you know... but I can't... I won’t be going to school with you anymore,'' Eddie had never felt worse, but he really didn't know what else to say because he didn't want to lie to him and not explaining it to him was better option than lying.</p><p>''I figured.'' Eddie could tell Stan was mad at him, he wanted to explain it to him so badly, but he couldn’t, at least not yet. He even considered started going with him again, but it was the only time he could be alone with Richie because they usually didn't have time after school and they couldn't really talk or hold hand at school or anything else, so he didn't want to give it up. Also Richie would have been hurt as well if he stopped going to school with him. </p><p>Eddie was in a very bad position, he just hoped Stan would stop being mad at him eventually. After all, it wasn't a big deal; they still saw each other at school and after anyway, but it probably was a big deal to Stanley because the next day, Stan didn't show up after school. </p><p>Eddie didn't even know where he was or if he was still mad, but he didn't want to worry about him. He hoped it was nothing, and he would simply see him the next day.</p><p>Eddie's birthday was on Friday. When he saw Richie in the morning, he did not mention it to him. In fact, Eddie was pretty sure Richie didn't even know about it because he had never talked about his birthday in front of him, nor did he plan any celebration.</p><p>Bill, Mike, Bev and Ben wished him happy birthday at school. They even gave him some presents, but they didn't make a big deal out of it, and Eddie was happy about it because he didn't like much attention. He was also happy because he was finally eighteen which meant that his mother could no longer use his young age as an excuse to keep him at home. </p><p>He hadn't seen Stanley all day, not even at lunch where he was actually supposed to be, so Eddie thought he was probably sick. He understood that he was mad at him, but he didn't want to think about the possibility that he avoided him on his own birthday. He couldn't go home with him after school anyway because he was supposed to go to Dorsey's house, and work on their project, so he wasn't worrying about him much longer.</p><p>When Eddie was heading to the place he had agreed to meet up with Dorsey at after school was over; they greeted each other, and started heading for the place where Dorsey lived. Before they managed to leave the school property, someone grabbed Eddie’s arm, and stopped him form walking, so Eddie turned around to see who it was.</p><p>''Hey Eds, can we talk?'' Richie turned to Dorsey, eyed him, and turned back to Eddie, ''alone?'' Eddie nodded. </p><p>''This is Dorsey, my classmate, we are going to work on a chemistry project together today... and this is Richie, my… friend.'' Eddie didn't know why he felt like he needed to explain who Dorsey was to Richie, but he did, even though it was a little bit awkward. Dorsey held out his hand for Richie to shake. </p><p>Richie looked unimpressed, but shook it. ''Nice tae meit ye,'' Dorsey said in Scottish accent, and Eddie noticed that Richie smirked at him. Richie liked impersonating people, especially people with different accents, so Eddie already knew where that was going.</p><p>Eddie then told Dorsey to go ahead and wait for him near the Derry Mall. Dorsey nodded, and left without complains leaving the two boys standing there alone, and then Eddie turned back to Richie. ''Um… I have something for you, I wanted to give it to you in the morning, but I didn’t find the right words… well, I still didn’t find them, but...''</p><p>''Richie,'' Eddie stopped him because he saw he was nervous, he wished more than anything to take his hand, and reassure him that everything was okay, but he knew he couldn’t. </p><p>''Yeah, okay,'' Richie took something out of his backpack. It was a box wrapped in wrapping paper; he held the box in one of his hands, ''happy birthday!'' Richie blushed. It was the first time Eddie had seen Richie blushing.</p><p>''Oh my God… how did you know? You didn’t have to give me anything.'' Eddie took the box, and wanted to open it; however, Richie put his hand on it, and stopped him. ''Not here.'' </p><p>Richie started pulling another box out of his pocket, and then gave it to Eddie as well, ''This is also a part of the gift, unpack it at home, and you'll tell me tomorrow if you like it at least a little bit, or not.'' Eddie took the smaller box also wrapped in a wrapping paper. He took a look at both of the boxes, listened to Richie, and put both of the boxes in his backpack. </p><p>Then he decided to at least hug Richie. He hoped hugging him wouldn't look too suspicious, he didn’t see many people around anyway, so he risked it. He lunged himself at Richie, and Richie was obviously taken aback. </p><p>''Thank you babe,'' Eddie whispered to his ear. After a few second, Richie picked himself up. ''Babe? I liked that; you're welcome, kid, see ya tomorrow, okay?'' Eddie nodded, and they let go of each other, ''and I hope yer’ gonna have fun with that lad.''</p><p>Eddie rolled his eyes at Richie’s attempt of Scottish accent, and walked away to Dorsey who was still waiting for him. Eddie turned around to Richie one more time, and saw Richie was still looking at him with a smirk on his face. Eddie smiled at him, and continued walking to Dorsey who was looking at him as well. </p><p>Dorsey didn’t say anything about Richie or the gifts, he looked like he actually didn’t pay any mind to Richie; instead he motioned for Eddie to get going. Dorsey led the way and they were heading towards the part of the town where Bill lived. </p><p>They weren't talking for couple of minutes, but Eddie didn’t even realize it because he couldn’t stop thinking about Richie and the gifts he had given to him. ''He seems like a good lad,'' Dorsey looked at Eddie, and smiled at him. ''He is.''</p><p>After a few minutes, they arrived in front of the small house. It was a small house, but it was still little bigger than the house where Eddie lived with his mother. </p><p>Eddie followed Dorsey to the door, and after Dorsey opened the door and motioned for Eddie to go inside, he found himself in a small hallway. Dorsey gave Eddie a brief tour of the house because nobody seemed to be at home when they arrived, and after a while, they got to work. </p><p>Since their project also involved testing and mixing chemicals, they were also spending some time in the garden. Eddie enjoyed the time with Dorsey. He was a little different from his other friends, but they really got along very well. He was glad to be in class with him.</p><p>Eddie didn't know much about him, but Dorsey mentioned to him that he only lived with his father and his little brother. Dorsey and his brother's biological mother had stayed in Scotland and they did not have a good relationship with her. </p><p>Eddie noticed a photo on the wall as he was walking down the hallway that led to Dorsey and his brother's room. He saw that their father was very similar to Dorsey and his brother. They looked like a nice family, and for a moment, Eddie started feeling sad because he was thinking about what it would be like if his father was still alive, but he forgot about it quickly.</p><p>When it was time for Eddie to go home because he wanted to be home before his mother would come home from work again, they were about halfway through testing, so they agreed to do the rest the following week on Monday. </p><p>They said goodbye to each other, and later when Eddie was walking past Richie's house, he remembered the conversation he had with Richie and the gift from him which he had in his backpack. </p><p>Eddie saw Richie's car parked in front of the house, but he didn't see anyone in the window or anywhere near the house. He was looking forward to opening the presents from Richie, so he didn't hesitate, and started walking quickly towards his own house.</p><p>Fortunately, when he entered the house, Edddie’s mother was not home, so he went to his room right away, and took both presents from Richie out of his backpack. He didn't even change into his clothes he was wearing at home; instead he started opening the bigger box. </p><p>Eddie also really appreciated the way Richie had wrapped it because he could tell that Richie cared about the way it would look like. Eddie also remembered how nervous Richie was, but he knew that whatever was in the box, he would like it.</p><p>Eddie removed the wrapping paper, and carefully opened the bigger box. At first, he couldn't believe his eyes. He knew right away what it was. He had always wanted to buy it for himself, he even asked his mother once, but unfortunately, he has never got it, until that day. He was really thankful to Richie. </p><p>It was the newest type of Walkman Eddie had always wanted. His mother had never wanted to buy it for him, so he had just been listening to the music on the radio, but he could have never listened to what he wanted. After a while when he took a good look at it, he realized there were also headphones with it, so he tried them on. </p><p>Then he quickly remembered that Richie had given him another gift. Eddie immediately figured out what it was because it was a smaller box in size of a cassette tape. The only thing he didn't know was what was on it.</p><p>When Eddie opened the small box, the cassette was indeed inside. There wasn't a cover, so Eddie understood that it was probably a cassette tape on which Richie had recorded the songs himself. </p><p>Eddie took a look at the cassette to make sure there wasn't anything written on it, but he really didn't find anything. There was nothing left to do but to listen to the tape. Eddie took his new Walkman with headphones and a tape, and went to lie down on the bed. He put his headphones on his head, and inserted the tape into the Walkman.</p><p>After a moment, Eddie closed his eyes and hit the ‘play’ button. The first song started playing. </p><p>At first, he thought he didn't know the song, but after a few seconds he realized he did knew it. Not only was it a song by Elton John, but it was also a song he had heard in The Lion King movie for the first time when Eddie and his friends went to Aladdin to watch that movie. </p><p>Eddie started feeling butterflies in his stomach at the memory of that day. The memory of Richie and him dancing together flashed through his mind. Eddie didn't know what kind of other songs were on the tape, but he already knew it was the most thoughtful and wonderful gift Richie or anyone could ever give him. It was as if he had given him the memories captured on the cassette.</p><p>When the first song ended, the next one started. Eddie immediately recognized the lyrics, and knew it was one of the songs with the lyrics Richie had given him on a paper. </p><p>In fact, all of the following songs were songs with the lyrics Richie had given him. They were arranged in chronological order on the cassette tape from the moment they were in the cinema until Bill's party. It was so romantic, and Eddie was really speechless after he had heard all of them. </p><p>He was lying down on the bed thinking. After a moment, he got up and decided to clean up the wrapping paper and hide everything he got from Richie before his mom could see it. He knew she would ask him unnecessary questions about who had given it to him and she wouldn't like it.</p><p>When he wanted to throw away the paper in which the presents were wrapped, he noticed a piece of paper where something was written that he had not noticed before. He took it and started reading:</p><p>Happy Birthday, Candy Cheeks!</p><p>I hope you liked my present for you, I thought that you should have your own music player.<br/>I made a mixtape of songs as you can see.<br/>I just hope those songs mean as much to you as they mean to me.<br/>Here is the list if you didn’t know their names (just in case):</p><p>1. Elton John – Can You Feel the Love Tonight<br/>2. Toto – Afraid of Love<br/>3. Bad English – When I See You Smile<br/>4. Frankie Valli – Can’t Take My Eyes off You<br/>5. Alias – More Than Words Can Say<br/>6. REO Speedwagon – Can’t Fight This Feeling</p><p>Love, Richie</p><p>The note made Eddie smile and he started feeling butterflies in his stomach in matter of seconds again. He put the letter to his heart and couldn’t stop smiling to himself. He made a mental note in his head to tell and show Richie how thankful he was. </p><p>In that moment, he heard his mother to enter the house, and call for him. Eddie quickly put all the things and the letter to one of the drawers, and headed to the kitchen to greet his mother.</p><p>When Eddie saw his mother, she had a birthday cake in one of her hand for him. She wished him happy birthday, they cut a piece of the cake together, and ate it. Eddie was then spending the rest of the day with his mother, but he couldn't wait to go to bed, and listen to the mixtape Richie had made for him again.</p>
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<a name="section0018"><h2>18. beep beep Richie</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Eddie had made plans with Richie to come over in the afternoon after lunch on Saturday. Richie's parents were supposed to leave for Augusta on Friday and they were not supposed to be in town until Sunday afternoon. </p><p>Eddie wasn't surprised that Richie was left alone at home, but he wasn't used to it, given the fact, his own mother wouldn't leave him alone for more than a few hours at home. </p><p>Eddie still felt like he was a child, it bothered him, but no matter what he had told his mother, she was still treating him like when he was younger. Eddie was convinced that she would not like it when he would tell her that he might want to leave her and study at university, so he had decided to wait until she would be in a good mood to tell her because she surely wasn't that Saturday morning. </p><p>Eddie didn't know if it was because he had told her he was going to sleep over at Bill’s house again because they wanted to celebrate his birthday, which was a lie again, or not, but he knew he would wait for another moment.</p><p>When Eddie had woken up in the Saturday morning, he started working on his essay for the AP Psych class which he was supposed to hand in on Monday. He knew he wouldn't have time for that later and he already couldn't concentrate because he kept thinking about Richie. It was noon when he was done with it, and his mother called him for lunch.</p><p>After Eddie was full, he went to get ready. He started packing everything he thought he would need while he was wondering if he should also take the Walkman Richie had given him for his birthday with him, but in the end he decided to leave it at home and hide it somewhere so his mother wouldn't find it because he knew she often searched his room. Fortunately, he had several places in his room where he had already hidden a few things including the letters from Richie, and she didn't know about them.</p><p>When Eddie had everything he needed in his backpack, he changed into better and more representative clothes because he didn't want to go to Richie's house in sweatpants. Then he went to say goodbye to his mother, and told her that he would come back the next morning. </p><p>At first, he had expected her to give him another lecture on how he didn't spend any time with her anymore, but she just said goodbye to him, and told him to be safe, so Eddie took his backpack and a jacket, and left. </p><p>Richie had told him in advance to ring the bell when he would arrive. Eddie hoped that his mother would not see him going to the house that was just a few feet from their house, but he believed she wouldn't because when he had left, she had been sitting on the couch in the living room watching TV as usual which meant she wouldn't pay much attention to him.</p><p>When Eddie was walking to Richie's house, he remembered that the rest of his friends were probably at the Barrens at that very moment. Eddie had apologized to them in advance for not coming, and fortunately, the others didn't mind. He didn't want to lie to them, but he needed to come up with an excuse because he had to give them a reason why he wouldn't be there that day, so he had told them he was going out of town with his mother, and the others understood, however, he also promised to come there the next weekend. Eddie didn't know what Richie had told them, but he was sure he had made an excuse as well.</p><p>Less than a minute had passed and Eddie was standing in front of the door of Richie's house. He was nervous, but he knew he couldn't stand there for too long because he didn't want some of the neighbors to notice him because they would most likely tell his mother where he was about to spend a night at, so he rang the bell without a further thought.</p><p>After a while, Richie opened the door for him while he was glowing with happiness from the moment he had laid eyes on Eddie. ''Hi babe,''’ Richie greeted him, and Eddie could already see that he wanted to grab his hand, and kiss him, but before Richie could do anything, Eddie walked quickly past Richie, and stepped into the house. Eddie knew deep down that the neighbors wouldn't probably notice him, but Eddie didn't want to risk anything. He was just paranoid. He had always been.</p><p>When he stepped inside, he put down the backpack he had on his back, and turned back to Richie who had already closed the door behind him and was still grinning at him. Eddie knew that what he had done was rude, but Richie seemed to understand and didn't mind, and Eddie was grateful for that, so he approached him. ''Hi,'' Eddie took Richie's hand into his own, and kissed him sweetly, ''I’m sorry.''</p><p>''It’s okay, Candy Cheeks, I understand,'' Richie ran his thumb over Eddie's cheek, ''don’t worry about it, okay? Come on, I will show you my room.'' Richie took the backpack Eddie had placed on the floor and motioned for him to follow him. Eddie recovered from the kiss, and quickly followed Richie. </p><p>Eddie realized he hadn't even looked around at what it looked like inside of the house where Richie lived because he had rushed inside. He was in a large corridor at that very moment and at the end of that corridor were stairs leading to the next floor. </p><p>To the left from the corridor was an entrance to what looked like a dining room, and Eddie could see that there was also a door leading to the porch and a large garden. To the right from the corridor was also an entrance to the room which seemed to be a huge living room. Eddie could only see a part of the room, but he didn't want to be noisy, so he just continued following Richie upstairs.</p><p>When Eddie came upstairs, he found himself in another corridor. Richie opened one of the doors that were there, and entered the room. Eddie wanted to follow him, but before he did, he had noticed that there were photos on the wall. </p><p>Eddie stopped, and went to look at them. He noticed that there were usually three or two figures in the photos. A small child with glasses was on most of them and Eddie immediately recognized that it was Richie. </p><p>Eddie guessed that the other two people in the photos were Richie's parents. He had seen Richie's father before, but only from a distance, so he didn't have a chance to look at him properly. He had only noticed that he had similar features to Richie. He was tall and had as dark hair as Richie and glasses.</p><p>Eddie saw Richie's mother on one of the photos for the first time in his life. Richie's mother was similar to Richie as well. She had long wavy brown hair, lighter than Richie's hair, but just as wavy, in the photos taken when Richie was a toddler. </p><p>In those that were taken later, she had her hair cut short. She had a lot of freckles on her face just like Richie and the same eye color as Richie. They looked like a happy family, they were mostly laughing or doing some fun activity, but most of the photos were from the time when Richie was a baby or a little kid. </p><p>Eddie was wondering why they didn't have any pictures from the time when Richie was older, but since Richie had told him they didn't have a good relationship, or at least not with his father, he understood that something must have happened between them later in their lives, but he didn't want to ask Richie because he knew he would tell him about it when the time would come.</p><p>After a moment while Eddie was still looking at the photos, Richie peeked out of the room he had entered just a few minutes before. ‘’Have you already got lost, Eds?'' Eddie just smiled at him, finally turned to him, and followed him into his room. </p><p>When he entered the room, he was amazed at how big it was. Eddie saw the street from the window and knew it was the room where he had seen Richie the day he had found out Richie had moved into that house. </p><p>On one side of his room, Richie had a huge closet, a desk, and a shelf with a tape recorder, lots of vinyl records and cassette tapes. Eddie wasn't surprised because he had expected it; he knew how much music meant to Richie. Richie also had his own radio on the desk. </p><p>There was a huge bed, on the other side of the room. He also had a lot of posters on the walls all over the room. Most of them were posters of rock bands. Eddie didn't recognize most of them, only some, but only two huge posters right above his bed caught Eddie's eye. </p><p>One of them was a man Eddie didn't know, but he had looked just like Richie on Halloween, so he guessed it was Robert Smith. There was a woman in the other poster. Eddie didn't know her name, but he knew she was one of the women form the Baywatch series. Eddie has never watched it, but his mother did, so he knew it was one of them, it was the one with long dark hair.</p><p>Eddie suddenly felt insecure. He knew that Richie was not only attracted to men like he was, so when he saw the huge poster with that woman on the wall he started feeeling insecure because he didn't understand why Richie wanted to be with him when he could easily date a woman like her. His thoughts immediately shifted to the fact that Richie might have not mean it or didn't expect their relationship to last long. </p><p>While Eddie was thinking, Richie came up to him, and hugged him from behind. ''What are you thinking about?'' Eddie didn't answer. ''I will let you sleep in my bed at night, okay?'' Richie asked him instead, and kissed him on the neck while his arms were still wrapped around Eddie's waist. </p><p>Eddie luckily suppressed his previous thoughts, and turned around. He put his arms around Richie's neck, and looked straight into his eyes. ''No, I can't let you sleep on the floor in your own room.''</p><p>''It's okay, I was sleeping there for the first few weeks before we brought all the furniture here after we moved, I'll be fine,'' Eddie raised his eyebrows, ''seriously, don't worry, Eds.'' Richie smiled at him, and kissed his cheek, but the moment he pulled away, Eddie attacked him, and they started passionately kissing while Eddie was leading him to the bed. </p><p>When they pulled away, both boys were completely flushed while they were just sitting there trying to catch their breaths. ''What was that for?'' Richie smirked at him, and raised his eyebrows in a question.</p><p>''I wanted to thank you… for that birthday present, I have never gotten a better and more meaningful gift,'' Richie looked at him skeptically, ''no really, it means a lot to me, Richie, I can't even tell you how much, thank you.'' </p><p>Eddie hugged him around his waist like a little kid. Richie started stroking his hair, and after a moment, he gave him a gentle kiss in his hair. ''You’re welcome, babey.'' </p><p>They stayed like that for a few minutes, and haven’t spoken a word to each other. Eddie was really enjoying that moment. He was convinced he would fall asleep in that position if he didn't move soon.</p><p>''How did it go with that lad yesterday? I hope you haven't cheated on me already.'' Richie was obviously joking, but Eddie didn't find it funny, he pulled away from him, and looked at him in the eyes. ''Don’t say things like that!'' </p><p>Richie reached out to Eddie, and intended to touch Eddie's face, but Eddie put his hand away, ''I’m serious, it’s not funny, you know I wouldn’t do that, right?'' Richie smiled at Eddie, but Eddie could see a worry in his eyes. ''I know, I'm joking, kid.''</p><p>After that they didn't talk about that anymore and rather got up. Richie started showing Eddie his collection of tapes and vinyl records. After a while, he put one of the tapes into the radio. </p><p>While Richie was telling him about all the music and the singers he liked, Eddie noticed that Richie had a psychology textbook on his desk. He didn't know how Richie was doing in that class, but he knew that Mr. Carson didn't like him. He started wondering if Richie had already started working on the essay they were supposed submit on Monday. </p><p>He didn't want to ruin the atmosphere and start talking about school, but it was important to him because Eddie didn't want Richie to get bad grade because he was spending time there. He cared about Richie, so he decided to ask Richie anyway.</p><p>''Have you already started working on your essay, Richie?'' Eddie smiled at him, but Richie’s face darkened. ''Eds… I don’t want to talk about school today.'' Eddie came closer to him, and looked him right in the eyes. ''But I don’t want you to get a bad grade just because I’m here today.'' </p><p>Richie looked confused, but then he smirked at Eddie. ''It's nice of you, you're like my knight, I feel like a princess now that....,'' Eddie could tell Richie was avoiding the question again and desperately wanted to change the subject of their conversation. ''Beep beep Richie.'' </p><p>Richie started laughing. ''Really, Eds?'' Eddie rolled his eyes, and wanted to start telling him about the way he was avoiding the question again, but Richie seemed to understand even before he started. ''Okay, okay, I get it… I wasn't planning on doing that essay, happy?.''</p><p>''Why? Do you know that Mr. Carson will let you fail or perhaps repeat the year again if you don't do the work he assigns you?'' Eddie was actually pretty concerned about him; he didn't want him to be in trouble at school. </p><p>''Gee, Eds, I know… I just… I don’t understand this topic okay… I usually don’t study much, but this subject is hard for me, besides... Mr. Carson hates my guts, so it doesn't really matter.'' Richie smiled, but Eddie wasn't happy about his attitude, but he still wanted to help him. ''Heyyyy, it’s okay, do you want me to help you? I could tutor you and help you with that if you want?''</p><p>''Would you really do that for me?... I just don't know if I would be able to focus when you would explain it to me while looking at me like this, all handsome and cute.'' Richie was smirking at him again, and Eddie blushed at Richie’s words. ''Shut up... yes.'' Richie just laughed, and cupped Eddie's pink cheeks.</p><p>Richie later pulled a mattress out of the closet, and put it on the floor along with a blanket and a pillow. Eddie helped him prepare it, and offered him to sleep there again because he didn't want him to sleep on the floor while he was going to sleep on his bed, but Richie still protested.</p><p>When everything was ready, Richie told him that they should go downstairs and he would cook dinner for them. Eddie was surprised, he expected him to order pizza or something else, but he had no idea he wanted to cook for them, so Eddie nodded, and they went back downstairs.</p><p>Eddie followed Richie down the stairs into the room where he though the dining room was. When he entered the dining room, he found that the dining room was connected to a large kitchen. The kitchen looked amazing, Eddie didn't know if all the furniture was from their old house or if it was new, but the furniture seemed to be really modern. </p><p>Richie went to the cupboard, and started taking the dishes out, and placing them on the table. Eddie followed him, but he only watched him. ''I hope it will be okay with you if I cooked spaghetti, I can't cook anything else than pasta to be honest, we can still order something....'' Richie seemed to be ashamed, but he didn't look at Eddie. ''It’s fine, I didn’t expect you to cook, it’s nice, how can I help?''</p><p>Richie started pouring water into a pot, and then he put it on the stove, and lit the fire. He turned around, and smiled at Eddie. ''It’s just spaghetti, Eds, there is no need to help me.'' </p><p>Richie turned around again, and went to the fridge, and then he started taking some stuff out of it. Eddie saw tomatoes and some other stuff, so he guessed it was for the sauce. ''Well, I can at least set the table, I don't want to just stand here and watch.''</p><p>''Don't tell me you don't like what you're looking at,'' Richie pointed at himself, and smirked at him again, Eddie just rolled his eyes, and then Richie laughed, ''the plates are in that cupboard and the cutlery is here.'' Richie pointed at the cupboard and a drawer. </p><p>Eddie opened the cupboard, and pulled out two plates. He took them to the table, and then he took spoons and forks from the drawer, and put them on the table as well. ''Where do you have glasses?'' Eddie then asked. Richie didn't even look at him because he was busy with chopping the tomatoes, but still answered. ‘’In the living room next to the fireplace, it's across the hall.''</p><p>When Eddie entered the living room, the first thing he saw was a huge fireplace at the end of the room. A bookcase and two large display cabinets were right next to the fireplace. There was also another door leading somewhere, so Eddie guessed there was either a bathroom or a basement, but he had no idea. In the middle of the room there was a couch, two armchairs, and a coffee table. There was also a television that was a little bigger than the one Eddie had at home.</p><p>Eddie walked over to one of the display cabinets. He pulled out two glasses, and wanted to go back to the dining room, but he noticed that there were other photos of Richie he hadn't seen before on the shelves, so he stopped what he was doing, and started looking at them. </p><p>There was a photograph that looked like it had been taken recently, probably at school. Richie looked almost the same. Eddie started wondering why Richie had to repeat the year again. He realized that there was still a lot of stuff he didn't know about him, but he didn't want to pressure him into telling him. </p><p>After a moment, he headed back to the dining room before Richie would start looking for him again. When he entered the dining room, Richie was already putting pots with food on the table. ''What do you want to drink? We have juice, water of course, or wine, that's not a problem... ?'' </p><p>Eddie vividly remembered the time he got drunk, and he didn't want to experience it again, so he shook his head. ''Juice is okay.'' Eddie went to clean the glasses, and then he set them on the table. Richie, meanwhile, brought the juice from the fridge, so he poured it into both glasses. </p><p>They sat down, and Richie started putting spaghetti with the sauce on his and Eddie's plates. Eddie could imagine spending time like this and eating with Richie every day, he felt like they had been together for years and not just a week. </p><p>When they both had food on their plates, they started eating. ''This is perfect for only knowing how to cook spaghetti,'' Eddie said after tasting the first bite, Richie smirked. ''Perfect? Just like you.'' Eddie blushed again while Richie was smiling at him. </p><p>''Perfect Eddie-Spaghetti.'' Eddie choked. Richie just started laughing. ''Are you okay?'' He asked, but didn't stop laughing. ''Oh my God, please don't call me that.'' Eddie was serious about that. He didn't know what was worse if ‘Eds’ or ‘Eddie-spaghetti’, but he hated both. Richie just laughed again, but didn't say anything.</p><p>They were eating in silence for another few minutes and when they were almost finished, Eddie remembered something he wanted to ask Richie about. ''Richie… Why don't you eat lunch at school?'' Richie looked at him in confusion. ''Oh… well I don’t need to; I don’t even eat breakfast… I am not hungry.'' That time Eddie looked at him in confusion. </p><p>''You can’t just eat your first meal when you get home, it’s not healthy,'' Eddie told him with concern in his voice. Richie was skinny, not too skinny, but naturally skinny, but Eddie knew it wasn’t healthy for him to just live on cigarettes and eat in the late afternoon or evening. ''I know Dr. K... besides I eat at school, smartass, don’t worry, you worry too much about me, and you don't have to.''</p><p>Eddie rolled his eyes. ''I’m just saying, I care about you,'' Eddie didn’t mean to say the last part at first, but he did because it was true, he was really starting to care about him a lot. </p><p>''Awww,'' Richie reached out across the table, so he could touch Eddie's cheek, ''I am really lucky, aren't I? My boyfriend is so caring, a caring spaghet.'' Richie started laughing, and Eddie pushed his hand away and looked at him angrily. </p><p>''Never mind, I hate you,'' Eddie said, and rolled his eyes again while Richie kept on laughing. ''No, you don't.''</p><p>After they were full, they went to the living room, and watched TV for a while. When it was time to go to bed, they got up. Richie went to take a shower first and Eddie just stayed in his room while he was waiting for him. </p><p>It was only a couple of minutes before Richie came back. Eddie had spent the time looking at the books, Richie’s collections of tapes and everything he had in his room. He wasn't touching anything because he didn't want to invade his privacy, but Richie had a lot of things that fascinated him.</p><p>When Richie came back, he was only dressed in sweatpants and had wet hair. Eddie was still not used to seeing him like that, even though he had seen him without a shirt a several times, so he looked away anyway. ''You can go now, the bathroom is at the end of the hall and you can borrow whatever you need there.'' </p><p>Eddie could tell Richie was enjoying himself judging by his voice. He knew Richie noticed that Eddie was avoiding looking at him. Eddie picked up a backpack with his stuff, and walked in the direction where the bathroom was supposed to be without a word.</p><p>Eddie was only in the bathroom for a few minutes, and when he was dressed in his pajamas and ready to go to bed, he went back to Richie's room. When he entered the room, Richie was sitting in front of his desk writing something. He was still wearing sweatpants, but his hair was almost dry. The moment he noticed Eddie was there, he hid the paper he was writing on, got up from his chair, and walked over to Eddie.</p><p>''You look so goddamn cute,'' Richie said, and took Eddie's cheeks in his hands without warning, and kissed him, ''cute, cute, cute.'' Eddie was completely flushed. He also felt like he was on fire with every touch between them.</p><p>Richie then went to the bedside table, and pulled something out. Eddie followed him, and sat on the bed. He noticed that Richie was holding a small box in his hand and was taking something out of it. Eddie immediately recognized what kind of box it was.</p><p>It was a box of pills that only a doctor could prescribe. Packs like that couldn't be bought at the pharmacy without a prescription, so Eddie started wondering what it was for. Richie pulled one pill out of the box, and swallowed it in a second along with the water he had on the bedside table in a glass. Eddie watched him wondering why he would need to take pills.</p><p>Richie noticed Eddie’s confused expression, sat down next to him on the bed, and smiled at him. ''It’s for my ADHD,'' Eddie was surprised that Richie decided to tell him, but was glad that he trusted him.</p><p>"Oh," Eddie didn't know what to say, he knew what ADHD was, but it didn't cross his mind that Richie was diagnosed with it. </p><p>''It’s not a big deal, you usually don't have to take pills unless it is serious, but I had a lot of problems because of it, especially at school, so my doctor prescribed it to me,'' Richie continued explaining it to Eddie. ''Richie you don't have to tell me this if you don't want to, at least not now.''</p><p>''Nah, I want to… I trust you, too, you know, it’s just… hard, I don’t want you to hate me or something because of who I am or my past,'' Richie seemed to be really serious. Eddie was happy that he trusted him and he felt like they are really starting to get to know each other and understand each other, but he also felt bad because he didn't want to make Richie feel bad about telling him about his past.</p><p>''I won’t hate you,'' Eddie took his hand into his own because he wanted to reassure him, ''is it the reason why you are retaking senior year?'' Richie smiled at him, and shook his head. </p><p>''No… well ... partly, but no… however, it's one of the reasons why I don't get along with my parents, Mags… I mean my mother, tries, but pops… well, '' Richie said sadly, but then he smiled at Eddie who was caressing his palm with his own fingers. ''I’m glad you told me, Richie, I understand it could be hard.’’</p><p>A few moments later, they decided to go to sleep. Eddie had Richie's entire bed to himself; he wasn't used to such a big bed. Richie lay down on the mattress they had prepared that afternoon, and turned off the light. </p><p>There was a complete silence while Eddie was thinking about how wonderful that day was, he really wanted to tell the others he was gay, and finally decided to give it a try the following week at Barrens. He was nervous about it, but it was the perfect opportunity, and this time he was sure he would do it.</p><p>He also decided to tell Richie, and ask him in the morning if he wanted to tell them they were together. He hoped none of them would mind. Eddie also realized that all the time he'd been with Richie, Richie had never once gone out for a smoke, he was wondering if it was because of him or not, but he was happy about it, not only that he didn't want Richie to ruin his health, but he would not want to kiss him if he could taste cigarettes in his mouth.</p><p>Eddie couldn't sleep at all when he was thinking about so many things. It could have been a few minutes, it could have been an hour, Eddie wasn't sure, but since he couldn't sleep he wanted to try if Richie was asleep. ''Richie? Are you sleeping?'' Eddie whispered. </p><p>He didn't expect to hear an answer, but he did: ''Go to sleep, kid,'' Richie didn’t even bother to whisper and there was no reason to when they both were awake. ''I can’t… can you maybe… sleep here with me?'' It had never occurred to Eddie that they could sleep together on the bed for some reason, even though they were dating. </p><p>He was just so used to the fact that he didn't sleep with anyone in the bed that it just didn't cross his mind at all. He also respected Richie for not pressuring him or thinking they should have, he was wondering why he didn't even ask him about it. Eddie thought that Richie probably didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable.</p><p>Richie didn't answer, instead Eddie heard a sigh from him. After a few seconds, Richie got up, and Eddie lifted the blanket for Richie to lie down next to him. Richie lay down, and Eddie hugged him tightly and laid his head on his still bare chest. Eddie could tell Richie was sleepy, even though he couldn't really see his face in the dark, but he smiled at him anyway. </p><p>''Better?'' Richie asked. Eddie nodded, and kissed his chest because he couldn’t reach his lips from the position he was at. Richie stroked his head, and started playing with his hair. It took only a few minutes and they both fall asleep at the same time.</p>
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